DREAM AGAIN with CHRISTIAN FRIENDS

MOURN to MORN

2010-05-26T12:46:00.000-07:00

Historians don’t agree on when Memorial Day started or who started it, but we all know it now is little more than a three day federal holiday to most people. However, whether you are one of the people who believe that organized women's groups in the South were decorating graves before the end of the Civil War or that it started in Charlestown, S.C. when slaves and abolitionists gathered the fact remains Waterloo N.Y. was officially declared the birthplace of Memorial Day by President Lyndon Johnson in May 1966. The bigger question seems to me to be what are we suppose to be honoring on this day?

It started out as a day to honor those you died in the bloodiest war ever fought on our soil. Since 1913 it has been a day to honor the dead of all the wars we fought and are fighting. You may wonder why I am writing about this on a website basically dedicated to mental health issues. Because there are people left behind each time a man or woman falls in battle.

Those left to go on living need support. They need more than a military graveside service. This country owes them ongoing support and I am not just talking about sending them a check. They need psychological and spiritual support and the country needs to make sure it does all it can to facilitate them getting connected to it.

Yes we have lots of wounded men and women being served by the Veterans Administration to varying degrees of success, but we need to take seriously our duty to the survivors of our fallen men and women. To do any less is a serious crime which should rise to the level of someone being held accountable.

I HEARD A VOICE

2009-09-07T10:20:00.001-07:00

In Recognition of National Suicide Prevention Week (September 6-12, 2009) and World Suicide Prevention Day (September 10, 2009) and in honor of all the families and friends who have lost loved ones to suicide I humbly offer this piece especially written for this day.

I Heard A Voice

Death of a loved one,
Penetrates deep into the inner core,
But when the death is a suicide,
It scars the soul of those who care.

Each time I felt the despair,
And death seemed so sweet,
Tears filled my eyes and my heart grew heavy,
Thinking of the ones who wanted me to stay.

It seemed another step was too much,
But how could I fail,
Those who trusted me to stay,
What would I say to them someday?

I cried out to my Lord,
If I must live,
Only You can give me,
The inner light I need.

I heard a voice from within,
Not the voices of a sick mind,
But the voice of a Living Lord,
He simply said, “I am here.”

By Ed Cooper
September 10, 2009

YOU CAN'T DREAM AGAIN IF

2009-09-02T05:30:00.000-07:00

As I have grown older and my body has developed more problems, I have become less focused on my mental illness or even the brutal childhood sexual abuse I suffered. I have come more and more to realize that the disabling pain of one’s brain, or body or soul all cause tremendous suffering.

Project Dream Again’s focus should not have been so narrow as a single cause or issue, but rather an attempt to address any disabling pain. I am not saying we should have tried to be all things to all people, but we should have recognized all people are in pain.

People can have their pet causes and support them, but if we are to follow the example of our Lord we will first be about the business of supporting people. The person in need no matter what their need is.

You can’t Dream Again if you are hungry. You can’t Dream Again if you are physically sick. You can’t Dream Again if your brain is betraying you. You can’t Dream Again if your soul is so dark no light can penetrate it. You can’t Dream Again if you just lost your home. You can’t Dream Again if ____ you fill in the blank.

Project Dream Again is evolving. I hope for the better. I hope it is becoming more humane at the same time it is becoming more Christ like. Person-centered is a word used in the human services world, but it is a word lived out in the life of our Lord. My prayer is that Project Dream Again will go down the path towards becoming an organization Jesus would approve of. A person-centered organization dedicated to showing God’s grace to all of His creation.

You can visit Project Dream Again at www.projectdreamagain.com

CHRIST ONLY HAS ONE BRIDE

2009-08-19T07:32:00.000-07:00

Christ only has one bride, but how do we recognize her? Are all the ecumenical efforts being made the way to go or are too many compromises being made in the name of unity?
These are serious questions in my mind.
For example, when I look back at major Reformation leaders Luther, Calvin, and Wesley I don’t see enough common ground to form a union.
The same holds true for what is called the Restoration movement here in America first started by a break from the Methodist Church by James O’Kelly in 1794. Others involved in this movement were Barton Stone, Alexander & Thomas Campbell, and others. Like the Reformation, the Restoration movement is now split into different denominations and independent churches.
Do we stand firm on what we believe the Bible says or do we try to work towards a more unified front?
One argument goes something like the more unified we are the easier it is to get the world to listen to our message. The problem with this is it is not our message. The Gospel is a timeless message. It does not need to be changed or rewritten. It is good enough for all ages now and into the future.
My point is yes we should always be reaching out to all people in the same way our Lord did. With open arms and a compassionate heart, but we should not and can not compromise on the Gospel message.
Sitting in Wednesday night Bible study not long ago, the definition of the word Gospel came up. The answers were many and varied. So I guess I had better define what I mean by “Gospel message” when I say I don’t think it should be compromised on.
It is the message the women preached to the disciples when they returned from the empty tomb and told them they had seen the risen Savior. They preached the first Gospel message. The Gospel message to me is about the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus and the grace God is freely offering us if we have the faith to believe. On this message, I see no way to compromise for the sake of unity.

THEN WHO IS?

2009-08-13T13:54:00.000-07:00

How would you like to wait for six days in the emergency room for a bed in the hospital to open up for you? What if another sixteen people were on the waiting list and you had no idea when you would get a bed? To make matters worse, what if you had not agreed to be hospitalized, but were being involuntarily committed because of a psychiatric condition? Would you like to be told we are holding you and treatment is coming someday? This is a real situation happening to a real person in the county in which I live in North Carolina.
Sheriff John McDevitt of Burke County, NC is quoted as saying, “The real issue to me and the real issue that I think is being missed here is, six days ago this patient needed some mental health care and she certainly hasn’t received any mental health care looking at a deputy.” That quote was in the August 12, 2009 issue of The News Herald along with a picture of a deputy sitting in the hallway of the emergency room of Grace Hospital in Morganton, NC.
Sheriff McDevitt said Broughton Hospital (the state psychiatric hospital that happens to be located in this county) had “bent over backwards” so it was clear he was not blaming them. He said there were no beds at Grace, which is a community hospital, and none across the state in other state psychiatric hospitals.
This is not just a North Carolina issue. It is an issue across the country. It was an issue before the economy went south and now it is a real crisis.
My biggest fears are the cuts in children’s services. I am not saying adults, the elderly, and veterans are not important, but children’s mental health, substance abuse, and developmental disabilities programs are especially vital. They cannot fend for themselves at all. You say they have their parents. Not all of them do and even if they do that does not mean that early treatment is not still vital to their recovery journey. The long-term results of failing to respond to their needs now cannot be measured in dollars, but it will cost more then than now.
Eunice Kennedy Shiver who died this week was from a famous family that included her brothers President John F. Kennedy, Senator Robert Kennedy, and Senator Edward Kennedy. She founded the Special Olympics and the first games were held in Chicago in 1968 just weeks after the assassination of her brother Sen. Robert Kennedy. Her brother Sen. Edward Kennedy has spent many hours on legislation to help the disabled.
Faith communities must step up in this time of national crisis and stand with those with disabilities. Most being the poorest of the poor and the least able to take care of themselves. If this is not who Jesus ask us to reach out to then who is?

RECLAMATION

2009-08-05T10:02:00.000-07:00

Usually to use a quote one would not do such a long introduction of the person they are quoting, but I want you to know something about the person who penned these words I am about to use. Henri Nouwen was an internationally renowned priest and author, respected professor and beloved pastor who wrote over 40 books on the spiritual life. Since his death in 1996, ever-increasing numbers of readers, writers, teachers and seekers have been guided by his literary legacy. Nouwen’s books have sold over 2 million copies and been published in over 22 languages. Born in Nijkerk, Holland, on January 24, 1932, Nouwen felt called to the priesthood at a very young age. He was ordained in 1957 as a diocesan priest and studied psychology at the Catholic University of Nijmegen. In 1964 he moved to the United States to study at the Menninger Clinic. He went on to teach at the University of Notre Dame, and the Divinity Schools of Yale and Harvard. For several months during the 1970s, Nouwen lived and worked with the Trappist monks in the Abbey of the Genesee, and in the early 1980s he lived with the poor in Peru. In 1985 he was called to join L’Arche in Trosly, France, the first of over 100 communities founded by Jean Vanier where people with developmental disabilities live with assistants. A year later Nouwen came to make his home at L’Arche Daybreak near Toronto, Canada. He died suddenly on September 21, 1996, in Holland and is buried in King City, Ontario. He wrote, “Receiving forgiveness requires a total willingness to let god be God and do all the healing, restoring, and renewing.”
Can we give the process over to God or do we need to control it by committee and hierarchy? We may be able to answer this question by looking at reclamation efforts down through the years. I call them reclamation because all of them do not fall under the Reformation.
Reclamation means the process of reclaiming or the restoration as to productivity, usefulness or morality. To explore this word even further some of its synonyms are renewal, rehabilitation, restoration, reformation, and recovery. Renewal, rehabilitation, and restoration give us the idea of returning someone or something to a satisfactory state of being. Reformation means redirecting the course from error to a proper focus and direction. Recovery calls to mind the concept of restoring something lost to its rightful place or making something or someone whole again by being on the right journey or path.
If you have ever seen a mountain being stripped mined, then you know what man can do to God’s creation with machines. The Appalachians, which may be the oldest mountain range in the world, are wounded in many places by mountain top removal to get at coal so we can have cheap energy. The coal companies are supposed to do reclamation projects, but you can’t redo the handiwork of God.
The Reformation was an attempt to reform or redo the church. In 2007, there was a 500-year celebration of when Martin Luther became a monk and when he conducted his first mass. This year is the quincentenary of the birth of John Calvin and again there is a celebration of the Reformation.
Jacobus Arminius (1560-1609) was appointed pastor in Amsterdam upon returning from studies in Italy. Since it was a reformed pastor's custom to preach through a book of the bible, Arminius began with Romans. Three years later, he was up to chapter 7. The big theological point that got him in trouble was his belief that free will is found only in the regenerate, in those whom God has freed to know and obey him. Unbelievers remain in bondage to sin.
John Wesley and Charles Wesley both certainly made huge contributions to the idea of the church having the proper focus and direction. However, John Wesley’s support of Britain during the Revolutionary War did not help the growth of the Methodist church here in America during that period.
James O’Kelly an Anglican by birth and a Methodist by choice after a disagreement with Francis Asbury started what he named Republican Methodists. The group was primary in eastern North Carolina. The James O’Kelly chapel founded in 1794 still stands and lies a few miles south of Durham, North Carolina. It became know simply as a Christian Church in 1802. James O’Kelly is known as one of the fathers of what is called the Restoration Movement that has already broken into at least three groups.
What is my point? The church is so divided into denominations and independent churches saying they have “the truth” where is a sinner in need of the saving grace of God supposed to go? Where does one go for reclamation? Does the church need reclamation? Does Jesus even claim His bride? These questions need answers if we are truly going to do the work the Lord left us to do. We, the church, can either help folks on their journey towards the One we know or act in a way that they look at us in disgust and want no part of us. To be a haven for reclamation our lives must be a proclamation of God’s grace in us to a wounded world.

Shattered Minds

2009-07-29T07:07:00.000-07:00

Becca Clark wrote in a comment to a recent thread, “I do think we run a risk when we generalize from personal experiences.” I have given considerable thought to her assertion and still find myself wondering if it is as true as it sounds. I have to ask myself how much of our entire belief system actual comes from our experiences. I am aware that there is suppose to be something we call hard science. Knowledge developed from pure research that produces facts. I am also aware of all the folks who believe the Bible to be without error and the inspired Word of God. Therefore, there are sources that people believe facts can come from. However, we know that scientific facts are a moving target because almost no one still believes the earth is flat yet at one time that was the science of its day. We also know not everyone agrees the Bible is infallible and the ones who do disagree on what it says. So I ask what knowledge can we count on not to be tainted by opinion and personal experiences?
For example, looking at the question of how to define mind one runs into more curves and dead ends than almost any subject science tries to define. To be ethical I must tell you I have a personal interest in this subject because things have been done to me “in my best interest”, but my only crime is my shattered mind. However, those of us with a mental illness and other disabilities or unpopular behavior, gender, color, sexual orientation, or monetary situations are handled differently by simply creating laws to suit the purposes of the society at large.
When researchers are studying mice, they are looking at less complex creatures than themselves, but when they are trying to define mind with their own mind a problem arises. Are they able to look objectively at a mind with a mind?
Let me back up. If you agree that a mind is merely a brain to be studied as we study any biological part of the human body then you will not agree there is a problem. However, if you think the mind is more than a mere mechanical machine then we can go on. If we need to believe in God, pray to God, and have a soul, where is that connection made? In a mechanical machine or a mind which is more than a biological brain.
I firmly believe that when my mind is shattered and I am not functioning well that my brain disorder is part of the problem, but the solution is not found only in psychiatric medications. Yes, I have bipolar disorder (manic-depression), but that also causes other problems in my mind and soul. I know Ms. Clark cautioned about making a generalization from one’s personal experiences and maybe she is right, but my guess is that there are many hurting souls just like me brought to their knees by a brain disorder (mental illness) which usually causes mind and soul problems.
We can as the body of Christ respond with compassion to those whose only crime are shattered minds and share with them the Good News about God’s love for each one of them.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN HUNGERY?

2009-07-21T14:45:00.001-07:00

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN HUNGRY?

Matthew 25:37-40 (New International Version)
37"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
40"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'

James 2:15-16 (New International Version)
15Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. 16If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it?

Have you ever been hungry for very long? I don’t mean just missing a meal. I mean not having the means to feed yourself. Have you felt the pains in your belly caused by the lack of food over a period of time?

The experts say six million children under the age of 5 die every year as a result of hunger. They also say that there are 840 million people in the world who are malnourished and more than 153 million of those are children under the age of 5.

“The integral relationship between poverty and hunger may not come as a big surprise, but still the statistics are shocking. Approximately 1.5 billion people live on less than US$1 a day and every 3.6 seconds someone dies of hunger.”
I found this statement on BBC World Service Website.

Why am I on this subject right now? First, I have lived on the streets of some of our largest cities here in the States and have gone hungry. Second, a large portion of people with disabilities such as mental illness live in poverty and their money runs out before the month does. Third, Cornel West, a Princeton professor, has publicly complained about President Obama being “too much in the thrall of the neoliberal elites.” [Newsweek/July 27, 2009] He said, “The moment of euphoria is over. We need intense pressure on Obama. Poor people are suffering. Working people are suffering.” Lisa Miller, Newsweek’s Religion Editor, piece was titled Remember the Neediest! with a subtitle of The Radical Left Versus The President.

We can argue till the cows come in about who should be doing what. What role does our government have? What role do private citizens have? What role do charities have? What role do faith communities have? The simple truth is that when you are hungry you don’t care were the bread comes from, but when we stand before the King, we will care if we fed the hungry.

THEOSIS

2009-07-21T05:05:00.001-07:00

PROCESS THEISM, PROGRESSIVE CHRISTANITY, PROTESTANTISM, and THEOSIS

Jennie Fowler Willing opened the New York Evangelistic Training School and Settlement House in the Hell's Kitchen area of New York in 1895. Willing, a Methodist laywoman, required students at the Training School who were preparing for mission careers to spend one hour a day working among the poor and to assist in the evangelistic services conducted nightly. These are her words, “We read the Bible through spectacles blurred by tradition…God be praised, we are out of the controversial belt. We have left behind the highways where theologians marched and countermarched. We study the book now, not for clubs with which to beat each other’s theological brains, but for food to make us strong to fight the common enemy.”

I hope I have not been doing that and I certainly hope this is not seen as such. I simply feel the need to attempt to define some terms and give some notion of my purpose and reason for even wanting to be part of this community. My purpose is because I enjoy the sharing of ideas and even the debating of them. The reason is that I need and want community.

I am not going to try to define Process Christianity. I will leave that to those who know far more than I do about it, but I would like to share a simple fact about process theism, which I found in the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy. “Process theism typically refers to a family of theological ideas originating in, inspired by, or in agreement with the metaphysical orientation of the English philosopher-mathematician Alfred North Whitehead (1861-1947) and the American philosopher-ornithologist Charles Hartshorne (1897-2000).” If you agree to the above as being accurate, then process theism is about God not being a finished product, but rather is in the process of becoming. Do not complain I have made it too simple. I already know it is a much more complex philosophical argument than that, but that is my ‘Reader’s Digest’ version. Since process means becoming, I am at a loss at how anyone could define Process Christianity or theism in any real terms.

If we start with the proposition that Progressive Christianity is more of a multifaceted movement than a theology in the strictest since of the word, then we may have a better chance of understanding each other. The Center for Progressive Christianity on their about us page claims in 1994 Jim Adams, the founder of the center and at the time the rector at St. Mark’s church on Capitol Hill in Washington, DC started using the term “progressive Christianity” at a time when no other “known organization, scholar, or church leader” was doing so. It seems to me that if I had to sum up the folks that might fall under this label they would be people who tend to be inclusive, accepting, participatory, concerned about social justice, and building a community where spiritual growth can be nourished. As has been pointed out in comments to a previous blog of mine Jim Wallis and Tony Campolo are folks who might agree they are progressive Christians. Wikipedia even listed John Wesley as a Notable Progressive Christian. The reason being he did take on the social issues of his day.

Protestantism is one of the main divisions of Christianity, which emerged from Roman Catholicism at the Reformation, a movement that questioned and ‘protested’ against the teachings and authority of the Roman Catholic Church. Protestantism takes its name from the protest of the German Protestant reformer Martin Luther and his supporters during the Reformation, in particular their protest at the Diet of Spires (1529) against the decision to reaffirm an edict against the Reformation made at the Diet of Worms (1521). So our claim to fame is that we are protesters and we still are, but do we know against what?

On the website of The Claremont School of Theology, we find these words “As a theological school of The United Methodist Church, Claremont has deep roots in the progressive Protestant tradition. Today, Claremont is building on this heritage and broadening its scope by transforming into an inter-religious university, a place for people of all traditions and perspectives to study, train and be transformed together. People around the world are taking notice ... and so should you.” So maybe I have found a new term. Progressive Protestant. What does that mean? They call it a “Pioneering Vision.”

Theosis is the understanding that human beings can have real union with Christ, and to some degree that we participate in the divine nature. This does not imply that we become gods, but rather, that we are to come into the fullness of the "divine image" in which we were created. It may be related to the Protestant concept of sanctification. It may also be seen as something akin to the John Wesley’s idea of "entire sanctification". It is defined by Frederica Matthews-Green in her book “The Illumined Heart: The Ancient Christian Path of Transformation” as “the process of being more and more in Christ”. I think I like the idea of theosis because it seems to be “food to fight the common enemy.”

PROGRESSIVE THEOLOGY

2009-07-13T08:16:00.000-07:00

My father was born and raised in Appalachia, but was determined to get an education. He did. He was an educator, minister, and missionary to Africa. He was my teacher while I was at Mashoko Mission in what was then Rhodesia now called Zimbabwe. My college education is more like an old time quilt made from leftover rags than a fancy new store bought bed cover. I am 60 and still have never completed a degree. However, I am an ordained minister and Elder in the Christian Church/Churches of Christ and a member of the Glen Alpine United Methodist Church, Glen Alpine, NC. I say all this to let the readers of this blog know who is making these statements and that I make no claim to be a major scholar on the issues. Then why am I making them? Because in a comment to a previous blog I wrote (Mad at God) Bill Chadwick on 7/11/2009 in a reply addressed to Becca raised some very interesting points that I simply could not ignore.
First, let me say his comments were most respectful and written by a person I can only describe as a thoughtful gentleman. The comments seemed both genuine and heartfelt.
Second, I was touched by what I felt was a note of pain I noted in the last paragraph of his comments when he mentioned personal attacks and being blocked from making comments by a poster. If I am right then I regret that anyone in this blog community is made to feel uncomfortable or to experience pain from what is suppose to be a place to find community.
Third, I also read in that last paragraph the words “progressive theology” and “progressive Christians.” Now let us see if we can figure out what is meant by these words.
In a paper, I found on the internet titled Progressive Theology: Some Musings from a United Methodist Perspective by Kah-Jin Jeffrey Kuan I found these words, “Many of us have said that the division within The United Methodist Church goes beyond the issue of homosexuality. We recognize that our division goes to the very core of our theological divide. We need to recognize further that our theological divide is rooted also in our biblical interpretation and the nature of the Bible as sacred text.” Well no big revelation here. He simply stated the obvious. I guess we will have to look further.
“As an ethnic biblical scholar, I know and have experienced how the textual interpretation of a dominant group has been used as a means to silence and deligitimize the interpretations of other groups. The same is true of theological discourse. Instead, what we need to do, as progressive theological thinkers, is to set the framework and parameters of our theological discourse. Simply put, how do we do theology?” Now we are getting somewhere. They want to set the rules of the game. I think I have seen this before. On the playground in grade school.
“A framework for doing theology that is both critical and constructive, individual and communal, contextual and incarnational, and that takes seriously the values of pluralism, feminism, liberationism, post-colonialism, and ecological and environmental responsibility impacts our biblical interpretation and what we see as the nature of the Bible. In my life as a student of the Bible, I have come to a conclusion that biblical interpretation is public discourse. Robert Allen Warrior talks about the reference to Native Americans as Amalekites and Canaanites by many Puritan preachers. The implication was clear, namely, that the Native Americans, like the biblical Amalekites and Canaanites, if they would not be converted, were worthy of annihilation. The annihilation of Native Americans during the colonial period was grounded in irresponsible biblical interpretation and bad theology. In doing “as if” and responsible readings, we will find ourselves in situations where we must speak and preach against the text, unmasking and rejecting harmful ideologies and bad theologies.”
Long quote, but now I think I get this progressive theology and Christian thing. Progressive means leaving the Bible in the dust and building a theology to your liking in a dust storm. Well I am what they call a folk theologian and philosopher, but even I can see the disadvantage of trying to study the Bible without believing in it or even wanting it in the room.
If progressive theology meant how to move closer to the Lord our Redeemer, then that is real progress, which is the root word of progressive. If being a progressive Christian meant walking in the footsteps of Jesus towards the foot of the cross where one finds the grace God is waiting to show us, then I am a progressive Christian. If progressive means being like Christ and living a life of radical compassion for our fellow man then let me on the boat with Jesus, but not on a sinking ship with those who want to write their own rules to the game.
My friends God wrote the rules when He created all that is. Grace is progressive. It moves the most unworthy into the very presence of our Creator. That is the definition of progressive.
Frances Perkins was Secretary of Labor for FDR for 12 years. The first woman to hold a Cabinet post. A true political progressive. She chaired the committee that drafted and developed the Social Security Act of 1935. She said she had an earnest desire to “to live for God and do something.”
The United Methodist Church may splinter into multiple pieces, but God’s Word to His people will remain. People will still be helping people in each church around the world. They can come up with term after term. Progressive theology. Liberation theology etc. The only thing that will stand the test of time is the Good News. The Gospel. The most radical and progressive movement on the face of the earth started on the day they hung God’s Son on the cross. When He broke the bonds of death and hell on Resurrection Day, we all won our freedom if we will follow in His footsteps. Now that is progressive.

*Quotes came from a paper on www.progressivechristianwitness.org
** My Website www.projectdreamagain.com

MEND A BROKEN HEART TODAY

2009-07-07T07:37:00.000-07:00

We need to go back to the beginning to a barn in the mountains of Appalachia. Because it was in that barn, my strongest feelings of being deserted by God were felt. I was not yet old enough to go to school, but I was old enough to be brutally used as a sex toy. It was not a single incident by a stranger. It was many victimizations over a number of years. My grandfather would first do something good and kind and later unexpectedly would come a sexual assault so brutal and painful I simply wished he would kill me.
Where was God?
It has taken me years to understand that He was in the barn with me. Why He did not stop it is a mystery only He knows the answer to. How do I know He was in the barn? Because I am now sixty years old and still alive and at least as sane as most of the folks around me. That means He was there. He helped me even as I denied He existed.
Researchers estimate that, in our country, about 10% of boys and 25% of girls are sexually abused. About 30% of those who sexually abuse children are relatives of the child, such as fathers, grandfathers, uncles, or cousins. The big question is why is it so hard to protect children from sexual abuse? (Note the percentages above are only for sexual abuse not all kinds of child abuse)
There are many answers given to the question I just posed, but the answer I am about to give is from my own personal experience. That does not make it right, but I offer it as a possibility. The main reason is that once we become a victim of childhood sexual abuse we no longer trust adults enough to tell anyone about what is happening.
Faith communities can play a major role in turning this whole thing around. Note I said community. In a community where all the adults are looking after the interest of the children, the disabled, the elderly, and the poor children will have a better chance and if they do become a victim are much more likely to tell.
Jesus was in the barn with me, but are we in the byways, busy streets, and sharing with the bloodied souls of our fellow sojourners the chance for the peace we know in our own hearts. The only evangelism that really works is heart to heart. Did you help mend a broken heart today?

MAD AT GOD

2009-07-05T07:44:00.001-07:00

I am mad at God right now so I immediately started building a case against Him. We do the same thing with friends or families who we think have wronged us, or we have some other reason to need to dislike or dismiss them. Therefore, I was delighted to find this gem in a novel I am presently reading. It goes like this.
“Well, sometimes when I see a guy like that, I say to myself, “There but for the grace of God go I,’”
Gail commented, “If God’s grace existed, there wouldn’t be people like that for you to say, “There but for the grace of God.’” (from Spencerville a novel by Nelson Demille)
However, my delight quickly passed and reality once again hit me in the face. God was not responsible for my anger. He was not the one who had committed the actions that were causing my anger. True enough He had not stopped them, but if He had, I would have been angry at that because that would mean He had decided to take our freedom away and turn us into robots.
The truth is I am responsible for my anger. Yes, something was done to me that should not have been done, but I am 60 years old and I know that I am not perfect and expecting perfection from others is simply insane.
Tolerance and acceptance of one’s self and those around them will lower the anger quotient. Tolerance and acceptance does not mean agreement or status quo. It means you may work to change what you can, but with a spirit not consumed by anger.
Anger is not only destructive to the person feeling it and the person or persons on the receiving end, but it prevents you from being heard either by the source of your anger or the larger community.
Anger produces violence in one’s deepest core and at times erupts into acts of violence. Every time I get mad, I at some point think about Jesus in the Temple and Him cursing the fig tree for not having any fruit on it. I say to myself even Jesus got mad. Whatever He was feeling we know He went to the Cross sinless. Can we claim our anger never causes us to sin? If we can’t make that claim then we need to claim responsibility for our anger. We need to stop demanding perfection before perfection is possible.
It will only be possible when we join Him in the place He is preparing for us. Till then we own our own anger. I guess I have to stop being mad at God. What a shame? It was easier than taking the responsibility myself, but if I am going to be honest and work on a healthy soul I must. The case I must build now is one of tolerance and acceptance without ever becoming resigned to reality as it is.
Working to improve my heart and the hearts of those around me. Working for the day that anger will pass away.

Wishful Thinking

2009-07-02T08:07:00.001-07:00

Eleanor Roosevelt, First Lady of the United States from 1933 to 1945, called wishful thinking America’s “besetting sin.” After her husband's death in 1945, she continued to be an internationally prominent author, speaker, politician, and activist for the New Deal coalition. She worked to enhance the status of working women, although she opposed the Equal Rights Amendment because she believed it would adversely affect women. She was also one of the founders of Freedom House.
The Mission Statement of Freedom House has these words in it, "Freedom House is an independent organization that supports the expansion of freedom in the world. Freedom is possible only in democratic political systems in which the governments are accountable to their own people; the rule of law prevails; and freedoms of expression, association, belief and respect for the rights of minorities and women are guaranteed."
"Freedom ultimately depends on the actions of committed and courageous men and women. We support nonviolent civic initiatives in societies where freedom is denied or under threat and we stand in opposition to ideas and forces that challenge the right of all people to be free. Freedom House functions as a catalyst for freedom, democracy, and the rule of law through its analysis, advocacy, and action."
So was she herself engaging in wishful thinking? Did God when He created us engage in wishful thinking? Is wishing thinking bad or just another name for hope?
Wishful thinking has a dream like or unrealistic quality to it. Hope can be based on wishful thinking or it can be based on a solid foundation. I am speaking about being born again to a living hope.
1 Peter 1:3-9 (English Standard Version)
“3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, 5 who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, 9 obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.”
We do not have to depend on ourselves for our hope or on wishful thinking. For those of us with a disability and our families that is more than mere words. It is comfort to a hurting and shattered soul. It brings peace, which means we can begin to dream again. Not just of the bye and bye, but of tomorrow. A peace that means the rising sun no longer is something to dread, but rather something that just might if we are lucky bring some small joy.

100% Tax Rate?

2009-07-01T06:38:00.000-07:00

I wrote this over two years ago and I still think it makes a valid point. I am advocating for a response that will cost less per person over the years, but the person making the comments thinks I am asking for a “100%” tax rate. It must be the single worst piece I ever wrote to get such a response. I am putting it out again because I think it applies even more today. Lets see what the response is this time.

Where is the COMPASSIONATE CONSERVATISM? (June 21, 2007)
By Ed Cooper
Phillip Yancy, author of numerous books says compassion simply means, “To suffer with”. I had trouble with that definition so I looked it up and found that WordNet said the verb compassionate meant to share the suffering with another. That sounds nice if it were possible. Remember President Bush said, “I call my philosophy and approach compassionate conservatism." (White House Press Release April 30, 2002) Wonder what he meant by compassionate?
In an Op-Ed piece in the New York Times recently Verlyn Klinkenborg writing about the report released last week by the Audubon Society which said millions of birds are missing wrote, “The Audubon Society portrait of common bird species in decline is really a report on who humans are. Let me offer a proposition about Homo sapiens. We are the only species on earth capable of an ethical awareness of other species and, thus, the only species capable of happily ignoring that awareness. So far, our economic interests have proved to be completely incompatible with all but a very few forms of life. It is not that we believe that other species do not matter. It is that, historically speaking; it has not been worth believing one way or another. I do not suppose that most Americans would actively kill a whippoorwill if they had the chance. Yet in the past 40 years its number has dropped by 1.6 million.”
Yesterday I was trout fishing on Wilson Creek not far from my home in the Pisgah National Forest and I could hear the birds. They added to the sound of the rushing water of Wilson Creek, which was added to the National Wild and Scenic River System on August 18, 2000, and made the experience delightful even though I did not catch a single trout. What if all the birds were gone?
Klinkenborg seems to be concerned if we will make the right ethical decisions about the other species on this planet with us and I do too, but I spend even more time worrying about the fact we have never learned how to treat each other especially if they are different from us.
To put it bluntly I have never been like most of the rest of my fellow humans. My mental illness and the fact that I was sexually abused as a young child over a long period has made it very difficult for me to fit the normal mold. In other words, I am not what I refer to as a chronically normal person. That means school was almost impossible and I was unable to finish college. I held over 50 different jobs before founding Project Dream Again in 1988. My point here is that I am one of those folks that you would not “actively kill” if you “had the chance”, but like the whippoorwill we are dying off. As I wrote in an earlier blog Marilyn Elias writing in USA TODAY about a recent study wrote that those of us in the public system die about “25 years earlier than Americans overall.” Where is the compassionate conservatism? Maybe it all went to Iraq!
To respond to the needs of folks with mental illness means meeting them where they are. Unfortunately, lots are on the streets or in jails and prisons, others living with families struggling to get them services promised but not forthcoming, some in state hospitals or private ones and others hiding because of the stigma of letting anyone know they are ill.
How do you reach out? By embracing them with compassion if you use the true meaning of the word. A true compassionate commitment to the mentally ill and their families would save government in the long term. It really is less expensive to treat people as if they are fully human than to lock them up in state hospitals or jails and prisons. Why can’t we learn? We ask the wrong people for advice.
Try this! Ask consumers, family members and frontline workers what is needed. Let them be the experts. Embrace a concept of recovery based on the real meaning of compassion. You will then find that “in the community” begins to mean something.

Under Comments I found this Reply: “Government cannot possibly solve every social problem that exists nor should they attempt such an impossible task. If you believe the government needs to take more money from people in order to pay for such programs than how much do you believe your taxes should be increased? Why is the cause of the mentally ill more important than the plight of the homeless, widows, orphans, storm victims, violent crime victims, uninsured or any other group of people who have just as much need. In order to provide for every group of "victims" to their satisfaction the federal government would have to impose a 100% tax rate and there would still not be enough money. Besides the shear impossiblity of providing for every need in existence the federal government does a horrible job of managing anything. While there are many excellent charities that keep administrative costs between 10-20%, it is not unusal for government programs to have admin costs in the 60-70% range. As individuals/Christians we do have a personal responsibility to assist those in need on a voluntary basis.
by Tony Jul 4, 2007 2:56 pm”

COMMUNAL HEALING

2009-04-22T08:29:00.000-07:00

We are experiencing a time in this country unlike any in my lifetime. I have been on this earth for over sixty years and more people in this country and around the world have their backs up against the wall than ever. Solutions are being sought, but are they really the ones that help people over the long haul. Do you give folks a fish or a fishing pole? The following piece comes off the website of Heifer International, which can be found at www.heifer.org

“A Midwestern farmer named Dan West was ladling out rations of milk to hungry children during the Spanish Civil War when it hit him.
“These children don’t need a cup, they need a cow.”
West, who was serving as a Church of the Brethren relief worker, was forced to decide who would receive the limited rations and who wouldn’t – literally, who would live and who would die. This kind of aid, he knew, would never be enough.
So West returned home to form Heifers for Relief, dedicated to ending hunger permanently by providing families with livestock and training so that they “could be spared the indignity of depending on others to feed their children.”
In 1944, the first shipment of 17 heifers left York, Pennsylvania, for Puerto Rico, going to families whose malnourished children had never even tasted milk. Learn about the cowboys who brought cows and kids together.
Why heifers? These are young cows that haven’t yet given birth – making them perfect not only for supplying a continued source of milk, but also for supplying a continued source of support. That’s because each family receiving a heifer agrees to “pass on the gift” and donate the female offspring to another family, so that the gift of food is never-ending.
This simple idea of giving families a source of food rather than short-term relief caught on and has continued for over 60 years. Since 1944, Heifer has helped 8.5 million people in more than 125 countries.” From the Heifer International website
This is more than a story about one man’s dream, but it is also the story of many people being able to dream again. The AARP Magazine in its May/June issue has an article by Barbara Kingslover about her trip to Nepal and the work of Heifer. It can be found at http://www.aarpmagazine.org/people/the_color_red.html

Why am I going into such detail about all this? Because if you want to help folks you have to reach out in ways that empower them to help themselves so they can regain and maintain the dignity of their humanness. That is what the Messiah did for us on the cross. He made it possible for us to be restored. To be completely whole again. To become a new person. Persons with brain disorders and their families need to know and to be able to dream again about becoming whole.

WE CAN DO BETTER

2009-04-15T07:15:00.000-07:00

I have never liked to be referred to as a case so I am not particularly fond of the term case manager, but trying to change common terminology only leads to more confusion and we already have enough of that in the mental health field. There are many ways to deliver case management services and they go by an assortment of names. Some of the names are intensive case management, supportive case management, assertive community treatment teams, broker/advocacy case management, wraparound case management, and clinical case management. Clinical case management is a model where the case manager is also the person’s primary therapist. Trying to define all the others would be futile because they mean slightly different things depending on where they are being put into practice and the resources available to the system implementing the model. They are also put together in varying ways in different systems across this country. The point is I cannot say supportive case management and everyone understand the word in the same way. The simple truth is we have an array of case management concepts implemented across this country working to varying degrees.
I want to suggest a team approach for those of us with a severe and persistent mental illness based on the idea that we are bio-psycho-social-spiritual beings.
Bio: The team needs a primary care physician, a nurse, and a psychiatrist.
Psycho: The team needs a psychologist preferably with a doctoral degree.
Social: The team needs social workers, rehab specialists, peers, and an advocate/broker case manager.
Spiritual: The team needs a pastor, minister, chaplain or some way to get to the spiritual care of their choosing.
This may sound grandiose, but preventive care and ongoing excellent care is less costly in the long run than poor care and hospitalizations.
We can do better and the truth is we have the moral obligation to do so.

Staff

2009-04-09T12:08:00.000-07:00

I have known mental health advocates who seem to think they are not doing their job if they are not finding something wrong the staff are doing or have done at a state mental hospital. It is a good thing to make the care received by folks who are locked away as first rate as we can. Most of them are not there voluntarily. Since we are forcing them to be there claiming it is our right as a state to do so, we certainly owe them our very best psychiatric care under the safest conditions we can possibly provide.
The key some folks seem to be missing is that the people working in state hospitals are humans with all the same emotions and baggage the rest of us carry around. Which means in very plain and basic terms if I want to be treated like a human when I am a patient in a state mental hospital then I had better hope the staff there are being treated fairly by their superiors, critics, the media, and the public. The better they are treated the more likely I am to be treated well. If you care about the patients, you will care just as much about the staff.
Recently, the staff at Broughton (the state hospital in Morganton, NC) was vindicated by a judge who said a previous investigation had not been accurate or fair. Will the public remember that or all the bad press?
We must at some point learn to respect each other enough to see one another as fully human. Staff, patient, family members, the public, media, and government all have a role to play in this endeavor. As long as we can look pass, each other without seeing the humanity of the other we will remain in the darkness. The light only shines when we open our eyes and see the person next to us as they really are. Fully human no matter how flawed.

LETTER TO NC SEC OF HHS

2009-03-03T03:34:00.000-08:00

February 27, 2009

Lanier M. Cansler, Secretary
NC Department of Health & Human Services
2001 Mail Service Center
Raleigh, NC 27699-2001

Dear Secretary Cansler:

I am a person with a psychiatric diagnosis, I have family members with a psychiatric diagnosis, and for the past twenty years I have been an advocate for those of us with a mental illness both here in North Carolina and when I lived in Florida. I say this only to make the point that the mental health arena is not new to me and it touches my life and those I love.

I have served on the governing board of a state hospital, the mental health planning council for a county of 1.5 million people, started programs, did trainings, spoke at national conventions, and have helped run a nonprofit for twenty years. I understand that unsolicited advice is seldom welcome, but I am going to take the risk of offering some based on the above experiences I have just mentioned.

First let me make the disclosure that I am presently a member of the Human Rights Committee at Broughton Hospital, but I am writing this letter as a private citizen and not in any way on behalf of the Broughton HRC.

Number 1: Abuse & Neglect in North Carolina’s State Psychiatric Hospitals

I appreciate your standing up for us and taking a “zero-tolerance” policy towards abuse and neglect of us in state psychiatric hospitals and I do not doubt you mean it. However, there are some things you might want to look at. When an allegation is made that a serious crime has taken place such as rape, what are the qualifications of the person doing the investigation? Is the possible victim taken to a rape crisis center? Who decides when the outside authorities are called? Which outside authorities are called since it is state property? Should state employed advocates be deciding substantiated or unsubstantiated when serious crimes (possibly felonies) are being investigated?

Number 2: Transfer of State Psychiatric Beds To Private Corporations

In a release dated February 5, 2009 from your Dept. it is revealed that Old Vineyard Behavioral Health Services which is owned by Universal Health Services has filed an application for a Certificate of need to relocate 50 beds from Broughton to their for profit operation in Winston-Salem. Dr. Michael Lancaster working in one of your divisions (MH/DD/SAS) is quoted as saying, “They are essentially paper beds” in the WSJOURNAL. There are a couple of problems with this statement. First, in an article in the February 6, 2009 issue of Psychiatric News there is an article titled “State Hospital Admissions on Unexpected Upswing”. It says “The number of admissions to public psychiatric hospitals in the United States dropped from a peak of 475,000 in 1971 to fewer than 160,000 in 2002. … The number of admissions rose by 21% from 2002 to 2005 after a historic decline since 1971 because of deinstitutionalization.” It also says, “Historically, when the economy gets bad, inpatient use rises.” This being said it is logical to assume the western part of this state that Broughton Hospital serves will need those beds. If not in Morganton then west of Morganton not east making it harder on families living in the western part of the state. Then ask yourself how a company looking to make a profit and hire the very best people and provide the latest evidence- based recovery person-centered services can do it without cutting corners somewhere? What about quality control? If you are having a hard time now controlling abuse & neglect, what do you think a for profit corporation will do to make sure you do not find out what is going on at their operation? Almost anything was my experience when they turned over South Florida State Hospital to a for profit company who had been building and running prisons.

Number 3: Including Persons With Psychiatric Disabilities In Decision Making & Planning

Here one is always tempted to find the closest or the easiest to get along with or maybe a person with degrees already working within the system. Sometimes even a person who has made a career out of being a person with a label and is now a consultant is called in. Let me suggest at times you might want to hear from grassroots folks. People living each day in the trenches with their mental illnesses. My point here is you might want to consider some horizontal lines rather than just vertical lines when looking at your organizational chart. Horizontal management is not a new concept in mental health. The first Veterans Administration hospital I was ever in had what they called ward government. The patients handled most of the problems that arose on the units. There have been many models down through the years. Peer run programs which by the way cost less. Peer joined with Faith-Based is not a new idea either.

My point here is you need professionals and I am not trying to say otherwise. I would not have wanted my abdominal aortic aneurysm surgery done by a friend. I would not want a friend writing my psychiatric medication prescriptions. However, there are things that we do better than someone who does not have a mental illness which I call “ chronically normal people” or even a family member of a person with a mental illness and that is a give a very different viewpoint of the services being offered.

For example when I look at North Carolina’s Person-Centered Planning model I am struck by how many people they ask in addition to me about what I should be working towards in my life. It does not even seem like the process understands it is my life. It doesn’t belong to my family. It doesn’t belong to my friend. It doesn’t belong to anybody but me. Would it not be wonderful if Carl Rogers could come back to life and remind folks what person-centered is?

OK! Enough and I thank anyone who has taken the time to read it.

Respectfully,

Ed Cooper

Cc Governor Beverly Perdue
Leza Wainwright, Director /MHDDSAS
Sen. Jim Jacumin

DAJ ONLINE/ June 25, 2008

2008-06-26T04:41:00.000-07:00

I am just now getting back to somewhat of a normal routine after going to the National Alliance on Mental Illness Convention in Orlando. I had not spoken at or even attended one since the early 90’s. I went because Dr. Gunnar Christiansen asked me to come speak at the FaithNet Special Interest Workshop on Saturday morning of the convention.
Giving the speech is not the hard part. I have been preaching since I was 12 years old on the mission field with my parents in Zimbabwe, Africa. However, the crowds are a different matter. I don’t care how big the audience is, but the crowds of people before and after are a problem.
Someone asked why do I write so much about myself? Because I am the only person I know well enough to say much about and the only one, I have permission to say personal things about. By sharing my personal thoughts and feelings, I hope in some small way to provide a window into the inside of those of us with a serious mental illness or who have been sexually abused or both.
The stigma of mental illness and of being a victim of childhood sexual abuse has left me with little of what a psychologist would call a self. My anxiety level sharply increases in a crowd. During the speech I am fine because I control the entire conversation and I know I am at least OK at giving a speech, but before it and after it I am at the mercy of the same stigma that has haunted me all my life.
At the convention, Patty worked the FaithNet booth where they were kind enough to allow us to sell our books for Novastar Opportunities for the Mentally Ill, Inc. I was not there other than to say hi to Patty a couple of times.
I enjoyed meeting folks I knew and making new friends. I finally got to meet Gunnar and his wife Susan that as I said was the reason I went. I also got to spend time with a graduate of Yale Divinity School, Rev. Bob Dell, who had studied under H. Richard Niebuhr. I also got to meet the founder of Mental Health Ministries, Susan Gregg-Schroeder, who I have exchanged many emails with.
Sunday morning I was headed to the FaithNet Interfaith Worship Service when all of a sudden I saw a person surrounded by security guards. I lost it. I did make it on to the service with the help of Patty and Cassy (my great niece). The service was led by the Rev. Willie Israel pastor of the Rolling Hills Moravian Church in Longwood, Florida. Her message along with the music calmed me back down.
A tie back to the last convention I attended was meeting Dr. Brenda W. LaVar again. We had presented together at that convention. A woman so much alive she is contagious. If she were preaching at a church that had died, she could bring them alive and have them shouting and singing like an old time camp meeting of long ago.
Zimbabwe is in the news more than ever now. Before when I would tell someone I grew up on a mission station in Zimbabwe (then Rhodesia), they would ask me where it was. Now more people have heard of it because of the election mess, but more troubling than the election mess is that people are starving to death. This is from the AP.
“Bread has disappeared from stores. Previously, a loaf in a supermarket cost 2 billion Zimbabwe dollars (20 U.S. cents at the official exchange rate), or 15 billion Zimbabwe dollars ($1.50 U.S.) on the black market. A shopper lucky enough to find milk will spend 3 billion dollars (30 U.S. cents) for about 1 pint. A tray of 30 eggs, also scarce, can bought in a store for 45 billion dollars ($4.50 U.S.).Butter is hard to find, but 17 1/2 ounces of margarine will cost 25 billion dollars ($2.50 U.S.) and a pack of 10 cookies costs 19 billion dollars ($1.90 U.S.).
Robert Rotberg, director of Harvard's Kennedy School program on Intrastate Conflict, said that while sanctions and boycotts may not convince Mugabe to loosen his grip on power, they are sure to sway public opinion and possibly change the minds of top military leaders.
Without his security apparatus and their intimidation tactics, Mugabe's power "could vanish overnight," said Rotberg, who wrote a column in the Boston Globe on Wednesday comparing the current situation in Zimbabwe to Idi Amin's Uganda.
Rotberg said neighboring countries could "effectively bottle Mugabe up" by banning Zimbabwean aircraft from flying over their airspace and curtailing electricity deliveries to the landlocked country. The U.N., African Union and Southern African Development Community could then push him aside to take over during a transitional period until they can ensure a free and fair election.
"Tightening the noose will make the people around Mugabe realize that this ship is really sinking, and they should get off," he said. “
N.T. Wright in his book Simply Christian writes “There are two sorts of traveler. The first sets off in the general direction of the destination and is quite happy to figure things out on the way, to read the signposts, ask directions, and muddle through. The second wants to know in advance what the road will be like.”
The recovery journey is not an easy road to travel and one must be much more willing to be like the first sort of traveler. You may know the destination, but you will not be able to predict all the pitfalls and side trips. To learn to Dream Again and make the recovery journey takes courage and strength. Remember that when someone is talking down to you or asking you to settle for less. Reach high where God waits with open arms for all of us.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org
www.miministry.org

DAJ ONLINE/ JUNE 4 EDITION

2008-06-05T04:55:00.001-07:00

[This Journal is posted at Project Dream Again’s web site, Google’s Dashboard, Yahoo’s 360 beta, MySpace, and 7villages an online community of the United Methodist Church. You can find the internet addresses at our homepage. The Journal is also sent out to an extensive e-list. To have someone added or taken off the lists simply make the request by using the email address found at the end of this Journal.]
NEXT JOURNAL COMING WEDNESDAY June 25, 2008
Dream Again Journal Online
June 4, 2008 EDITION
The next DAJ ONLINE will not come out until June 25th. I will be speaking at the national convention of the National Alliance on Mental Illness on Saturday the 14th of June during the FaithNet Special Interest Workshop which runs from 9:45 am – 12:00 noon. Patty and I are also making a vacation trip out of going down to Orlando from Glen Alpine, NC along with business stops coming and going.
One of the recommendations of at least one of the three work groups formed some months back by Secretary Dempsey Benton, Department of Health and Human Services, was adding trained investigators with law-enforcement experience to review complaints of abuse and neglect at the state psychiatric hospitals here in North Carolina. [Reported in THE NEWS OBSERVER May 31, 2008] I have debated this one in my head and discussed it with other consumers of mental health services. My first reaction was to agree because I truly do want the most professional investigation that can be done. Then I began to remember the treatment I have personally received at the hands of law-enforcement to say nothing of my fellow sojourners. Without committing a crime I have been treated in ways the two cats that live in our home are not treated. So now it comes down to a matter of trust. Yes we want professional investigations. Can we trust people who have worked in law-enforcement? Would it be simpler to train someone who knew something about us about how to do investigations than to train ex law-enforcement folks about us? You tell me.
There is an interesting question arising in the philosophy surrounding the brain sciences. Will the more we learn about the brain mean we can believe less in free will? The more they find out about my bipolar illness the better it is for me, but if I try to use it to excuse all my bad behaviors then I am the loser. I believe that neuroscience has made my life easier, but I don’t believe it will ever define me totally. Why? Because beyond my brain I believe is my mind which is more than mere brain and beyond that my eternal soul. You say well Ed you certainly have taken a leap of faith there. My reply is we both did when we believed the neuroscience neither of us understands. We operate on faith every day. If my belief in an eternal soul is merely a delusion then please don’t try and “fix” me. Leave me in my delusional state. Let me face this world each day with my faith and my science. I have a better chance of making it this way. Chat with you again on the 25th.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org
www.miministry.org.

DAJ ONLINE/ MAY 28 EDITION

2008-05-28T04:50:00.000-07:00

I have never done this before on the blog or the DAJ Online, but I am asking those of you who believe in the power of prayer to pray for a friend’s son who is in intensive care in Winston-Salem, NC suffering from a head injury. The last report I had he still had not regained consciousness. Thank you in advance for your prayers and concern.
I have a friend who has created another world which is rather complex. He named it Goosville. One of the meanings of goo is excessive sentimentality. He has spent a lot of time alone and in that world over the years. One of the things I like about the world he has created is that the animals there speak the same language as humans. That would certainly be helpful with my wife’s two cats. The most important thing about this world is he does not seem to think he controls all the people or animals in it. Now if I created a world everyone in it would do as I wanted them to. I think we could all learn from my friend’s created world into which he retreats when our collective world either ignores him or he can no longer deal with it. He is not the puppeteer even in his own created world.
Recently a letter Albert Einstein wrote to a philosopher sold at an auction for $404,000.00. It was a letter about his views of God and the Bible among other things. He called the Bible “pretty childish” and said the problem of God “is too vast for our limited minds.”
At times it seems like I am moving slowly towards 60 and at others it seems like I am speeding towards it. All I am sure of is that this November I have to stay far away from my older sister because she does crazy things to people on their 60th birthdays. Have I learned anything about this problem of God in these 60 years?
Maybe a couple of things.
First, I agree that God “is too vast for our limited minds”, but the story does not end there because I believe we have souls and that it is thru faith not logic that we learn to know our Creator.
Secondly, like my friend in the world he created, I think our Creator is not a puppeteer which means Einstein and all before him and you and all after you have the free will to decide for yourselves what you believe about the Creator.
Even those of us with mental illnesses have the need and right to be in community with folks who hold the same beliefs and opinions we do. When I started my research in 1988 on faith communities and folks with mental illnesses and their families, I was advised not to discuss religion with people with mental illness because it might encourage their delusional system.
On my most psychotic day living on the street I may not have been able to discuss the finer points of Systematic Theology, but I could have understood a piece of food and a hug as being love.
I loved an article I found in The New York Times the other day. It says I may not simply be getting forgetful as my brain grows older, but wiser.
“Some brains do deteriorate with age. Alzheimer’s disease, for example, strikes 13 percent of Americans 65 and older. But for most aging adults, the authors say, much of what occurs is a gradually widening focus of attention that makes it more difficult to latch onto just one fact, like a name or a telephone number. Although that can be frustrating, it is often useful.”
“It may be that distractibility is not, in fact, a bad thing,” said Shelley H. Carson, a psychology researcher at Harvard whose work was cited in the book. “It may increase the amount of information available to the conscious mind.”
But the best part is yet to come.
“Jacqui Smith, a professor of psychology and research professor at the Institute for Social Research at the University of Michigan, who was not involved in the current research, said there was a word for what results when the mind is able to assimilate data and put it in its proper place — wisdom.
“These findings are all very consistent with the context we’re building for what wisdom is,” she said. “If older people are taking in more information from a situation, and they’re then able to combine it with their comparatively greater store of general knowledge, they’re going to have a nice advantage.”

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

DAJ ONLINE/ MAY 21 EDITION

2008-05-21T04:43:00.000-07:00

There are three races 2/3 finished which may turn out to be historic races. I am not talking about the run for the Presidency of this country. I am talking about the running of the Triple Crown of Thoroughbred Racing (although sometimes shortened to Triple Crown, the full name is used to avoid possible confusion with other sports) consists of three races for three-year-old thoroughbred horses. Winning all three of these thoroughbred horse races is considered the greatest accomplishment of a thoroughbred racehorse. In recent years, the Triple Crown has become a very rare achievement, with most horses specializing on a limited range of distances.
In the United States, the Triple Crown consists of the:
Kentucky Derby, run over 1.25 miles (2.01 km) at Churchill Downs in Louisville, Kentucky;
Preakness Stakes, run over 1.1875 miles (1.91 km) at Pimlico Race Course in Baltimore, Maryland;
Belmont Stakes, run over 1.50 miles (2.41 km) at Belmont Park in Elmont, New York.
The Triple Crown starts with The Kentucky Derby on the first Saturday of May. The Preakness follows two weeks later. The Belmont Stakes is three weeks after The Preakness in early June. In the U.S., the term "Triple Crown" is the usual reference for these three horse races unless another sport is specified.
In 1930, Gallant Fox won all three important races, and sportswriter Charles Hatton brought the phrase "Triple Crown" into the American lexicon. In the more-than-125-year history of the U.S. events, only 11 horses have ever won the U.S. Triple Crown; none since 1978.
To a person like me born on the edge of horse country near Lexington, KY these races are important. I grew up either wanting to play basketball for the University of Kentucky or riding a thoroughbred in the Kentucky Derby. I was too big to be a jockey and too short to be a basketball player for Adolf Rupp the then famous coach at UK.
My life took another road. We went to Zimbabwe as missionaries and then in 1967 I entered the US Army. I was trained as a medic and mostly worked in an orthopedic ward in El Paso, Texas. After that I held over 50 different jobs before forming N.O.M.I. Inc. (know me) in 1989.
Am I am thoroughbred or simply a workhorse? Maybe I am not even a very good workhorse. The point to all this is that the road to recovery takes a long term view not a short term one. You will face defeats, but they must be viewed as fire fights or small battles. Not the war.
The Gospels have a long term view as they talk about life after death, but they also have a short term view as they tell about Jesus healing the sick and feeding the hungry. In 1988 before N.O.M.I. Inc. was formed in 1989 I formed Christian Friends of the Mentally Ill which is still a division of N.O.M.I. Inc. I still believe that churches have a vital role to play in the recovery process by providing some of the natural supports so necessary for us to make the journey down the recovery road.
However, just because I am a Christian does not mean that I see no value in other spiritual paths. After last week’s DAJ Online a friend of mine sent me a very uplifting email. She follows a different path, but her email was powerful medicine to my soul.
We need our souls nurtured as much as we need anything bio-psycho-social. Until the powers that be recognize that fact each of us are left to put our own support system together.
By RICK EANES
Published: May 18, 2008
T.S. Eliot told us in “The Waste Land” that April is the cruelest month, and he may have been right. But for the mentally ill, the cruelest month of the year is May — National Mental Health month.
I realize that I should strike into a paean about how the mentally ill are not treated fairly by society, or that in the United States, there are more than 20 million mentally ill people, or in Virginia, 20 percent of all households are affected by mental illness.
But we are more than the shabbily dressed, smelly man that mumbles to himself as he waits in line. For any parent, the aforementioned scenario is frightening. Nevertheless, there are more than 100,000 of us in Virginia. We cannot all be in grocery store lines. We cannot all be in jail. We cannot all be on a prayer list.
So maybe, just maybe, it is time to look and see us for what we are.
We are better than you are. None save the mentally ill will understand that statement, but I will explain. A great myth in mental health is that we long to be as you are. There could not be greater folly. Every day we must be more than you are. To rise from the bed is no great task for most. Nonetheless, the mentally ill know that there are days, months and possibly even years where the clarion call to rise and shine goes unanswered. We freely take medications that have side effects ranging from a dry mouth to sexual side effects to tremors that are not reversible. We may fly into rages and frighten people.
Still, how different are we from others?
You may know that many of the mentally ill have a drug problem, superimposed over mental illness. I know firsthand, for you learn early in an abusive life that alcohol provides a release. Even though you are sometimes gut-wrenchingly sick, you know it is a palliative of great value, for it aids you as you strive to cope.
Many of the mentally ill were, such as myself, made through verbal and physical abuse. Still others have impairments of thought through accident, through drug use, through fetal alcohol syndrome and, yes, some are just born mentally ill.
Consider yourself, consider your children, consider your relatives and make them one of us. They need services but they have no money or little money. The experts have told them what they need, but they can’t afford the help.
I say that May is the cruelest month for the mentally ill, for much will be said and written. This information is designed to satisfy those that are not mentally ill. More than likely, statistics will be brought forth and they will read we had this much last year and now we have only that much.
The governor recently signed mental health legislation. This means that it will be easy for someone to be committed, but the person cannot as easily discharge himself from a hospital as before.
A great truth concerning this legislation is that none has, to date, addressed what happens if a person with a weapon is willing to sacrifice his or her life. If that’s the case, then there is nothing able to protect a single soul.
Certainly, the Virginia Tech massacre caused people to cry out and demand that something be done. We do not have a voice, but something has been done, and we have been ignored. Our cries are silent, for they are inward.
Imagine, for a moment, that you are in a large hole. The hole is really a chasm so large, in fact, that you have no hope of ever climbing out. As all would do, you cry out for help. When that does not work, you scream at the top of your lungs. None has heard either cry. You now are desperate; you have no energy, no will to even give the occasional shout. Inwardly you scream and inwardly you imagine rescue. It is inwardly you will live out the last moments of being alive.
This is the mentally ill — needing help but having been turned down too many times. All our anger and demands for action take place inside. We have come to appreciate that we are the next highway expansion or the next raise given by the state to its employees.
The month of May more than half gone and the state’s only offer of help is a program that governs commitment procedures and the voluntary discharge of a patient from a psychiatric institute — and purports to increase campus safety.
May is the cruelest month, for many times the mentally ill have been told to buy bread and wait and someone would come and help them. Time passes, the birds eat the bread and, like any dressed-up, stood-up person, they waited. For some time, they believed a new day had come. It has not — and 20 percent of Virginia suffers.
Our goal is that you see us and hear us when you pass by the chasm. We, too, wish to become, in a world of equality, one of the more equal. In the Bible, Job cries out into the blackened void, where now is my hope? It is the same question hundreds of thousands of us will ask during the merry month of May — our cruelest 31 days of the year.
Eanes lives in Danville
[Published on GoDanRiver.com which is brought to you by the Danville Register Bee, the Eden Daily News, the Madison Messenger, and the Reidsville Review]

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

DAJ ONLINE/ MAY 14, 2008 EDTION

2008-05-16T00:03:00.000-07:00

[I received this e-mail after the last Journal went out.]
Ed:
Just a few thoughts on your most recent blog that I just received in my email.
I had a great friend who was a vet that committed suicide in the VA hospital in Asheville. She was diagnosed with schizophrenia and was coming out of a psychotic depression. Unfortunately a staff member gave her belt back to her and she went to the bathroom and hung herself.
Talk about guilt! I knew that she would eventually succeed....and I knew (looking back) that she was slowly but surely telling everyone goodbye in her own way. She and I lived together....she gave me my one and only dog---Rascal. She said that he was to give me company and comfort while she was hospitalized.
She was a wonderful person.....when she was on her medication. As you and I both know (I know about this one) if one doesn't take their psych medicines....then they suffer needlessly incredible symptoms of their disease.
I really do miss her! About 3 weeks ago, I found myself at her gravesite---don't normally visit but the anniversary of her death was coming up....and then 2 weeks later I attempted suicide by overdosing on my Klonopin. However, there were other factors that were there also!
Do I regret what I did? Every moment, every day of the life that I have been given to live I will regret it. Did I learn something from it, definitely....and still learning from it! Will I do it again....well, not right now. I can't promise anyone that it will never happen again cause one never knows what kind of extreme stress one can be under (and I was there!).
Thanks for writing your blog and being kind enough to send it to me. Congratulations on your being invited to speak at a convention.
Susan (This is not her real name, but the one chosen by her when I asked permission to publish her letter here.)
Some of you who read this Journal know me, but most of you don’t. I use my own experiences to try and explain what life is like living with a mental illness or living with the results of having been sexually abused as a child. I don’t know any other way to open a window into our world. I can’t really tell you what it is like for someone else. I can only share with you what it is like for me and for those who I have known.
Usually spring brings not only new life to the earth around me, but also new life to my spirit. However, this year has been very different. I am guessing it is because my physical health is not up to par and I am not as active outdoors as usual. I have never really had to deal with my body letting me down. My brain has never worked as it should consistently and I have come to terms with that. I have even learned how to live with a dissociative disorder caused by early childhood sexual abuse. This broken body thing is different from a broken brain.
When I don’t feel like getting out of bed is it my depression from my bipolar disorder or my broken body? What doctor can I go to who can tell me? Are there specialists who can do a diagnosis and tell me whether my symptoms are coming from my bio or my psycho or my social or my spiritual?
I think I may be in trouble this year. This year may be a struggle. North Carolina did not even stock their normal number of trout for those of us who like to trout fish because of the drought. At least I have my family, friends and church family.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

DAJ ONLINE/ MAY 7 Edition

2008-05-08T05:43:00.000-07:00

I have been afforded the honor of being invited to speak at the FaithNet Special Interest Workshop on Saturday, June 14th at 9:45 am at the National Alliance on Mental Illness’s Annual Convention in Orlando, FL. I am looking forward to seeing old friends and making new ones.
####################
12,000 veterans a year attempt suicide while under the care of the Veterans Affairs Department. This piece of information was revealed in an e-mail written by Dr. Ira Katz, the VA’s Mental Health Director. He started his memo with, “Shh!”. Rep. Bob Filner, D-Calf accused the agency of criminal negligence in the handling of the data. Is the word criminal related to crime? Does that mean someone did something wrong? Will someone be prosecuted?
Since I am one of those veterans getting mental health services from the VA and have been since 1969, I have lost vets I knew who just didn’t attempt, but who completed the act while under the care of the VA. They have committed suicide while locked on the same psychiatric unit I was.
What are the numbers for our state hospitals across this country? Our private psych hospitals? Our community mental health centers? Our drug treatment programs?
How many folks actually complete the act while under the care of some system or mental health professional? I have not seen that number. Have you?
####################
The Robert Wood Johnson Foundation has awarded $14.8 million to five sites around the country to replicate the PIER program's approach as part of the Early Detection and Intervention for the Prevention of Psychosis Program (EDIPPP). PIER also serves as the foundation's National Program Office for EDIPPP.
McFarlane [psychiatrist leading the Pier program] told Psychiatric News that preliminary data indicate that the rate of acute schizophrenia per population has dropped within the PIER catchments area compared with the rest of Maine. Though those data remain to be confirmed, staff at PIER who are familiar with the long-term nature of schizophrenia express a genuine awe at the results they see at the clinic.
"I have worked in mental health at the other end of the spectrum with adults who have had schizophrenia and bipolar disorder for years," said Nelma Mason, R.N., a nurse at the clinic. "And I have worked with so many people who are one hospitalization away from never leaving the hospital again. How could you not be excited about being part of a program that might prevent that?"
Thomas Insel, M.D., director of the National Institute on Mental Health, who has visited the PIER clinic, said it represents a new direction in the treatment of schizophrenia.
"We have largely defined schizophrenia as psychotic illness, meaning when someone has a psychotic break," he told Psychiatric News in an interview. "That's a bit like defining coronary artery disease by having a heart attack. It's a late stage in the disease.
"What we have been thinking about is how to get people much earlier in the disease," Insel said. "If you think about schizophrenia in stages, stage 1 is early development and genetic risk; stage 2 is when people begin to develop very early, subtle symptoms such as social withdrawal and cognitive problems.”
"Stage 3 is a psychotic break, and stage 4 is when a person becomes chronically ill and disabled. Most of what we do in 2008 is focused on stage 4. And it is no wonder we have not much to show for it.
"At PIER they are really going after stage 2 and identifying people who may be at genetic risk and exhibiting very early behavioral symptoms," Insel told Psychiatric News. "So they are going down this very interesting path to see if we can have a bigger impact on the disease by identifying and treating people much earlier."
[from Psychiatric News]
####################
The UK annexed Southern Rhodesia from the [British] South Africa Company in 1923. A 1961 constitution was formulated that favored whites in power. In 1965 the government unilaterally declared its independence, but the UK did not recognize the act and demanded more complete voting rights for the black African majority in the country (then called Rhodesia). UN sanctions and a guerrilla uprising finally led to free elections in 1979 and independence (as Zimbabwe) in 1980. Robert MUGABE, the nation's first prime minister, has been the country's only ruler (as president since 1987) and has dominated the country's political system since independence.
My family went there in the late summer of 1960 as missionaries.
Zimbabwe is now in the middle of an election mess bigger than we had here in this country in 2000.
The hope for the future rests with the people of Zimbabwe. That may sound like an obvious statement to you, but if you look at how we have treated Africa it really isn’t. Missionaries did not just take them the Gospel. They wanted the African people to adopt the American culture as well.
I would like to point out one of the rays of hope which was highlighted at the General Conference 2008 of The Untied Methodist Church.
“Delegates were told that while Zimbabwe has an inflation rate of 200,000 percent – the highest in the world – the university, with a few challenges, continues to operate and fulfill its mission of educating its 1,400 students from 24 African countries.”
"The political situation has not affected the university. Your investment is secure," Tagwira said. "Both government and opposition politicians have great admiration for what Africa University has achieved. We remain open and following our normal calendar. We thank God for his divine favor," he said.
Earlier in the conference, delegates voted to increase theological education on the continent and to make the country of Malawi a missionary conference. Congolese Bishop Nkulu Ntanda Ntambo, chancellor of Africa University and chairman of its board of directors, thanked the General Conference for its support of funding education on the continent but cautioned that the effort "should not be at the expense of Africa University."
Ntambo assured the conference that "Africa University does not take away anything from The United Methodist Church or Africa. It only adds to the growth and strength of the entire church." [from umc.org]
My father was an educator/minister/missionary. Give the people the tools to help themselves. The same message I have been writing about here for months about us. Don’t just label us help us learn something useful that we have chosen.
####################
My wife and I recently made a trip to Eastern Kentucky. The mountains of Eastern Kentucky don’t look like the mountains of Western North Carolina or the foothills of WNC where we live. Eastern Kentucky is coal country and Kentucky is the third leading coal producing state in the country. It also has the highest rate of prescription narcotic abuse in the United States. It averages one drug-related death per day. Is there a relationship? Not directly to coal, but to the conditions the coal economy has produced. Our response to the problems of Appalachia, Africa, those in poverty, the disabled and those of us with a mental illness seems too much alike. We offer our solutions rather than asking how we can help. If only we believed more in the people we were trying to reach out to and less in our own wisdom, then we might find the real truth that God implanted more wisdom in the least of us than the greatest of us could ever figure out how to use.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

DAJ ONLINE/ APRIL 30, 2008

2008-04-30T06:07:00.000-07:00

April 30, 2008/ EDITION
Rather than writing twice a week on Mondays and Thursdays I have decided to change it to a weekly schedule. I have also changed the name to the DREAM AGAIN JOURNAL ONLINE. We published the DREAM AGAIN JOURNAL for a few years in the 90’s and so this is the resurrection of an old endeavor for Project Dream Again. The DAJ Online will come out on Wednesdays. Along with those folks who receive it by email it will be posted at the sites listed above.
**********
According to findings published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences outdoor activities is on the decline while people spend more time online or in front of the TV. For example fishing peaked in 1981 and by 2005 had dropped 25%. Visits to U.S. national parks are down 23% from their high point in 1987. Why does any of this matter? I could give you reasons like if you aren’t out in nature you will not be as interested in the conservation of it. However, let me see if this one finds it way into your inner being. Have you ever been feeling low and heard a bird singing and the sound lifted your spirit? Nature can nurture your very soul. Merriam-Webster Online defines nurture as “the sum of the environmental factors influencing the behavior and traits expressed by an organism.”
**********
Mark Penn has written a book titled Microtrends: The Small Forces Behind Tomorrow’s Big Changes in which he argues that it is the little things that shape the big things of the future. I want to share just a couple of things from the book. (1)The top 1% of American pets live better than 99% of the world’s human population. (2) 54% of black 12th graders said religion played a very important role in their lives, compared to only about 27% of white students, and their church attendance correlates with lower drug and alcohol abuse, later sexual activity, and altruistic attitudes. [Seems if they make it to the 12th grade their religion played a major role] (3) Ten times more men regularly visit Internet pornography sites than regularly watch baseball.
**********
Reinhold Niebuhr was one of the seminal religious thinkers of the 20th Century. As a theologian, ethicist, and pastor, he worked to make the Christian faith comprehensible to and responsible for the modern world. The legacy of Reinhold Niebuhr, along with his brother, H. Richard Niebuhr, is a socially engaged tradition of thoughtful Christian activism, and a realistic and sober recognition of the limits and possibilities of human aspirations.
Niebuhr began his career as the pastor of a German Reformed congregation in Detroit, but very quickly grew to national prominence as a writer and speaker on the issues of his time -- war, poverty, racism, and social inequality. He stood for a progressive Christianity that believed in making a positive difference in the world.
As his theology matured, he came to argue that the human capacity for evil could not be easily overcome by simple appeals to the love of God and neighbor. In rejecting those versions of the Social Gospel movement that seemed to be too reliant on a naively optimistic assessment of human nature, he began to develop his own approach, which came to be known as "Christian Realism." This realism stood in contrast both to the idealism of Christian pacifists and socialists who believed that social change could be brought about by pure moral suasion, and the cynicism of the more Machiavellian brand of realism, that believed that politics was a realm of power not subject to moral critique. Niebuhr sought a middle way between these two positions, recognizing politics as the realm of the struggle for power, but affirming the need for principle to underlie and uphold the human conscience in that struggle.
We need some of his realism today. We can’t afford more talk or study groups. We need action based on realism. What is really going on with real people in their daily lives? To learn to Dream Again and begin the recovery journey takes looking realistically in the mirror not rhetoric from Raleigh.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

FAITH FAMLIES

2008-04-24T04:58:00.001-07:00

I am not sure if my parents were happier the day I was born or the day a psychiatrist in Atlanta told them I had a brain disease called bipolar disorder and that all my problems were not their fault. You see before that day they had been blamed for my actions and how I turned out.
It seemed to weigh harder on my father than even on my mother. My mom told me more than once how hard my birth was on her and I was never really sure she forgave me. Dad seemed more concerned about how my behavior looked to the community. He was a minister, missionary, school principal and church leader. Having a son who did not conform to the norms of the day was not a comfortable feeling for him to say the least.
In our society today we place so much emphasis on the individual it may be hard for some of you to understand what I am talking about. Hebrew tradition and the fifth commandment says “Honor thy father and mother”, but we have mostly pitched that out with the other ideas we consider archaic in favor of making sure we do not infringe on individualism.
In Christian teachings we find in the 6th Chapter of Ephesians the same words as in the Hebrew fifth commandment. When Dad would remind me of this, I would quote from the 4th verse of the same Chapter where it says “Fathers do not provoke your children to anger” and he never seemed to find any humor in my response.
Along with the fact that Mother’s Day is almost here and Father’s Day is not far off there is another reason I am talking about family. Those of us with disabilities are going to need our families. We are going to need our extended families which include our FAITH FAMILIES.
We are in what I call silly season. Other people refer to it as election time. Right during election (silly) season President Bush has decided to cut Medicaid funding. These cuts could cost North Carolina almost 12,000 jobs and over a ½ billion dollars in Medicaid funding.
I have been writing, speaking and teaching about natural supports for years. Natural supports are things like family and faith communities that folks like me can rely on for help and support.
I don’t care how you vote or what party you belong to. This is not a political blog. I am saying we had better stop making the individual the focus and make our communities the focus. The early church practiced something I would call communal democracy. They took care of each other. It might be wise to look back to the early church and to Hebrew law and traditions and take a second look at the idea that maybe community is more important than the individual. Maybe the whole is greater than any single part. Maybe the least is the greatest. All I know for sure is we are going to need our families. Yes, our FAITH FAMLIES TOO!
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

A RESPONSE

2008-04-21T11:49:00.000-07:00

This is one of the responses I got to my last blog.
Hi Ed:
I had to look up this article; I also looked at the review article written by Compton et al from which he quotes. Reading between the lines it would seem the esteemed Dr. Geller has something personal against CIT—but hey, that’s just an opinion. The disdain for “many folks who are the ‘beneficiaries’ of frequent police pickups which lead to jail, emergency room, psychiatric hospital, or shelter…” is obvious. After all, “In a short time they’ll be back on the streets, and the play will repeat itself.” In other words, CIT is a waste of time and money because training cops to take people to treatment when the people don’t want it doesn’t work. It didn’t make the hairs on the back of my neck stand up; it turned my stomach. But you can ask Dr. Geller any question you want. At the bottom of the first column on the first page of the article is his contact information:
Jeffrey L. Geller, MD, MPH
Department of Psychiatry
University of Massachusetts Medical School
55 Lake Avenue North
Worcester, MA 01655
Better yet, his email is jeffrey.geller@umassmed.edu
I’m too pissed to email right now; if I ever do, I would ask what he would recommend, in light of the numbers of people who are on the streets untreated. And I would disabuse him of the delusion that treatment is readily available and accessible, because you and I know that it is not. And I would remind him, because he might have forgotten, that mental illness is a relapsing, chronic condition, and that we are prone to setbacks. Unlike superior specimens like him, of course, who have no need of professional help and who never have encountered the criminal justice system from the bottom side. By the way, his disdain is not only for consumers—did you catch the “I’ve trained police officers, and those who are interested pay attention; those who are not, do not.” This, obviously to him, is because police officers are different than other people? I know lots of psychiatrists who don’t listen or pay attention to their own patients!
What, I wonder, does he really want? Maybe he thinks cops should just be cops, and leave the treatment of mentally ill persons to the professionals.
He is a pompous ass. All that intelligence and all that ability, and this commentary is nothing but a mean spirited criticism of people who are trying to help. There is not a single positive recommendation, not a shred of evidence of concern for consumers, or for police officers, or family members, or anyone. I think we do need research. Evidence-based is always best. Always. I think CIT can be improved. So---we wait and do nothing until someone conducts a multicenter, randomized, double-blind study?
E-mail him if you must, Ed, but let’s not you or I spend too much time fretting over this. We have our own recovery to work on, and lots of friends to support in their recovery.
Jana
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

QUESTIONS

2008-04-17T13:32:00.001-07:00

When you read an article you can’t ask the author questions. I would like to ask Dr. Jeffrey L. Geller a few questions about his article “Commentary: Is CIT Today’s Lobotomy?”. {I found the article online in the Journal of the American Academy of Psychiatry and the Law Online} Dr. Geller, MD, MPH is a Professor of Psychiatry, Department of Psychiatry, University of Massachusetts Medical School and I am person with less than two years of college. So let’s come up with a title for me. I am an ordained minister, but that does not get me into this discussion. I am a primary consumer ( meaning I have a mental illness) and a family member ( meaning one or more of my family members has/have a diagnosis), but that does not get me in the discussion either. Maybe if I called myself a folk anthropologist I could get into the discussion. Well I declare myself a folk anthropologist. Do I now qualify for the larger discussion or am I still on the sidelines?
“Being in favor of educating officers of police departments about mental illness and mental health services is like being in favor of motherhood and apple pie. Who could be against it? Refining this educative process to cadres of selected officers who become informed, benevolent interveners on the streets of our cities (and maybe even our towns and villages), saving from jail those whose mental illness-driven behaviors bring them to police attention sounds even more right. It is this first-blush appeal that accounts for the proliferation of Crisis Intervention Teams (CIT) from their origin in Memphis, Tennessee, in 1988.”
That was how he began his article. He ended it like this.
“Finally, there's the cost of CIT. First, to train officers, police departments must carry part of their workforce on overtime since the officers in training are in addition to the normal workforce. This, in and of itself, hinders police departments from endorsing CIT. Second, there is a cost to the mental health system, since it is burdened repeatedly by receiving those who do not want services. Hospitals are called on multiple times each year to provide care and treatment to the same cohort of unwilling consumers CIT delivers to it. This is, in part, because CIT is an unleveraged process. There is no contract, the prospective patient has no responsibility, and there are no consequences. For many folks who are the "beneficiaries" of frequent police pick-ups which lead to jail, emergency room, psychiatric hospital, or shelter, the immediate outcome is irrelevant. In a short time they'll be back on the streets, and the play will repeat itself. For far too many, "CIT" might just as well stand for Consecutive Interventions without Treatment.”
Is this a sound argument? It sounds right. It is well written. It is argued by a prolific author and a highly regarded man in this field. Why do the hairs on the back of my neck stand up? It almost seems like in the end he stops writing about CIT and takes a shot at us. If we were not on the streets we would not be costing so much.
Well as he points out in his article we have been guinea pigs for many ideas over the years and eventually we seem to be resented for our mere existence.
My question to Dr. Geller and to my readers is very simple. As I have revealed before in this blog, I have spent lots of time on the streets too sick to even know my name at times. Do you think I would have rather been confronted by a trained CIT team or a SWAT team when I was so sick and living on the streets?
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

MENTOR

2008-04-15T05:45:00.000-07:00

I know I am a day late with this blog. I would not make a very good newspaper publisher or editor because you wouldn’t get your paper on time and if it was a daily you probably wouldn’t even get it every day. I spent yesterday with two great friends driving up from Glen Alpine, NC to Stone Mountain State Park, NC. Yes there is a SMSP here in NC as well as the more famous one in GA and I am sure there are more I don’t know about. We stopped in North Wilkesboro on the way up because we saw an antique store that looked interesting. Once inside we discovered it had four floors and decided we would need to come back because this store alone was a half-day adventure. It was full of the dreams of folks from the past and held dreams for new folks from the future.
We finally made it to the park were we saw deer, turkey and beautiful trout streams. I saw the biggest tom (a male turkey) I had ever seen in my life. There were three men there with packs on their backs and poles with round circles on the end. We tried to guess what they were geared up to do. We could not. Finally I walked over and asked them. They were student researches from North Carolina State University and the devices were to shock the fish in a portion of a stream so they could get a count of the fish. I wanted to go with them for a spell, but they didn’t invite me.
I don’t know much about being outdoors, but what I know I have learned from other people being kind enough to share their knowledge. The person who has been most patient with me and taught me the most about the outdoors and fishing is a guy named Russ. It isn’t the fact he has a graduate degree in the subject or worked and wrote in the field his entire working career that makes him a good mentor. It is first, that he is willing. Secondly, that he has the patience to deal with even me. Thirdly, he knows when to teach and when to let you try on your own. He makes a good mentor.
I found this in yesterday’s New York Times “On Saturdays during the school year and all week in the summer, PinChang Huang, 16, leaves her home in Queens just after dawn and boards a crowded van bound for a nail salon on Long Island.
Through a long workday, she gives manicures, pedicures and massages, and observes her clients at the Aroma Spa with a careful eye. Older women are most prone to yell if you make a mistake. Customers who read books tend to tip the best.
PinChang has not seen her mother since she came to New York with her father and brother four years ago from a small village in China. She spoke no English and had no friends, and all the buildings looked the same to her, so she often walked into the wrong apartment complex on her way home from school. To ward off frustration and loneliness, she started keeping a journal. “I wrote down everything I saw, everything that made me happy or upset,” she said. “I wrote the things I wished I could say out loud.” In front of a packed auditorium at the New School in Manhattan one night recently, she got her chance. PinChang and her mentor, Deborah Kolben, a former managing editor at The Village Voice, read an essay they wrote together about PinChang’s getting her first manicure. PinChang spoke about the peculiar sensation of being on the receiving end of an exchange that often makes her feel “like a slave.” The reading was hosted by a nonprofit group that pairs high school girls from disadvantaged backgrounds who want to be writers with women who are authors, journalists, playwrights, poets and editors. The group produces an anthology of student writing each spring, and puts on several public readings.”
My point is simply that whether you are suffering from a mental illness, sexual abuse or spiritual pain everyone needs a mentor if they are ever to learn to DREAM AGAIN.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

BIPOLAR IN KIDS

2008-04-10T05:58:00.000-07:00

Another resource has been added to the resource list at the bottom of this blog. It is the web site for the Federation of Families for Children’s Mental Health. Their site www.ffcmh.org reminds us that “May is Mental Health Month. The National Federation of Families for Children’s Mental Health again declares the first full week in May, May 4 - 10 as National Children’s Mental Health Awareness Week. Chapters and State Organizations across the nation are meeting weekly to share ideas and resources for how to make Children’s Mental Health Awareness Week 2008 the most successful week ever!”
Children’s mental health is on my mind because the other night I watched PBS’ Frontline program “THE MEDICATED CHILD”. You can go to their site and watch the entire show and there are other resources.
Their site is www.pbs.org
Most of the program is a discussion about childhood bipolar disease. Does it exist? If so how do you treat it? Are kids over medicated? What are doctors to do? What are parents to do? The only question really not asked that should have been is what are kids to do?
Christmas 1963 my parents and I returned from the mission field in Zimbabwe (then Rhodesia) and I was enrolled in Berea Foundation School, Berea, Kentucky which was a boarding high school run by Berea College. One of my sisters was attending Berea College and the other was married to a minister of a church about 65 miles away. One day I stole a car (I was not old enough to have a driver’s license but had learned to drive in Africa) and ended up at my sister’s home who was married to the minister. Needless to say she was surprised. I spent a year going to the University of Kentucky Medical Center for both group and individual therapy before going back to the mission field with my parents in 1965. I did not know at the time what was wrong, but now I know I was in mania when I stole the car.
I tell this very personal story simply to say I may not be smart enough to tell you what medications (at that time I was not given any) children should be given or what age, but I believe from my own experiences that bipolar disorder can begin at a very early age. The episode at Berea was not my first and of course it was not my last.
My prayer is that someday we will care enough about children that we will take seriously the task of protecting them from abuse which I wrote about in my last blog and care enough about their mental health that we will invest the dollars needed to discover the truth and stop guessing and using them as guinea pigs.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.ffcmh.org

NATIONAL CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION MONTH

2008-04-07T06:32:00.000-07:00

Recognizing the alarming rate at which children continued to be abused and neglected and the need for innovative programs to prevent child abuse and assist parents and families affected by maltreatment, the U.S. Senate and House of Representatives resolved that the week of June 6-12, 1982, should be designated as the first National Child Abuse Prevention Week. They asked the President to issue a proclamation calling upon Government agencies and the public to observe the week with appropriate programs, ceremonies, and activities.
The following year, April was proclaimed the first National Child Abuse Prevention Month. Since then, child abuse and neglect awareness activities have been promoted across the country during April of each year.
The federal law does not give definitions for all types of abuse such as physical, neglect or emotional abuse, but it does give a definition child sexual abuse.
TITLE 42 - THE PUBLIC HEALTH AND WELFARE/CHAPTER 67 - CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION AND TREATMENT AND ADOPTION REFORM/SUBCHAPTER I - GENERAL PROGRAM: 5106g
(4) the term “sexual abuse” includes—
(A) the employment, use, persuasion, inducement, enticement, or coercion of any child to engage in, or assist any other person to engage in, any sexually explicit conduct or simulation of such conduct for the purpose of producing a visual depiction of such conduct; or
(B) the rape, and in cases of caretaker or inter-familial relationships, statutory rape, molestation, prostitution, or other form of sexual exploitation of children, or incest with children;
As you can see it is not a very full definition. I am aware that each state also have their laws, but I still have to ask the question are our children any better protected in 2008 than they were in the 50’s and 60’s when I was being sexually abused?
I also feel the need to raise a question most people feel uncomfortable with. When I was training as a medic in the military during the Vietnam War, I did my training in Texas. Part of my training was on the burn unit. I was unable to complete my entire rotation there. Working with burn patients was the only thing I found I simply could not do, but I was there long enough to learn the difference between first, second, and third degree burns. Why do I bring this up? Because I think there should be a language for talking about childhood sexual abuse that takes into account the different factors of the experience.
There is a way of talking about the severity of burns or pain. Has your doctor ever asked you to rate your pain on a scale of 1-10? I am not trying to say that a child touched in a sexual way has not suffered abuse. Most of the folks that have been sexually abused from an early age by a family member or someone close to the family and over a long period of time are either locked up on the backward of a state hospital or commits suicide at an early age.
Our ways of coping are different and believe it or not we recognize each other with very few words being exchanged. I had that experience with a lady in Florida and everyone wondered how I knew and why she was drawn to me when she turned away from most people.
I am saying we need a language that addresses the severity, physical pain associated with it and longevity of the sexual abuse along with what coping strategy the person used to endure the ordeal. If one created people to survive then the help needed is certainly different from a person who used another mechanism.
The language may be out there and I have just not been exposed to it. If that is true then will you please tell me where to find it? If it is not then help me develop it. We need a language that reflects the truth not some theory from an ivory tower. I was not abused in an ivory tower. It began in an Appalachian barn.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

STATE HOSPITALS

2008-04-03T05:28:00.000-07:00

The first public meeting I attended in Florida in the early nineties I got in trouble with a segment of the consumer advocates in Broward County. When it was time for public comment I stood and spoke forcefully for the need for a state hospital. I spoke against closing it and using the money for community programs. The phrase “in the community” was the popular and trendy idea to support, but I saw it a little differently. In the community for most of us meant living in isolation and poverty. Alone without much of a support system and besides I thought the person should be asked where they wanted to be.
My point was that if the state said it had a right to lock me up then it had an obligation not just to put me back into the community when it was convenient or cheaper for the state. I should have a say. I was not a very popular person at that meeting and I have found myself in a similar position at other meetings. I am not always on the side of the majority to say the least.
South Florida State Hospital changed from a state run hospital to a private run hospital. Yes they got a new building, but they also got other things. Like more restrictive movement on the grounds for example. A much more authoritarian environment. In my humble opinion a place much less conducive to healing. What a price is being paid by those of us with mental illness for the state to get a new building and spend a few less dollars.
Here in North Carolina Broughton Hospital, the state hospital here in Burke County, is going through some rough spots. They lost more than $1 million in Medicaid and Medicare money a month and are working hard to get it back. It is state run with the culture that comes with a state institution. It is making progress and may have a bright future. Is it needed? Yes.
They removed in from the division that was directly responsible for mental health to the North Carolina Department of Health and Human Services. The other division was in the same department, but now the state hospitals are directly under the Secretary of HHS. Is this a good idea?
In my opinion no. Here again I am running against the current. In this state we have what are called Local Management Entities that control the state money for certain geographic areas. The state hospitals should be under local control. The LME that make up the area served by the hospital should form a governing body to run the state hospital in their area. Funds saved by wisely using the state hospital could be used in the community. Local control always makes more sense than top down control.
Who knows best? The people on the frontlines. Give them the power to make the decisions and you will see better decisions being made. Make sure they include primary consumers and their families on these governing boards and you will see better state hospitals.
How do I know? I saw it work before South Florida State Hospital was turned over to a for profit company to run. In fact one who’s only experience had been running prisons. Let the people closest to the problems solve them. Believe in ordinary people. They will surprise you. They really do know something.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

THANKFUL/Entry for March 28, 2008

2008-03-28T04:03:00.001-07:00

As you can see the next blog will not come out until next Thursday because I am celebrating.
First, I am celebrating the fact that today is my 17th wedding anniversary. Patty has been and still is the best thing that ever happened in my life. I have often said in speeches and meetings across this country that the solution to the problems in the mental health systems in the different states is to find a Patty for every one of us. She is more than I ever hoped for and far more than I probably deserve, but she has chosen to stay with me and for that I am grateful. It has not been easy because it is not easy to be with someone too depressed to get off the couch or so manic they can’t stop. Or a person sexually abused so many times as a child that they find trusting another person almost impossible. I can’t count the times I have tested her love or for that matter my family’s love. If I am this bad will you still love me? How about this bad? Patty has stayed.
Second, I am celebrating a year since my surgery for an abdominal aortic aneurysm. An aortic aneurysm is a weakened and bulging area in the aorta, the major blood vessel that feeds blood to the body. The aorta, about the thickness of a garden hose, runs through the center of your body. Because the aorta is the body's predominant supplier of blood, a ruptured aortic aneurysm can cause life-threatening bleeding. Although you may never have symptoms, finding out you have an aortic aneurysm can be more than unsettling. Each year, approximately 15,000 people die of an abdominal aortic aneurysm in the United States.
I had my surgery on March 28, 2007. Patty said it was not a very good anniversary present. The next morning she heard one of the nurses come in and say something like, “he is still alive” sounding surprised. Yes I made it and the year since I have only had to deal with a couple of minor heart problems and some kidney problems. I feel truly lucky to be alive. They found it while doing a liver scan. Well actually I don’t feel lucky. I feel like God is walking beside me.
Which brings me to my main point. When the sexual abuse started I was only four years old and I cried out for Jesus to rescue me. He did not come. It hurt like hell. When I started getting sick from my bipolar illness I asked to be healed, but it did not happen. I turned away from God and the church. I stopped preaching or even going to church. Then at Patty’s Dad’s death bed I was asked to say a prayer. The moment I said amen he passed on. I felt God in that room for the first time in my life. I had been in Sunday school since I was a baby. I began preaching on the mission field in Africa at 12 years old and was pastor of a church in Kentucky when I was 17, but I felt God for the first time on the hospice unit of the VA hospital in Asheville, NC in May 2006 when Patty’s dad died.
The odd thing is I now know he has been there all along. From the first abuse in the barn, each time I lived on the streets, every time I was locked away on a mental ward and each step I took in life. How do I know it? Because if He had not been I would not be celebrating today. You would not have been reading my blogs. Patty and I would not have had these years together.
Oh yes, He has been there each day, each hour, each minute. Now I know it. Now I feel it. Call it another of my delusions, but this one please don’t try to take away. This delusion I need. He kept me alive all these years for a reason. This is the season of His reason.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

HOW AM I TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE?

2008-03-24T05:56:00.000-07:00

When I went to my first National Alliance on Mental Illness meeting in Asheville, NC in 1988 you heard mostly about folks with Schizophrenia. Then the talk turned to what I call the big three. Schizophrenia, Bipolar disorder and Major Depression. Now you hear more talk about other disorders like Dissociative disorders, Panic disorders and Anxiety disorders along with dual diagnosis meaning a mental illness and substance abuse. Post-Traumatic Stress disorder is also coming to the front of the stage. Partly because of the five year war in Iraq and because we are learning more about it.
I found this interesting article in the Sunday Charlotte Observer. “Dr. John Kelsoe has spent his career trying to identify the biological roots of bipolar disorder. In December, he announced he had discovered several gene mutations closely tied to the disease.
Then Kelsoe, a prominent psychiatric geneticist at the University of California, San Diego, did something provocative for the world of academic medical research: He began selling bipolar genetic tests straight to the public over the Internet last month for $399. ……Kelsoe, 52, acknowledges that bipolar disorder, whose sufferers experience intense mood swings, probably results from a combination of genetic factors and life experiences and that the presence of these gene variations does not at all mean that someone will, in fact, develop the disease. “
I wonder if my wife got a call from me and I was standing on the pier in Santa Monica, California (2,375 from Glen Alpine, NC) and had just put a few thousand dollars on our credit card would I test positive with Dr. Kelsoe’s home bipolar genetic test? Just a thought.
Another article in the Charlotte Observer caught my attention. It says, “Groundbreaking research suggests genes help explain why some people can recover from a traumatic event while others suffer post-traumatic stress disorder.
Though preliminary, the study provides insight into a condition expected to strike increasing numbers of veterans returning from combat in Iraq and Afghanistan, one health expert said.
Researchers found that specific variations in a stress-related gene appeared to be influenced by trauma at a young age -- in this case child abuse. That interaction strongly increased the chances for adult survivors of abuse to develop signs of PTSD.
Among adult survivors of severe child abuse, those with the specific gene variations scored more than twice as high (31) on a scale of post-traumatic stress, compared with those without the variations (13).
The worse the abuse, the stronger the risk in people with those gene variations.
The study of 900 adults is among the first to show that genes can be influenced by outside, nongenetic factors to trigger signs of PTSD. It is the largest of just two reports to show molecular evidence of a genetic influence on PTSD. …….About a quarter of a million Americans will develop PTSD at some point in their lives after being victimized or witnessing violence or other traumatic events. Rates are much higher in war veterans and people living in high-crime areas.
Symptoms can develop long after the event and usually include recurrent terrifying recollections of the trauma. Sufferers often have debilitating anxiety, irritability, insomnia and other signs of stress.”
The truth is that many of us with a serious mental illness also have been abused. Many sexually abused. Many over a long period of time by either a family member or someone close to the family. We are mostly found on the long term wards of state hospitals. Some of us are lucky enough to have pulled ourselves together enough to live in society, but just barely.
When I am struggling I don’t know which is causing me the most trouble. The sexual abuse as a child or the bipolar disorder which started manifesting itself as I grew into adulthood.
Read the symptoms of PTSD and you are looking at the same list they give for hypomania, the stage right before you break into full mania. How am I to tell the difference?
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

SAINT PATRICK'S DAY

2008-03-17T06:42:00.000-07:00

Saint Patrick's Day (Irish: Lá ’le Pádraig or Lá Fhéile Pádraig), colloquially St. Paddy's Day or Paddy's Day, is an annual feast day which celebrates Saint Patrick (circa 385–461 AD), one of the patron saints of Ireland, and is generally celebrated on March 17. In the past, Saint Patrick's Day was celebrated only as a religious holiday. It became a public holiday in 1903, by the Bank Holiday (Ireland) Act 1903, an Act of the United Kingdom Parliament introduced by the Irish MP James O'Mara. O'Mara later introduced the law which required that pubs be closed on 18 March, a provision which was repealed only in the 1970s. The first St. Patrick's Day parade held in the Irish Free State was held in Dublin in 1931 and was reviewed by the then Minister of Defence Desmond Fitzgerald. Although secular celebrations now exist, the holiday remains a religious observance in Ireland, for both the Church of Ireland and Roman Catholic Church. The New York parade has become the largest Saint Patrick's Day parade in the world. In 2006 more than 150,000 marchers participated in it, including bands, firefighters, military and police groups, county associations, emigrant societies, and social and cultural clubs, and it was watched by close to 2 million spectators lining the streets. The parade marches up 5th Avenue in Manhattan and is always led by the U.S. 69th Infantry Regiment. New York politicians - or those running for office - are always found prominently marching in the parade.
Some Time in New York City is John Lennon's third post-Beatles album, and fifth with Yoko Ono, and was released in 1972. Primarily for its distinction as a dual "Lennon & Ono" album and being preceded by a controversial single, Some Time in New York City fared poorly critically and commercially compared to Lennon's previous two albums, John Lennon/Plastic Ono Band and Imagine. On it was a protest song The Luck of the Irish.
Which raises the question is the luck of the Irish good or bad? If we are to believe Bart D. Ehrman, the James A. Gray Distinguished Professor of Religious Studies at UNC Chapel Hill not only do the Irish have bad luck we all do and because we all suffer it proves there is not a God. In a review written for The Charlotte Observer by Rev. James C. Howell, pastor of Myers Park United Methodist Church Ehrman is quoted as writing, "I could no longer reconcile the claims of faith with the facts of life. In particular, I could no longer explain how there can be a good and all-powerful God actively involved with this world, given the state of things. ... Life is a cesspool of misery and suffering."
Ehrman seems to assume nobody ever thought of this before. He noticed the Holocaust, hungry children, Katrina -- and he concluded something titanically brilliant: God has a problem, which is God's failure to deal with suffering, so all that is left to us is to conclude God just plain isn't.”
Rev. Howell in the review comments, “I was shocked by this book, but not because Ehrman rejects God. Ehrman is a very fine scholar, and a task incumbent upon a scholar is to engage the best scholarship written on a subject. Christians have known for 2,000 years that suffering happens, and theologians have grappled with many wise, meaningful approaches to how we believe in a good God in a world where bad things happen. Ehrman seems not to have made himself aware of any of them, or he ridiculously misrepresents various ways we understand the intersection of God and suffering. None of the great theologians who have deftly explored these matters is ever mentioned.”
One of those theologians was C. S. Lewis. The Problem of Pain is a 1940 book by C. S. Lewis, in which he seeks to provide an intellectual Christian response to questions about suffering. The book is a theodicy, an attempt by one Christian layman to reconcile orthodox Christian belief in a loving and omnipotent God with the fact that people suffer, and is not intended to provide comfort to those actually suffering. Some have felt that it is useful to read it together with A Grief Observed, Lewis' reflections on his own experience of severe emotional pain.
On this St. Pat’s day I could deny God because I have a mental illness and was abused as a child and now find my health failing. However, I would have rather lived my life a free man with free will and suffered the natural course of life than have been a robot. God created humankind in His likeness not as computers or puppets. I thank Him each day for my freedom and for His grace and I serve Him of my own free will as was His plan from the beginning of time. Ehrman’s book is titled God’s Problem. God’s only problem is that His creation keeps rejecting His grace.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

ABLE TO DREAM AGAIN

2008-03-14T06:15:00.000-07:00

Sharon Begley writing in the March 17th issue of Newsweek wrote, “When you write about science there is no shortage of topics that incite the wrath of readers.” I may be fixing to do that with this blog, but please stay with me till the end before you dismiss me as a total nut.
She went on to write in the article , “In a bizarre finding, sham surgery of the knee, in which patients got sedation and an incision but no actual procedure, relieved the pain of osteoarthritis better than actual arthroscopy—and produced an equal improvement in joint function, scientists reported in 2002. And last month an analysis of clinical trials of a range of antidepressants found that, except in the most severe cases, placebos lifted the black cloud as well as meds did. To be sure, no study is perfect. In the antidepressant one, the placebo might not have looked as effective if it had been compared with the drug that worked best for each patient, rather than with the one that happened to be chosen for the clinical trial. (Some patients respond better to Paxil, some to Effexor or others, for reasons that remain murky.) But the fact remains that placebos are at least somewhat effective and sometimes very effective for some patients. Rather than railing against that finding or pretending it doesn't exist, what we should be doing is learning how brain activity that corresponds to the expectation of cure translates into clinical improvement. As Dan Ariely of Duke University says, "It's not that medicines are crummy, but that the placebo effect is so powerful."
The consumer movement and the recovery concept as a whole have been saying for years that expectations play a key role in the whole process. The fight for a bio-psycho-social-spiritual model or way of seeing the whole person is to get away from labels and low expectations and into the realm of hope and being able to dream again.
The medications I am on now are causing trouble with my kidneys. The ones before that my liver. Now they are trying to figure out what medication to use to control my bipolar illness. I am going from one doctor to another. There is not a team working with me. There is no such thing as a bio-psycho-social-spiritual specialist or a bio-psycho-social-spiritualist team that I am aware of anywhere. Why not?
If the whole person needs to be treated where is the team? Where can we go? I was sitting in a planning session the other night here in North Carolina and the subject of barriers to treatment came up. I said I thought stigma was a major barrier. A member of NAMI said a great deal of progress had been made in that area. My reply was that she must not have filled out a form at a doctor’s office lately and that asked what meds you were taking and listed a bunch of psych meds. I am and have been since 1989 a member of NAMI. I am proud of the work they have done, but the fact remains stigma is well and alive for all of us with a mental illness in this country and to think anything else is simply being an ostrich with your head buried in the sand.
Our only true hope in my humble opinion is when more folks buy into the concept of the bio-psycho-social-spiritual concept and recovery, hope and being able to dream again are the norms. Medications play a role, but they can’t hug you. They can’t listen to you. They can’t love you. They can’t dream with you. They can’t ……….
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

ONLY SEE THE TAIL

2008-03-10T09:27:00.000-07:00

Although I got replies to my last blog, I did not get anyone to take a stab at answering the question about the first use of the word/words bio-psycho-social-spiritual. Nevertheless let’s try to define at least what I mean when I use it by coming up with examples.
I consider when I have a manic episode caused by my bipolar illness that I am dealing with a bio or biological phenomenon. Since I consider my bipolar disorder a brain disease, I put it in the bio category. That is not to say that the other three don’t influence or play any part in the manic episode, but the main factor is a malfunctioning body part we call the brain.
When I am depressed it is a bit more complicated. It can be bio, but it can also be mainly psychological. This is sometimes referred to as situational depression. How can I tell the difference? Certainly not by how I feel. However, if I am not so depressed that I can’t do it I can think back to see if something happened that started it. If I can’t identify a reason for it starting then I assume I am in what is commonly referred to as clinically depression which means it is caused by my biological disorder called bipolar. Now to be sure this is not an easy thing to figure out and at times I am both depressed and manic.
A social situation that those of us with a mental illness and our families are very familiar with is stigma. Another one that most of my fellow sojourners deal with is poverty. You put stigma with poverty and you have created a social crisis for the individual.
To understand spirituality does not require you to believe in a soul or God or a life after this one. Let me clearly state I do believe that we have souls which live for eternity and that God created us and all we see around us. However, to get the meaning of the fourth word you do not have to believe as I do. Spirituality does not mean a church or a certain dogma. It means we all have an inner life and much of how well we do on our individual recovery journeys depends on how we learn to deal with our inner life.
For example during a manic episode my actions are more determined by what is deep inside me than from any psychological insights or social morals. My mind is racing and I am acting faster than facts can keep up with. You might say I have to hope my guts will keep the ship on course. From deep within is my only hope.
Now I believe that deep within me is the Creator’s Spirit helping me keep this manic force on some sort of course. You may have a different belief about how you get the help you need when the world seems to over take you, but whatever the view most folks still say they feel it deep inside themselves. In their souls.
We will never get to the place that we can truly be useful to others on their recovery journey until we see them in their complex state as all humans are. We live in a complex yet fragile universe among people who are both complex and fragile. Brave and weak. How would one ever know how majestic an elephant was if they could only see the tail?
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

US OR THEMSELVES?

2008-03-06T14:34:00.000-08:00

What do you believe Ed? I ask myself that question about a year ago as I found myself facing a serious surgery to repair an abdominal aorta aneurysm. As I listen to the political rhetoric this year, I ask myself the same question. As I read about the mental health reforms that were begun in this state (North Carolina) in 2001, again I have to ask myself what I believe.
It is important to have a solid foundation of beliefs by which you test the assertions of any idea. If you don’t have these concrete principles or beliefs then you can be blown around like tumbleweed on the desert landscape.
At a news conference this week North Carolina’s governor said, “We had our concerns about the reform of 2001. We believed that it was a privatization that went too far too quickly.” (THE NEWS & OBSERVER)
I think this is 2008 and if I had thought something was wrong in 2001 I might have started sooner saying so. The governor sounded like he has been helpless over these past years to stop the train wreck. If that is true then why would anyone agree to give his appointed head of the Department of Health and Human Services more power?
THE NEWS & OBERVER put it this way, “ Gov. Mike Easley called on state legislators Tuesday to give his administration more authority to fix the state's troubled mental health system. Though he said he was not attempting to lay blame for the problems, the governor repeatedly pointed to the General Assembly and local mental health agencies as those primarily responsible for bungling the 2001 reform plan. Easley again contended that his administration "vigorously" opposed the plan from the start -- a version of history that does not square with the written record or the statements of the bill's primary sponsor. Implemented by the Easley administration over the past six years, the reforms dismantled an established system of county-run mental health offices and sought to pay businesses to do the work. It also sought to reduce the size of the state's four psychiatric hospitals in favor of more treatment in the community. “
So what are some basic building blocks one might look for in a plan or system to ascertain if it is built on a solid foundation?
1) Is the system First-Person? One of the first things that hit me head on when I returned to North Carolina after being away for more than a decade was that primary consumers are generally included only on advisory committees or in advisory roles, but not in the real decision making process other than maybe a token position. The other thing that amazed me was that the individual plans were not really driven by the person, but everybody under the sun was asked their opinion about what the person ought to do. Looking at these two facts alone one can tell the decision making process is not First-Person or consumer driven and nor are the service plans.
2) How many independent consumer run programs are operating in the state? The answer to this question gives you some idea to what degree the power structure believes in the recovery movement. Count the number of independent drop-in centers, safe houses, crisis services and other consumer run programs and you will know if they believe in us or themselves.
It is important what you come to the table believing. My fear is that there are few people at the table here in North Carolina who truly believes in us.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

RANDOM THOUGHTS/ MARCH 3

2008-03-03T05:55:00.000-08:00

John Muir (April 21, 1838 – December 24, 1914) was one of the first modern preservationists. His letters, essays, and books telling of his adventures in nature, and wildlife, especially in the Sierra Nevada Mountains of California, were read by millions and are still popular today. His direct activism helped to save the Yosemite Valley and other wilderness areas. The Sierra Club, which he founded, is now one of the most important conservation organizations in the United States. His writings and philosophy strongly influenced the formation of the modern environmental movement.
John Muir once said everyone needs, “places to play in and pray in where nature may heal and cheer and give strength to body and soul alike.” I was in Eastern Kentucky last week to attend the funeral of my Aunt (mother’s side of family) and I certainly needed the healing power of God’s creation. I drove through Western North Carolina, Eastern Tennessee and Eastern Kentucky. The reason for the trip may not have been pleasant, but the trip going up was God’s finest creation of nature. Coming back to Glen Alpine, I was in snow most of the way which lends a beauty to the landscape all its own. Thank God for the beauty he has provided us to live upon.
****************************
The cover of NEWSWEEK dated March 3, 2008 has these words, “The Hunt for an Addiction Vaccine.” In the article we find these words, “In the current jargon of the recovery movement, addiction to alcohol, drugs or nicotine is a ‘bio-psycho-social-spiritual disorder’, a phrase that seems to have been invented by the treatment industry to emphasize how complex the problem is and how much more funding it deserves.”
I have tried to find the origin of the word or its first use, but can’t. I know I used it first in 1988 in relationship to my own mental illness and at that time I had not read it anywhere else. If any of you know the beginnings of this word please let me know. I know I took bio-psycho-social and added social, but I would like to know where it was first being used.
***************************************
On the editorial page of THE CHARLOTTE OBSERVER this past Sunday there was an editorial titled RETHINKING REFORM speaking of the mental health system here in North Carolina. Most important fact in it is the fact we are spending $16.80 per capita on mental health care. The national average stated in this editorial is $91.12 per capita. You are argue about the details of reform, but one thing for sure if you don’t fund it you have made sure it will fail before it gets off the ground.
**************************************
On the front page of the same paper was a story about the deaths in our state hospitals here in North Carolina. “Most died of natural causes, but a News & Observer investigation shows that 82 of those patients died under circumstances that raise questions: homicides, suicides, accidents, inadequate treatment or mistakes.
Family members of the deceased, who have a legal right to receive complete information about how their loved ones died, often are not told the full details. State reviews, death certificates and autopsy reports confirm the death toll. Of the 82 deaths that are questionable, 20 who died were above the age of 65. A review of conditions in North Carolina's state mental hospitals by the U.S. Department of Justice in 2004 concluded that employees routinely violated patients' civil rights. The inappropriate use of physical restraints and seclusion were cited as major problems, as were inadequate mental-health treatment, unsafe building conditions and the failure to ensure the reasonable safety of patients."
******************************************
We need to know that someone cares. I guess that is why I turn to faith communities and say to them it is time to embrace us. To open your arms. To seek us out and let us know you love us and want us among you. It is time to stop sitting safely in the pew and boldly reach out your hand and heart open to those of us with broken brains and shattered souls.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

WHAT SYSTEM?

2008-02-22T06:44:00.001-08:00

In an article in the Raleigh, NC News & Observer dated February 17th we find this statement. “We don't have a system that recognizes or identifies a crisis at a stage where we can give them services until it becomes a problem," said Sen. Ellie Kinnaird, a Democrat from Carrboro on state legislative judicial committees. "We've got to change the whole thing.”
The root meaning of system is a regularly interacting or interdependent group of items forming a unified whole. As the commercial asked years ago “where is the beef?” we can ask today “Where is the mental health system?”.
The above quote is from an article telling about the death of a young woman in one of our prisons here in North Carolina. Speaking of her the article says, “ The mental health diagnoses were long and complicated. Bipolar disorder, depressive disorder, paranoid schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, alcohol abuse, cocaine abuse and borderline and antisocial personality traits. “
It also says, “Officials with the N.C. Correctional Institution for Women say Bouleris wrapped a sheet around her neck and hanged herself from her prison bed, leaving a family wracked with grief, guilt and haunting questions.”
It is not unusual to get a number of different psychiatric labels if you come in contact with the system or non-system over a number of years. That is my own experience. I have gone from paranoid schizophrenia to bipolar disorder since 1964 until now and I am leaving out a number of others simply because I can’t remember them. One point it makes is that making a psychiatric diagnosis is not a science.
However, the death of this young lady makes a far greater point. The lack of a system in this state and certainly an apparent lack of forensic services. This brings me to a point I have made before. We needed someone in charge with experience. We are people not natural resources.
In the same article we read, “Kidder [the mother] has heard from friends and relatives of inmates still behind bars, prisoners too fearful of retribution to risk corresponding on their own. They have relayed that Bouleris was very open about her suicide plans. They say the guards did not check on her at the 6 a.m. shift change on Jan. 26, the day she was found dead at 8:30 a.m.
"This just totally changed the grieving process," Kidder said. "Now I'm angry."
Why, Kidder wonders, were the suicide threats not taken more seriously?
"If she's telling people she's suicidal, you just can't ignore this," Kidder said. "Even if she cried 'wolf' 100 times, guess what -- it's time 101, you still listen."
Keith Acree, a spokesman for the state Department of Correction, said the State Bureau of Investigation was looking into the incident, standard procedure.
The autopsy report was not complete last week, according to Chief Medical Examiner John Butts, but his office is investigating the death as an apparent suicide.
State prison officials, too, are examining their actions, Acree said, but their findings will become part of Bouleris' inmate files and not available for public scrutiny.”
Consumers and family members can no longer tolerate this non-system that shatters souls and leaves broken brains feeling helpless. What System I ask?
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

WE WILL HAVE WON

2008-02-18T05:04:00.001-08:00

One of the issues I worked on while I was in south Florida was the relationship between primary care services and mental health services. I have always had a problem getting good health care as soon as the provider asked what medications I was presently taking. It seems like the list of psych meds I take deafens the medical doctors’ ears. Studies support that we die at an earlier age than folks without a mental illness and I don’t think all of it can be contributed to our bad habits which they tell me research shows we have at a higher rate than chronically normal people do. The truth is we get poorer health care than the average person in this country.
In today’s New York Times in a piece by Kevin Sack we learn about another study. “A nationwide study has found that the uninsured and those covered by Medicaid are more likely than those with private insurance to receive a diagnosis of cancer in late stages, often diminishing their chances of survival.”
When I moved here to Morganton, NC I picked a local physician who was just starting her practice. Soon after seeing her a piece appeared in the paper that she had just successfully completed the Certification Examination of The American Board of Family Medicine. I was surprised to find out that the ABFM is one of 24 member boards of the American Board of Medical Specialties and is the second largest. However, my biggest surprise was what the exam covered. It covers (but not limited to) the disciplines of the specialties of adult medicine, care of newborns, infants, children, adolescents, maternity and gynecological care, community medicine, care of the older patient, human behavior, care of the surgical patient and mental health.
When I went to see her the first time I had to take the list of the meds I was on just like all the other times I had seen a new doctor. I have kidney and heart problems. I had had surgery to repair an abdominal aortic aneurysm in March 2007 which involves removing the damaged section of the aorta and replacing it with a synthetic tube (graft), which is sewn into place. This procedure requires open-abdominal surgery involving a large incision and a lengthy recover time. An aortic aneurysm is a weakened and bulging area in the aorta, the major blood vessel that feeds blood to the body. The aorta, about the thickness of a garden hose, runs through the center of your body. Because the aorta is the body's predominant supplier of blood, a ruptured aortic aneurysm can cause life-threatening bleeding. I was lucky (or God was not done with me) that while doing an ultrasound of my liver the tech saw the aneurysm. My point is I am not the easiest case she ever had walk through her door either medically or personality wise, but because of her training and because of the person she is she has done an excellent job with a difficult patient. I don’t make a good patient.
What I am using all these words to say is that if I can be provided good medical care then any of us can. Just before this past Christmas I was awaken from a deep sleep with severe chest pains. I sat in my office almost hoping it was my time to go because I have been suicidal since I was sexually abused at four years old and it did not stop then. My bipolar illness has not done wonders for the suicidal thoughts either. Finally, I woke Patty and off to the hospital I went by ambulance with them popping nitro pills in my mouth. I was in the emergency room until about noon waiting on a bed. Through a mix up the cardiologist never got called, but even though my doctor does not see patients in the hospital (they have hospital doctors) she came by. She did not stand by the bed. She sat in a chair like she was visiting me. They wanted me to have a heart catheterization, but when things got so confusing I told Patty to either take me home (it was almost midnight) or I was just going to the street. I have not had the catheterization yet, but my physician is still working with me. I may be the most distrusting patient on earth, but she has not thrown me away.
I tell you this story because I want you to dream of the day when all my fellow sojourners will be treated by a physician with the same respect I am by her. She sees me as a person. The key to all of this folks is when the day comes we see ourselves as a person. When the world sees us as fully human too and not just as a diagnosis, we will have really won.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

HARDER ON MY FATHER

2008-02-14T03:42:00.000-08:00

The word love has so many meanings that it has almost become meaningless. When someone tells you that they love you what are they saying? Really, you don’t know until you see how they act towards you. I can tell my wife a hundred times that I love her, but it is my actions that tell the real story. One of my two sisters said to me once, “Your love is like having money in the bank that you can’t ever withdraw when you need it.”
This blog is not about romantic love. It is about loving a person with a mental illness. It is about being a family member of a person with a mental illness and loving them while feeling helpless.
My thoughts have gone to my father many times over the past few weeks. He was raised in a family in the eastern part of Kentucky and they were poor to say the least. A home without warmth from the winter cold and the bitter realities of growing up. He never learned how to show the love he felt. Mom never got what she needed from him for her heart. He simply did not know how.
When faced with a son who had a mental illness he did not know what to do. I was the youngest of his three children and my two sisters had basically gone along with the program. Now he was faced with a problem he did not understand. A problem child. Even with all his education and being a teacher and school principal he had not faced a kid like me. He probably had, but they had most likely simply dropped out or gone away. I did not go away. I was his problem because I was his kid.
My illness was harder on my father than it was on me. My father suffered more than I did about my mental illness. I got breaks. I would get so sick I did not care. My father always cared. So did the rest of the people who loved me. So does my wife today. Sometimes still my illness is harder on my wife than me.
He died in 1989 without ever seeing me doing as well as I am now. Don’t get me wrong the road is still full of potholes. Just ask my wife, but I have put together a fairly good dozen or so years. I just hope those folks who loved me that have already gone on ahead are looking back on this day we celebrate love and saying, “The old guy is doing better.”
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

PRIVATE HELL

2008-02-11T07:04:00.000-08:00

Reynolds Price, James B. Duke Professor of English at Duke University and a writer of fiction, poetry, memoirs, essays and plays, was honored for 50 years of teaching at Duke University with a celebration Jan. 31-Feb. 2. When Price first received the letter offering him a teaching job at Duke, it warned that the position was a three-year appointment with no chance of being extended. “That seemed a little discouraging, but I thought, ‘Well, three years is three years,’” Price said. During those three years, he wrote his first novel and was asked to stay on. “I’ve been here ever since.” A native of North Carolina and a 1955 summa cum laude graduate of Duke, Price was a Rhodes Scholar and studied in Oxford, England, with W.H. Auden and Lord David Cecil. He returned to the United States and began teaching at Duke in 1958.
In his book Roxanna Slade is the following paragraph from the viewpoint of his main character Roxanna, “Whatever you believed, whoever you were in the 1940’s where I lived, medical science had no cure for you-just the eventually exasperated faces of however many doctors you saw. Your church had very little more to offer except to say ‘Most everybody will be bad off as you before they die.” They also had a postscript ‘Don’t kill yourself. You’ll go straight to Hell”-and all that when you were sitting by the absolute instant in a private Hell you’d gladly have swapped for Satan’s worst grill.”
For anybody who has ever gone through a deep depression those words written by Reynolds have a powerful ring of truth to them. Being a person with a diagnosis of a bipolar disorder I have experienced some extreme lows when getting out of bed or off the couch was more than I could do. Back in the 60’s when my illness began to manifest itself my family was blamed for raising such an uncontrollable child. Later as I grew older the blame shifted to me and I was blamed for being a lazy and undisciplined person.
One never fully recovers from the blame and shame directed at them for an illness they did not ask for nor can they help having. I still fight to this very day to see myself as fully human and a true person in my own right.
The church I grew up in and that my parents were missionaries in was little help in this struggle for self. The sexual abuse I endured as a child further eroded any concept of self I may have had. While the meds I take help control the bipolar disorder I have, the struggle for self can not be found in a bottle of pills.
This struggle is a spiritual journey which is why it is so important that we be seen as bio-psycho-social-spiritual beings and not simply as a diagnosis. It is why it is so important that the faith communities reach out to those of us who have been burned to our very soul by the fire of rejection, dismissal and ignorance about us.
The first thing everyone needs to remember is that every disabled person is first and foremost a person. Treating them any different than that only increases their private hell. You can help lift the burdens if you are willing to walk along beside the person. Not trying to lead. Not trying to push. Simply being there. Simply saying by your presence that you think the person is precious. With time the person will begin to see themselves as precious too and their private hell will slowly melt away as snow does when spring dawns.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org

HOW ARE YOU SEEN?

2008-02-07T06:05:00.000-08:00

How do others see you? Is that important to your advocacy? Is it important in your daily life?
We are finding out in the race for the presidency that folks may be casting their votes more from their gut feelings than from decisions based on beliefs about policies. In fact, how we feel about the person presenting the idea or product often influences our decisions on whether we decide to agree with it or buy it.
We may consider ourselves rational beings, but really genetics, peer pressure, and our emotions probably have more to do with our daily decision making than reason does. What does this have to do with being an advocate for persons with a mental illness? Everything.
First, it influences how you advocate. Some people see me like a bull in a china shop while others have grown to understand where I am coming from, but the truth is at times I make a very poor first impression. I have what some of my friends refer to as a “strong personality” (and they think they are being kind to use those words) and it can be abrasive if I am upset with what I consider to be an injustice. When I am upset I make a poor advocate.
Second, what you advocate for matters. Are you simply advocating your own ideas or have you been listening to the folks you are advocating for/with? In the early 90’s I was on a trip from Fort Lauderdale to Philadelphia with a group of mental health professionals to look at team style case management. In one of the meetings there I made a statement based on what I thought was the consumer perspective. One of the female mental health professionals from Philadelphia quickly pointed out that mental health consumers were not a monolithic group and that I could not speak for all of them anymore than she could speak for all women. In my defense I was not trying to, but her point was valid and still is.
You can have the most important message in the world, but if your own personality and attitude make you unbearable to be around or to listen to you will fail at getting your message across. Many times I may have been right, but I have failed in getting myself heard because I came across as too arrogant or too forcefully. People do not like to be told they are wrong, but they may be willing to listen if approached in the right way.
It doesn’t matter that I don’t feel the way others seem to view me. I don’t feel superior. I don’t think I am better than any other human on the face of this planet. I don’t believe I am always right, but if others see me that way it does not matter how I truly feel. It matters how I am seen.
Since I care deeply about the issues that impact the lives of people like me who live daily with a mental illness, I work on coming across with the proper attitude. I guess I mostly fail, but sometimes I succeed. When I do I get more accomplished for the folks and issues I care deeply about.
I believe in a consumer driven mental health system with major input from primary consumers and family members. I believe in service plans being driven by the dreams, desires and hopes of the individuals being served. The opinions of others are totally secondary including the mental health professionals working with the individuals. I am much more likely to follow a plan I designed headed toward a direction I decided than any plan that was put together where my input was only a part of the plan. I believe if the state decides it has the right to lock me up in a hospital for my own good or the good of others then when I am released it has a moral obligation to serve me by meeting all my needs till I no longer need the state. I believe that the state can not kill me by improper restraining me while I am in their custody without being charged with a crime.
The above beliefs sometimes cause me to get in trouble. I am not always meek and mild when I see these beliefs violated. However, it stands in my way of being a good advocate. It matters how you are seen. How are you seen?
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org

HOPE & TRUST

2008-02-04T09:32:00.000-08:00

Not more than a dozen miles by foot (longer if you were traveling by motor vehicle) from the mission station I grew up on in Zimbabwe, Africa was the village of the local witch doctor. He had a major practice with people coming from miles around to consult with him about their aliments, but when one of his seven wives or thirty-three children needed medical attention he would send them to our mission hospital which was the second largest in Africa south of the equator. His belief in his own practices was not strong enough to risk the lives of the people in his family he loved.
A special issue of Psychiatric Services just came out with most of the issue dedicated to the discussion of mental illness and violence. When I finished reading about the studies and the conclusions that were drawn, I wondered if these folks would send their loved ones to these psychologists and psychiatrists or would they be like the witch doctor and hunt for another place to send the folks they loved.
The mental health consumer movement is as fragmented as any movement in history. There is the radical wing who deny the existence of a biological based brain disease with symptoms that get diagnosed as a mental illness. There is the conservative wing who agree that forced treatment including community forced treatment is OK because after all the person does not know or recognize they are ill. Then there are all the shades in between.
I have found a hard time finding a home. I believe we are bio-psycho-social-spiritual beings and that nothing is as simple as having a single influence. I don’t believe that my mental illness or anyone’s will ever be cured simply because they locate the correct gene that causes it and find a method to disarm the effects of that gene. We are much too complicated for that.
I am not welcome in the radical consumer movement because I know there are brain disorders because I have bipolar disorder. I am not welcome in the conservative consumer movement because I do not believe in forced or coerced treatment.
In the February 1, 2008 issue of Psychiatric News one article and author in the special issue of Psychiatric Services is summarized this way, “But the article by Jeffrey Swanson, Ph.D., pointed out that the accuracy of even the best such screening test is substantially below what would be considered acceptable in other areas of medicine, such as oncology.” He was speaking of being able to predict violence in a person with a mental illness which is criteria used for forced treatment.
My point is simple. Psychiatry is not Voodoo in my opinion, but neither is it one of the true hard sciences. It is still an art based on the ability to listen and truly hear what the other person is saying.
The deafness of the system and some practitioners is what makes some of us fear opening up and telling the truth when we visit our providers. Whatever stand you take, you must admit the best and most reliable information still is the information we provide the mental health professionals working with us. If we fear you for whatever reason, then your information will not as good. We may simple lie to protect ourselves or leave out important facts. You may get some truth, but not the whole picture.
The winning combination is still hope and trust. Think about what produces that and what destroys or eats away at it.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

PERSONAL ADVOCACY

2008-01-31T05:25:00.000-08:00

First, let me apologize for not getting a blog out this past Monday. I have not been feeling well, but I still should have gotten the job done. I feel a responsibility to write and post this blog twice a week (Mondays & Thursdays) because some of my readers have written and expressed that it is meaningful to them. It also gives meaning to my life because it brings more purpose to it. So again let me say to those of you who I let down that I am sorry. Now on to the subject.
There are as many definitions of advocacy as there are advocates. I am going to try in this blog to tell you some of my thoughts on the subject. As I have written in this blog before my first efforts at advocacy for persons like me with a mental illness was with the Christian community. Having grown up as a minister’s and missionaries’ kid I went to the people I knew best to ask them to reach out to those of us with a mental illness. My efforts were not all that rewarding. Yes, I became the National Co-Chair of the Religious Outreach Network for NAMI (which NAMI later disbanded) and had some other successes like getting articles in religious publications, but overall the church was not all that responsive.
My next move was in 1989 to help form Novastar Opportunities for the Mentally Ill, Inc. which Project Dream Again is a division of. It was formed here in NC and is now back in NC, but for most of its working life it was in Florida. I am President of Novastar which is a small nonprofit funded by the sale of my book, folks personal gifts to it, speaking on the rare occasion I accept payment, and from my wife’s and my own funds. I am telling you this not to brag, but rather to make the point that Novastar nor Project Dream Again has ever taken any federal, state, county, or city funds. It has run a drop-in center on the grounds of South Florida State Hospital without any public money, and it also helped get two consumer run drop-in centers state funded in Broward County, FL.
My wife, Patty, left Project Dream Again (Novastar) and went to work first for Broward County on a team working with people in the state hospital then she went to work for the Advocacy Center as monitor for the lawsuit because of the conditions at South Florida State Hospital. She later became the Director PAIMI (Protection and Advocacy for Individuals with Mentally Illness) for the state of Florida. I love my wife, but I am not fond of the PAIMI across the country. Why? Because IT MATTERS WHO FUNDS YOU.
That is why I made the point I did about Novastar and where it gets the little money it has to run on. My grandfather use to ask me, “Have you ever heard of a preacher saying he felt God was leading him or calling him to go to a smaller church with less pay?” Folks, there are always strings. The only way to have an independent consumer voice is to build a grassroots organization independent from the power structure financed by our own pennies.
Let me talk straight for a minute. Since coming back to this state, I have offered to work with NAMI-NC whose board I served on in the late 80’s, but they don’t seem to need any help. I offered my help to the new Advocacy Center in this state, but they don’t seem to need any help either. In fact, they don’t even answer my letters. Neither the Department nor the local LME (local funding source for those of you out of NC) answer letters. To find out that North Carolina feels like a deep freeze to consumer input is a shock to me. My delusional thinking was that North Carolina would be far ahead of Florida in accepting us as part of the decision making process, but the fact is the Sunshine state shines on this issue.
If you think I am taking it personally, you are wrong. I can look at the system and tell no one has been listening to us. I can read the Person-Centered Manual and know and tell no one is listening to us. This isn’t about the fact that Ed isn’t being heard. This is about the fact that the consumer being served is not being listened to. A consumer driven system does not look like the one you are looking at in North Carolina. It is that simple.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org

LARGER and LARGER CIRCLES

2008-01-24T04:50:00.000-08:00

In The New York Times (Sunday, January 13, 2008) Steven Pinker, Johnstone Family Professor of Psychology at Harvard University wrote, “the core of this idea — the interchangeability of perspectives — keeps reappearing in history’s best-thought-through moral philosophies, including the Golden Rule (itself discovered many times); Spinoza’s Viewpoint of Eternity; the Social Contract of Hobbes, Rousseau and Locke; Kant’s Categorical Imperative; and Rawls’s Veil of Ignorance. It also underlies Peter Singer’s theory of the Expanding Circle — the optimistic proposal that our moral sense, though shaped by evolution to overvalue self, kin and clan, can propel us on a path of moral progress, as our reasoning forces us to generalize it to larger and larger circles of sentient beings.”
If you had to sum my father up in one word it would be teacher. I have written in this blog before that he was a minister, missionary, educator, school principal, and started and ran a teachers’ training college on the mission in Zimbabwe (then Rhodesia). He always said if you knew your subject well enough you could put it in terms anyone could understand. I am going to make an attempt to explain “interchangeability of perspectives”. Professor Pinker of Harvard considers it a big idea and so does The New York Times.
Professor Pinker links it to Jesus with the Golden Rule, Spinoza, Hobbes, Rousseau, Locke, Kant, Rawls, and Singer.
Let me see if we can put this in words I can understand. Can I see your side of things? Have I walked in your shoes? Have I tried to understand it from your way of thinking? Am I treating you as I would want you to treat me?
Now don’t get me wrong. It is not about agreeing with the other person if you think they are wrong or doing something you know is wrong just to fit in. This is not a one size fits all philosophy. This is not anything goes.
Some of the philosophies that Professor Pinker lumps together don’t blend so well. They would make a very lumpy cake if all of them were used as ingredients for the same cake.
However, if you stay with the basic point of always trying to see the other person as a person and their perspective and ideas then progress towards peace and understanding can be made. The truth is you can’t be very helpful to folks you are fighting with.
We just celebrated Martin Luther King Jr.’s birthday this past Monday, but the day before this country was the most segregated it is anytime during the week. Sunday morning during church time. Do we still blame the rape victim? Try being a male victim of childhood sexual abuse and talk about it on a construction site where you work. My point is we don’t very often try to see the world through the eyes of the other person.
There is a debate going on about where we get our moral instincts come from. Professor Pinker wrote, “Putting God in charge of morality is one way to solve the problem of course, but Plato made short work of it 2,400 years ago.” Did Jesus put it back on the table 2,000 years ago?
It does not matter if you come from the same faith community as I do or belong to no faith community, but it does matter how you view the folks you share this planet with. It matters whether you are drawing smaller and smaller circles until it is only you in the circle or if you are drawing larger and larger circles until we are all in your circle including those of us with disabilities which before you may have seen as flawed. My prayer is that you are building larger and larger circles.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

BUT NOT US

2008-01-21T04:26:00.000-08:00

{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
NEXT BLOG COMING Thursday, January 24, 2008
BUT NOT US /January 21, 2008
Yesterday’s Sunday edition of The News Herald had a front page article with the title “One Solution to Fixing Mental Health May be the Faith Community”. It was written by Sharon McBrayer and was a long piece with a front page picture to draw attention to it. It started by telling the horrible struggles of one family here in western North Carolina trying to get services from our mental health system. Then it went on by quoting from a psychologist the paper said had worked in a number of states and was now working in Florida. He is quoted as saying, “I haven’t worked in a state yet that didn’t have a broken system.”
One of the things that jumps out at you is that this psychologist says, “I think the faith-based community can play an integral part” and the writer of the article goes on to say, “He (speaking of the psychologist) believes there are federal dollars to fund what he’s talking about.” Reality check here folks. Once you take federal or state dollars the strings attached soon cut off the air that gives you the ability to share your faith.
The article then goes on to describe a local counseling center started by the First Baptist Church of Morganton, NC and is now helped by other churches including First Presbyterian and First Methodist. The center also accepts insurance.
The center’s coordinator explained they “don’t have a physician so they can’t serve those with more serious issues such as bipolar or schizophrenia.”
Everybody else with mental health issues, but not us. Who is us? Those of us with a serious mental illness. Where do we go? To a clinic funded by the state and federal government or if we a lucky by private insurance until we max out the limits.
Others, but not us. How often have those of us with a serious mental illness heard that? I used as a forward to my book When Even the Devil Deserts You a piece written by my father, (educator, missionary, minister) before his death in 1989 in which he wrote, “We experienced great disappointment and frustration that our child with outstanding ability was unable to cope in work or school. It was difficult during the earlier years of his illness to differentiate between his mental illness and adolescent behavior. We felt that some of our friends and colleagues did not accept us in the usual manner because of our son’s behavior, that they considered us less respectable because of a non-conforming member of the family. The mentally ill and their families have a special need for people to befriend them, not in sympathy but in understanding and support.”
[The book can be ordered at www.projectdreamagain.com]
The point here is that faith communities do have a role to play. To reach out to us and our families not try to replace the government or private insurance. Why do I say that? The biggest reason is that the majority of us have trust issues with mental health professionals if we have been in the system very long. Do faith communities want to take on the baggage of the mental health community?
Second, the faith community has a job they know how to do. We need it just like any other person does. We don’t need special treatment. We just need not to be turned away at the door or ignored.
What I am trying to say here is don’t make special programs for us, but rather simply make us feel special by including us in your regular programs. I am thankful I now believe our Creator does!
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

FOOTPRINTS of HIS SON

2008-01-17T01:39:00.001-08:00

{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
NEXT BLOG COMING Monday, January 21, 2008
FOOTPRINTS of HIS SON /January 17, 2008
It is three in the morning here in Glen Alpine, North Carolina and it is snowing outside. Everything is turning white. How I wish my insides were as white as the outside looks right now, but they are not. Lawrence Wright, a Texan, is the author of the book Saints & Sinners. He also wrote City Children, Country Summer: A Story of Ghetto Children Among the Amish.
I often ask myself am I a saint or a sinner? Good or bad? Growing up with a father who was a minister, missionary, and high school principal among other teaching and educational positions and having a mother who was a school teacher (they are both deceased) does not allow one the luxury of avoiding the question. So I am forced to try to answer the question in some fashion. Let me tell you about three men I wish I was more like in some ways. You may be surprised because they are not very famous, but they are my trifecta.
First, my father Lester J. Cooper (1919-1989) not because he was a minister or missionary or educator, but because he taught me how to learn, to love philosophy, and he loved the dirt. When we got to the mission field in 1960 conditions in southern Africa were dangerous for people of my skin color. Since I am white it was decided that I would have to stay on the mission station 100 miles from the nearest town and that the missionaries would teach me. The other missionary kids seemed to do fine, but I was a problem so Dad taught me. The main thing he taught me was how to learn, and a byproduct of that was a love for philosophy. He grew up in the hills of Kentucky and had dirt in his veins. He had a garden, fruit trees, and grape vines etc. on his little lot in College Park, GA. Until he was no longer able just before his death.
Second, is Will Davis Campbell who was a major supporter of the Civil Rights movement in Mississippi. Born July 18, 1924, in Amite County, Mississippi, Campbell grew up in Liberty, Mississippi — a town name fitting for what Campbell wanted to find through his work as a Civil Rights activist and a preacher. Campbell earned his A.B. at Wake Forest College and a B.D. from Yale. He was a Baptist preacher in Taylor, Louisiana, for two years before taking the position of Director of Religious Life at the University of Mississippi from 1954 to 1956. Forced to leave the university because of his ardent Civil Rights participation, Campbell served on the National Council of Churches in New York as a race relations consultant. Campbell worked closely with the Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr., John Lewis, and Andrew Young towards bettering race relations. Today, he continues his pursuit of spiritual and racial liberty as a pastor in Tennessee. Campbell's Brother to a Dragonfly earned him the Lillian Smith Prize, the Christopher Award, and a National Book Award nomination. The Glad River won a first-place award from the Friends of American Writers in 1982. His works have also won a Lyndhurst Prize and an Alex Haley Award.
Third, is Don West (1906-1992) In a book review written by Rachel Rubin this native of the North Georgia mountains who worked in in the mountains of North Carolina, Tennessee, Kentucky and West Virginia is described by her like this, “West is widely viewed as one of the most compelling political and literary figures of the Southern Appalachians during the middle of the twentieth century. She goes on to say, “Don West was a poet, a promoter of mountain music, a minister, a labor organizer, an educator, a leftist activist, an amateur historian and a firm advocate for grass-roots mountain people and traditional regional values.” Could there be any higher praise for a life well lived?
What do these three have in common? They were all three ministers and teachers. They all three believed deeply in their mission.
Am I a saint or a sinner? The truth is someone else gets to decide. For now the folks who watch me live my life can decide for themselves, but ultimately I will be judged by my Creator and on that day I must rely on the hope found in His Grace. Until then all I can do is try to walk in the footprints of His Son.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

C.F.M.I.

2008-01-14T06:51:00.000-08:00

{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.ncmentalhope.org
NEXT BLOG COMING Thursday, January 17, 2008
C.F.M.I. /January 14, 2008
Twenty years ago this year I started Christian Friends of the Mentally Ill which is now a division of Novastar Opportunities for the Mentally Ill, Inc. (formed in 1989). The other divisions of N.O.M.I., Inc. are Project Dream Again and Dream Again Press.
Soon after starting Christian Friends of the Mentally Ill, I conducted a survey of ministers and pastors about their thoughts on mental illness. To my surprise the number who returned the survey was far higher than could normally be expected, but the bigger surprise lay in the responses. Almost a third considered serious mental illness a moral issue rather than a medical one. A number of those considered it demon possession. I was devastated. At the time I wished I had never done the research.
How was I supposed to deal with the fact that my brain disease was seen by ministers and pastors as caused by a moral failure on my part? I am not claiming I was without sin, but my sins did not cause my bipolar disorder.
Then I read about and corresponded with H. Newton Malony, Senior Professor of Psychology, Department of Clinical Psychology, Fuller Theological Seminary.
“Education:
AB, Birmingham Southern College
MDiv, Yale Divinity School
MA, PhD, George Peabody College
Biographical Information:
Newt Malony has been active on the faculty of the seminary since joining the School of Psychology in 1969.
A prodigious scholar, Malony's most recent publications include Living with Paradox: Religious Leadership and the Genius of Double Vision (1998) and Christ in the Heart of Psychology: The Early Years of Fuller Seminary's School of Psychology (1996). A licensed psychologist and ordained United Methodist minister, Malony has also maintained professional involvement in the American Psychological Association, California Psychological Association, Society for the Scientific Study of Religion, and American College of Forensic Examiners.
Areas of Expertise, Research, Writing, and Teaching:
Transactional Analysis, Clinical psychology, Psychology of religion, Integration of psychology and theology, Religious tolerance.” [from Fuller’s website]
Dr. Malony gave me the encouragement to continue with Christian Friends and listed it in his book Religion and Mental Illness: A Directory of Programs Sponsored by Churches and Congregations.
Then I met Dr. John Baggett at that time Executive Director of NAMI NC. He was also a graduate of a seminary and also encouraged my work to get faith communities to reach out to those of us with serious mental illnesses and our families.
Then I got to meet and talk with Dr. Robert Coles, author of over fifty books, at a conference in Washington, DC. That chat and his book, The Call of Service, which he dedicated To the memory of Dorothy Day, confirmed in my mind that I was on the right road.
“There is a call to us, a call of service-that we join with others to try to make things better in this world.” Dorothy Day
Do you hear the still small voice inside you calling you to service?
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
THE BLOG CAN BE FOUND AT:
http://projectdreamagain.blogspot.com
http://www.7villages.com/FamiliesoftheMentallyIll
[An online community of The United Methodist Church]

SACRED PLACES & RECOVERY

2008-01-10T05:47:00.000-08:00

NEXT BLOG COMING MONDAY, January 14, 2008
SACRED PLACES & RECOVERY / January 10, 2008
The recovery journey which I call learning to Dream Again is a path full of twists and turns. It has peaks and valleys. Times of joy and moments of depth defying depression. There is nothing easy about the recovery journey for a person with a serious mental illness or a person who has suffered a severe trauma such as childhood sexual abuse or rape. The exciting fact is that there is hope. One does not have to stay lost on the path. The journey can be made. You can learn to Dream Again.
A recent special issue of U.S. News & World Report was about sacred places. In that issue they say about sacred places, “They are as varied as the human sense of the sacred and as various as the world’s many spiritual traditions. Sacred places range from entire cities to that special room in your home, and can be man-made or part of nature.”
Yesterday, two of my friends and I drove up Wilson’s Creek. The Wilson’s Creek area is part of the Grandfather District of the Pisgah National Forest. Looking at a map, the area is just south of the Blue Ridge Parkway near Grandfather Mountain and east of NC 181, north of Morganton. Wilson’s Creek was added to the National Wild and Scenic River System on August 18, 2000. The headwaters are below Calloway Peak and the creek stretches over 23 miles before emptying into John's River. To me Wilson’s Creek is a sacred place.
I have been to others. I grew up on a mission station in Zimbabwe, Africa one hundred miles from the Great Zimbabwe ruins. Since Europeans first encountered the ruins of Great Zimbabwe, it has been the focus of ideological concern and conflict. Unwilling to believe that sub-Saharan Africans could have built such a structure, adventurers and ideologues long claimed the ruins a mystery, theorizing that ancient Phoenicians, Arabs, Romans, or Hebrews created the structures. No one knows who built the place, but it was a sacred place for me.
Winifred Gallagher, author of The Power of Place: How Our Surroundings Shape Our Thoughts, Emotions, and Actions(Harper Perennial, 1994), wrote in the same issue about sacred places, “ Frank Lloyd Wright, who insisted that even ordinary homes should offer hearths and openness to the outdoors, said, "Nature is my manifestation of God." Over years of thinking and writing about how our external worlds affect our inner ones, I've visited Europe's cathedrals, India's temples, and Morocco's mosques. Nevertheless, when I hear "sacred place," I think first of my modest home, a one-room schoolhouse in the woods, where I'm writing these words.
Like many American homes, the schoolhouse combines natural and architectural ingredients in its recipe for ordinary sacredness. On this chilly morning, sunlight floods the white, high-ceilinged room. The only sounds come from the brook, the wind rustling in the sere autumn leaves, and the fire crackling in the wood stove. When I woke up, the first thing I saw was a small herd of deer grazing on the lawn. The schoolhouse has precious little plumbing and no central heating, cell service, or high-speed Internet. Given a hard enough rainstorm, it has no electricity.
Despite the inconveniences—or perhaps because of them—this is where I come to be cut off from the status quo, glimpse the big picture, and remember the deep truths that are so easy to forget elsewhere.”
What is the truth we need to learn? That finding a sacred place to simply be so we can find the peace to get the rest and recharging needed to fight on is one of the major keys to the recovery journey. You might just find a surprise there. You might discover the Creator is already waiting inside of you just hoping someday you will become still enough to hear the small calming voice.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

PARTICIPATORY DECISION MAKING

2008-01-08T05:47:00.000-08:00

NEXT BLOG COMING January 10, 2008 “Sacred Places and Recovery”
PARTICIPARTORY DECISION MAKING / January 8, 2008
I just read the Raleigh THE NEWS & OBSERVER editorial titled “Recovery Mode” so I am doing something I seldom do. I am writing an extra blog this week. I normally write only on Mondays and Thursdays, but this is just too much.
It seems that editorials boards across this state are delighted with Secretary Dempsey Benton and his “proven” administrative ability. Let me be clear. The fact that you were a good or even great city manager of Raleigh or a competent administrator of another state agency does not mean you know enough to deal with the issues facing the mental health system in this state. Just being a nice guy does not cut the mustard either.
I am 59 and I have lived with a diagnosis of a serious mental illness since I was 15. I am also a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. Earlier in my life I used drugs that were not prescribed to me by a physician. I am also what is called a family member which simply means that members of my family suffer from a mental illness.
I have been an advocate since 1988. I served on the board of NAMI NC in the late 80’s. I served on the original committee that formed the North Carolina Mental Health Consumer’s Organization, Inc. I served in the early 90’s as National Co-Chair of the Religious Outreach Network of NAMI now called FAITH-NET. In south Florida I served on many committees and boards along with writing the proposals for funding and helping to start three primary consumer run drop-in centers one of which was on the grounds of South Florida State Hospital.
I have been President of Novastar Opportunities for the Mentally Ill, Inc. (N.O.M.I. pronounced know me) which Project Dream Again is a division of since 1989. I say all this to introduce myself before saying what I am about to say.
IF THIS STATE IS GOING TO GET IT RIGHT THEN IT WILL HAVE TO DECIDE TO USE PARTICIPATORY DECISION MAKING AS THE PROCESS TO DECIDE HOW TO GO FORWARD. NOT EXPERTS. NOT WORK GROUPS THAT PRIMARY CONSUMERS EITHER ARE NOT THERE OR ARE MERE TOKENS.
The bottom line truth is the only true experts are those living with the illness, their families, and those individuals willing to listen closely to what they say. Other than those all you have are people who think they know or who are guessing. The fact is the best information you will ever get about a psych hospital is the information you get by making friends with someone receiving services there and letting them tell you what things are like. Let them tell you the real deal.
I have monitored many hospitals and programs. Yes, I looked at charts and records. Yes, I talked to staff and administration. However, the best information I got was when I sat quietly by someone receiving services there and just let them talk.
I was in south Florida when Hurricane Andrew came through. Broward County, FL’s mental health community put together a team to go into the worst hit parts of Dade County. I went to an apartment complex looking for consumers from one of the mental health centers. The large apartment complex was in shambles. To my surprise the mental health consumers where in better shape than the “chronically normal people”. In fact, they were helping them.
Secretary Benton you might want to think about letting us help you this time. This is your Hurricane Andrew.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

HEALING?

2008-01-07T06:57:00.000-08:00

HOMEPAGE
www.projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
NEXT BLOG COMING January 10, 2008 “Sacred Places and Recovery”
HEALING? / January 7, 2008
I grew up in a home where the dinner discussion was often either about the school board or the church board. My father was a school principal and my mother a teacher. My father was also an Elder and ordained minister in the church. As an adult I worked at companies where I came in contact with their boards and even formed my own companies where I was part of the board, but it was not until I started Project Dream Again that I knew anything about editorial boards at newspapers. They are a different breed.
In Sunday’s The Charlotte Observer (www.charlotte.com) Ed Williams, Editorial Page Editor, ran their opinion piece titled Healing HHS. They are giving their endorsement to Secretary Dempsey Benton’s ideas for improving or in their words “fixing N.C. mental health woes.”
The plan they are praising according to their editorial boils down to keeping two state hospitals open longer than planned, bringing “the state’s 14 mental health facilities under his direction” (the state facilities were already under his direction and there are only four operating psychiatric hospitals the others that the Observer refers to as mental health facilities are alcohol and drug abuse treatment centers, developmental centers, residential programs for children and neuro-medical treatment centers) and convening three work groups.
First, let me point out that healing HHS here in North Carolina whatever that means to the editorial board of The Charlotte Observer or to Secretary Benton does not mean it will or it will not help heal a single one of us who are suffering from a serious mental illness. There is no direct connection between a healthy North Carolina Department of Health and Human Services and the recovery journey of persons like me with a mental illness. I will never see Secretary Benton or any of his staff. Real solutions will never come from the top down or from bringing in experts or from work groups. Real solutions come from the bottom up from the person being served and from frontline workers. The concept has a name. It is called participatory decision making rather than using a dictatorial management style. Participatory decision making starts with the person being served along with the people of his/her choice and the people serving the person not with the head of the agency or hospital and certainly not with the Secretary of the Department.
Second, the editorial board is praising work groups before they have produced any product. Before starting Project Dream Again, I was in sales and manufacturing. I can’t imagine getting told well done before a single product was produced or sold. Does the editorial board handing out this praise even know the expertise of the majority of the folks on these work groups?
The paper calls them “sure-footed strategies”. I call them doing what you do when you don’t know what to do. You appoint work groups to study the matter. You move the chess pieces around pretending the responsibility is now someplace else. I guess I would do the same thing if I took over a department that I knew nothing about. Where did Secretary Benton get his experience in mental health is what the editorial board ought to have been thinking about rather than praising “sure-footed strategies” that they don’t have a clue were they lead us to.
Am I being too hard on Secretary Benton and whoever wrote the piece on the opinion page of The Charlotte Observer? No, because we don’t have time for anymore experts to be brought in, study groups, or on the job training for the Secretary of HHS. We need someone in the lead now who knows about us. Not someone trying to learn on the job. This mess we are in was not caused by us. We did not decide to have a mental illness, but we are here now. We don’t need study or work groups. We don’t have time to do on the job training for Secretary Benton.
WE NEED SERVICES. APPROPIATE SERVICES. BASED ON A SERVICE PLAN WE AGREE TO. DELIVERED IN A TIMELY, RESPECTFUL, AND COMPETENT MANNER.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

FERTILE INNER SELF

2008-01-03T01:29:00.000-08:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BLOG
HOMEPAGE
www.projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org

FERTILE INNER SELF/ January 3, 2008
Bobbie Ann Mason, a native of my home state of Kentucky, has a character (Emmett, a Vietnam vet) in her book In Country say “If you can think about something like birds, you can get outside of yourself, and it doesn’t hurt as much. That’s the whole idea. That’s the whole challenge for the human race. Think about that. Put your thinking cap on Sam (a teenage girl). Put that in your pipe and smoke it! But I can barely get to the point where I can be a self to get out of.”
Being a self sounds simple enough, but is it really? We all are being something, but when I look around me most people seem to be trying to be like each other. Others are totally absorbed in either their jobs or their kids. I am not sure they even know who they are. Do they have an identity other than their work or through their kids?
You can find tons of stuff written about community now days. In fact, I write about it here often. It is important, but you can not become a strong member of a community if you don’t know who you are. A strong community is made up of strong selves.
You may ask how can that be. Don’t you have to give up self when you enter a community or a marriage? Only if you are entering a cult or marrying a control freak. Let me ask you this. Did Jesus when he came into the world community stop being Jesus? Did Moses have a strong self as he led the Hebrew people out of bondage? Did Gandhi or Martin Luther King, Jr. have strong selves as they advocated for the freedom and rights of all people?
I understand and have written in this blog about the importance of community. Nothing I am saying here changes that. The point here is that individuals are the building blocks of communities and the stronger they are the stronger the community will be.
Trauma, especially early and prolonged childhood sexual trauma, can damage the ability to form a concept of self. The stigma of psychiatric labels can also make it hard to develop a sound self. There are other social, psychological, genetic, and spiritual factors that get in the way. Developing a strong inner self is not simple nor is there a single pathway one must take. However, let me leave you with this thought. Is not the safest and wisest place to plant and grow your fruitful and fertile inner self in the loving arms of our Creator?
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

LABELS & DNA

2007-12-06T05:45:00.000-08:00

THE SYSTEM

2007-12-03T04:08:00.000-08:00

FAMILY

2007-11-29T04:08:00.000-08:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BLOG
HOMEPAGE
www.projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
http://eminnews.org/index.htm

FAMILY/ November 29, 2007
My father was a missionary, educator, and minister. He wrote these words before his death in 1989. This is the condensed form of the Forward by him to my book “When Even the Devil Deserts You”. This piece first appeared in my blog March 4, 2005
““We experienced great disappointment and frustration that our child with outstanding ability was unable to cope in work or school. It was difficult during the earlier years of his illness to differentiate between his mental illness and adolescent behavior. We felt some of our friends and colleagues did not accept us in the usual manner because of our son’s behavior, that they considered us less respectable because of a non-conforming member of the family. The mentally ill and their families have a special need for people to befriend them, not in sympathy but in understanding and support. .......... There were times we did not know where Edward was, even for weeks. We wondered whether he had food or shelter, and even whether he was alive. It was very difficult for me to swallow food, not knowing whether he had anything to eat. .......... When Ed was at home we would lie awake at night and listen, for fear he would get up and try to leave. Once when I found him on the street and brought him home, he did not even recognize the house, and he said he did not have a key when he suggested that he go into the room where he usually slept. We offered him coffee and he said he didn’t have any money to pay for it. ............ One of the most painful experiences was visiting him on a locked ward in a hospital and hearing the door being locked behind us as we left without being able to take him home with us. ....... A few months ago Edward told us about the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill. We found out about groups meeting in our area and started attending monthly meetings of two of these support groups. Until then we felt isolated, knowing no one else personally who shared our problems and feelings. ........ Our son has made us more aware than ever of the spiritual needs of the mentally ill and their families. There is stigma and a lack of knowledge concerning mental illness to be overcome. Stigma must be erased and replaced with compassion. It is not easy to stand before my peers and state that I have a son who is mentally ill and that we should have a ministry in our church to help alleviate the stigma and to reach out in love and compassion to the mentally ill and their families as we do when someone has a physical illness. I must continue to do so, and so must others if this problem of neglect is to be addressed with the emphasis and implementation that it deserves.”
I think this piece has a lot to say. It is not his complete Forward to the book, but it gives you some idea about what he thought about having a son with mental illness before he died. The church he was a leader in never did start a ministry and he made few if any presentations on the subject.
The point of sharing this is to say how very hard it is on the family. Mental Illness is no walk in the park. A broken brain and a shattered soul need a home. A place to be embraced.
I want to share another blog that appeared April 6, 2005. It is also about family. About a family member who taught me about spirituality.
“With the death of Pope John Paul II, I have started thinking more about my own faith and spiritual life. Even though I was raised in a fundamentalist Christian church which in my youth taught us to believe the Pope was in league with the devil, I have come to love this Pope. The strength of his faith as he faced death is to be admired. I think the world will miss this man.
Another man who faced death with more courage, dignity and faith than I could imagine was my brother-in-law. Tom Edwards had spent his life as a minister, missionary and writer among other things, but it was the way he faced his own death that made his life stand out to me. He emailed me often before he died. We had never been that close really, but his emails were a ministry to me during one of my deep depressions. How he found it in his heart to minister to me as he faced his own death is still a mystery to me.
There is no doubt in my mind that Tom had faith in his own salvation and in the God he had served all his life. I have heard him preach about faith and belief, but his all time best sermon in my mind was the way he faced his own death. It was with a certainty I had never seen before and have not seen since in a person that I knew personally.
Maybe Tom Edwards and John Paul are meeting in heaven right now. What will they discuss? Of course I really have no idea, but maybe they will chat about why some of us have such a hard time with faith.
I started preaching in my early teens while in Rhodesia, now Zimbabwe, with my parents who were missionaries there. I was last in a pulpit over a decade ago speaking about the need for the church to reach out to folks like me who suffer from a mental illness. Do I believe anything? Am I a person of faith?
Among other things Tom’s faith helped him face his own death. My faith has kept me alive. Since a child I have been suicidal. Sometimes I have been locked away in a hospital, but the real thing that has kept me alive when I most wanted to kill myself was my faith. I have just enough faith and belief not to risk making God mad at me by killing myself. Not enough to live by, but too much to die with. Maybe someday I will have enough faith to face the day of my death with the dignity of Tom and John Paul.”
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

BEING A FAMILY MEMBER

2007-11-26T02:53:00.000-08:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BLOG
HOMEPAGE
www.projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org
http://eminnews.org/index.htm

BEING A FAMILY MEMBER/ November 26, 2007
Being a family member of a person with a mental illness is harder than being the person with the mental illness. I think I have the right to state that personal opinion because I have watched the suffering of my family over the years and because along with being a person with a mental illness I am a family member myself.
My parents and my sisters have been in agony over the years because of my illness. Both of my parents are dead. They did not live to see the better years. The years I have put together over the past fifteen years or so. My father died right at the beginning of the better years and my mom was so sick she died early in them. Too early to know it was a lasting change. I had strung good months together before. How was she to know this time was any different?
Let me tell you a little about the program I have been on. I call it the Patty Program. When I talk about it in seminars or speeches people always say, “Well that sounds good, but everybody does not have a Patty.” Don’t make that mistake here please. It is true. No one else has a Patty. She is special. She is my wife. I would not loan her out even if I could, but anyone who knows Patty knows I don’t own her so I couldn’t loan her.
We now have the first concept of the Patty Program. You don’t own your loved one. I do not own Patty and she does not own me. That puts the burden for my behavior on me. Since I am not a slave, but rather a free person I must take responsibility for my own actions. Being free is scary. It takes courage to accept the responsibility rather than blame the illness.
I liked the highs of mania. They were better than any high produced by any drug. Until I decided to take my meds on a regular basis the better years did not begin. When I first went on medications regularly for my bipolar illness, I went for a time to the Outpatient Clinic at Memorial Hospital in Broward County, FL ,but it was not the therapy there that helped. It was my friend Joyce who was in charge, but still took time to talk to me that helped me over the hump. It was Jan at who I saw at mental health meetings and who had run a group for years who helped. It was Patty who never tried to force the drugs, but just simply walked beside me.
We now have the second concept. BE WILLING TO SIMPLY WALK BESIDE THE PERSON YOU LOVE. This is not easy for a family member to do. You see someone suffering and you naturally want it relieved. It is how you help them get it relieved that matters.
Sally Clay, one of the leading advocates, grew up in the same small town in Kentucky that I lived in just before Daddy took us to the mission field in southern Africa. She wrote an article for the Dream Again Journal which was published by Dream Again Press for a few years in the 90’s. It was called “Spirituality and Anger” and can still be found at her website www.sallyclay.net. It was published in the January 1996 issue. Sally Clay might say I am stepping over the line here too.
Kurt Entsminger in his statement on the website of the Treatment Advocacy Center where he will become the Executive Director January 2, 2008 says, “It is my history that brought me to TAC. As a person who has struggled with bipolar disorder for many years, I understand firsthand the difference that effective treatment can make in allowing someone to function normally again. My hospitalization and subsequent and continuing treatment is the reason I’m well today.”
I have no problem with that statement but then later on he says, “I was particularly drawn to this new position because of my great empathy for the hundreds of thousands of Americans who continue, without treatment, to struggle with the consequences of untreated severe brain disorders. Far too many people with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder are living on our streets, are warehoused in our prisons, and unnecessarily remain at risk for violence or suicide. I believe it is time to restore common sense to a society that has literally sacrificed human sanity in the name of personal privacy and an outdated and unrealistic understanding of what constitutes true civil rights. “
Now I got a problem Kurt. In 1978 Judi Chamberlin’s book “On Our Own” came out. It is available at the National Empowerment Center store online at www.power2u.org. At Sally Clay’s website there is information about a book “On Our Own, Together” edited by Sally Clay. Maybe Kurt should read them both.
My disability Kurt nor the disability of any of my fellow sojourners does not mean we have lost any of our rights so let’s just talk plain. Your words are code for let’s force treatment on every poor soul we decide needs it.
Kurt, another book you might want to read was written by Edward M. Podvoll, M.D. In the “The Seduction of Madness” he says, “Moments of natural recovery, ‘islands of clarity’ as I have called them, happen all the time within the experience of psychosis; not only can these be recognized and acknowledged, they need to be protected.”
How do I know Dr. Podvoll is right? Because I have experienced them. “On Our Own” may be the only way when our own betray us.
I wrote about how hard it was to be a family member in my own book “When Even the Devil Deserts You” which is still available through Dream Again Press at www.projectdreamagain.com, but please try the Patty Program before resorting to forced treatment. Do you know how many of us get killed each year while they are trying to pick us up to take us in for the forced treatment? Do you know how many of us die while we are in there? Do you know how many of us will never trust a mental health professional again or the person who had it done?
No matter how tough the road gets embrace me don’t force treat me then at least I can still trust somebody.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

I AM NOT A CAR

2007-11-19T02:54:00.000-08:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BLOG
HOMEPAGE
www.projectdreamagain.com
FIGHT STIGMA , HELP SOMEONE ELSE LEARN ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESS, AND SUPPORT PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BY BUYING A BOOK!!!! GO TO THE ORDER PAGE AT
www.projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org
www.mentalhealthchaplain.org

I AM NOT A CAR!/ November 19, 2007

I am not a car. You can’t just take me to a mechanic at a garage and have new parts put in me. The recovery process is not like fixing a broken piece of machinery. It is more like a long walk with good weather some days and bad weather other days. Sometimes the path is so far down between the mountains you can barely see the sun when it comes up. Other days you are walking on top of a mountain along the ridge and all seems well. You must keep walking even after the sun goes down and there is only darkness all around. If you want to help me, then walk beside me. The problem is too many people have the fix-it syndrome and only want to fix me rather than walk beside me.
I don’t have to be told that I have flaws and things that I need to work on. I am well aware of my faults because the world never lets me forget them. What I need as well as what my fellow sojourners need are fewer critics and more folks willing to take the steps along the path with us.
It takes the ability to see things from our viewpoint. That may sound simple, but it is not. Merriam-Webster Online defines empathy this way, “the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another.”
I don’t know how many times I have said in frustration, “If they think they can do it better with what I have to work with then jump in my shoes and do it.” I know I have said it enough times that my wife must be tired of hearing it, but I get tired of being told what I should be able to do and what I should do without being asked what I want.
This is not just a “poor Ed” piece. I am trying to convey the idea that if you want to be helpful to a person on their recovery journey who has a mental illness then you will have to partner with them not try to direct or drive them.
You have to change the viewpoint from yours to theirs. This gets tricky. I am always asked, “But what if they say something delusional?” “Are you saying I should say I see something or hear something that I don’t.” No I am not.
Empathic understanding, genuineness, and unconditional positive regard that were the tri-pod that Carl Rogers’ work stood on does not mean you reinforce or agree to any delusional thinking system, illegal act, or immoral act. It means exactly what it says.
However, telling a person that they don’t see a big six foot tall rabbit when they tell you they do will get you exactly no where. A simple “I’m sorry I don’t see him” is enough. It shows you heard the person and respect the person, but you have not agreed to seeing something you did not see. In fact we have been known to do such things as test mental health professionals to see what they would say when we say delusional things and then at times we are simply delusional, but when I look around me I sometimes can’t tell who the delusional ones are.
The point here is we aren’t cars. We need someone willing to walk the hills, deserts, marsh lands, flat lands, and beaches with us. Will you talk a walk with us today?

[There will not be a BLOG Thursday. Next BLOG will be Monday, November 26]

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

THE CARPENTER

2007-11-16T02:10:00.000-08:00

FIRST-PERSON

2007-11-12T00:52:00.000-08:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BLOG
HOMEPAGE
www.projectdreamagain.com
FIGHT STIGMA , HELP SOMEONE ELSE LEARN ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESS, AND SUPPORT PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BY BUYING A BOOK!!!! GO TO THE ORDER PAGE AT
www.projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org

FIRST-PERSON/ November 12, 2007

Why when I go see a psychiatrist does it seem like they can’t see the whole me? I know part of the problem is the way we fund the public mental health system. They can’t spend very much time with me and they certainly aren’t going to deal with any physical problems I might have. Also, when I go to my medical doctor I know he/she can’t spend any time dealing with my mental illness. In fact, if I happen to be manic or near manic they seem to not want to treat me at all. It is hard to get my medical needs taken care of. It is hard to be seen and treated as a whole person.
Back to the original question. One of the big problems is how the mind is viewed. Daniel C. Dennett and many others see the mind as simply the brain in action. That has been a convenient viewpoint for the drug makers and the funders of the system. If a person’s mind is only an action of his or her brain then a pill will fix the problem.
What if Dennett and those who think like him are wrong? What if mind is more than merely the action of one’s brain? Cartesian dualism says they are wrong, but modern science simply dismisses Descartes (1596-1650) as a philosopher without the facts of modern science. I simply dismiss Dennett and his theories as not having all the facts. You do not have to be a Cartesian dualist to disagree with Dennett.
When I do seminars on FIRST-PERSON I am basically trying to get across three concepts.
1) We are bio-psycho-social-spiritual beings therefore our minds are greater than merely a function of our brains because we also have a soul through which we can communicate with the Creator.
2) That the person has FIRST-PERSON knowledge with respect to the contents of his or her mind, whereas others (third persons) can only get at these contents indirectly. Therefore the person has FIRST-PERSON AUTHORITY.
3) FIRST-PERSON AUTHORITY means the person is the one who gets to make the decisions on the recovery journey because they have the best most accurate knowledge. When I am at my worst I will need help, but if you haven’t built a relationship with me on this principle then I will not let you help me. I will not trust you when I need to.
FIRST-PERSON may sound simple or it may sound wrong to you, but it works. It is along with hope and learning to Dream Again the keys to being able to walk the recovery pathway. I know. I am walking it each day. Sometimes I stumble way back down the mountain and have to pick myself up and start all over. I have been doing this since 1964 and I can tell you I don’t trust anyone who does not trust me. You can’t help me if I don’t trust you. FIRST-PERSON shows you trust me. Then I might trust you when I need help.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

OUR CHILDREN

2007-11-08T03:45:00.000-08:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BLOG
HOMEPAGE
www.projectdreamagain.com
FIGHT STIGMA , HELP SOMEONE ELSE LEARN ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESS, AND SUPPORT PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BY BUYING A BOOK!!!! GO TO THE ORDER PAGE AT
www.projectdreamagain.com
{Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org
www.annafoundation.org

OUR CHILDREN/ November 8, 2007
Pulitzer Prize winning cartoonist and novelist Doug Marlette, who recently died, wrote this line in what Pat Conroy calls “the finest first novel to come out of North Carolina since the publication of Thomas Wolfe’s Look Homeward, Angel.” Marlette wrote in The Bridge “We both know that monsters don’t spring full blown from Zeus’s brow.”
Likewise a baby is not born fully developed. Multiple factors and influences go into the development of an adult human being. One of the tragic influences we need to pay more attention to is childhood sexual abuse. The following article is a good example that we do not take seriously enough the protection of OUR CHILDREN.
“The former pastor of the Believers Faith Center in Iredell County, accused last year of sexually assaulting minors, has pleaded guilty to taking indecent liberties with children and has been placed on probation.
Carl Edward Nixon, who now lives in Charlotte, entered his guilty pleas Friday in courthouses in Iredell and Rowan counties, Rawls said. He was placed on probation for five years in Iredell and for four years in Rowan, the defense lawyer said. He'll be on intensive probation the first six months and will have daily contact with a probation officer.
Nixon, 66, is now employed as a truck driver. He must register as a sex offender with the state and can't be around children without another adult present, the defense lawyer said. He also must perform 50 hours of community service.
Two women in Nixon's church told authorities that Nixon made inappropriate contact with them more than 10 years ago when they were 11 and 14 years old, Detective Sgt. Bill Hamby told the Observer after the pastor was charged in 2006.
"Probation was appropriate because Carl Nixon accepted responsibility for his conduct," Rawls said, "and the conduct occurred in the late 1980s and early 1990s."
Iredell Assistant District Attorney Paxton Butler said he agreed to the plea because he believes Nixon likely would have gotten probation even had he been convicted at trial. Nixon didn't have a criminal record and didn't do anything more than inappropriate touching, the prosecutor said.
"You're glad when your victims aren't subjected to terrible abuse, but sometimes you wish you could do more," Butler said. "But the law doesn't allow for more when it stops at just the touching.” [THE CHARLOTTE OBSERVER, TUESDAY NOVEMBER 6]
Why do I keep writing about a subject most people do not want to hear about? Because OUR CHILDREN are in danger from a society who does not have the will to protect them or the will to properly deal with the people who victimize them.
The defense attorney thinks because the man confessed and because the sexual abuse was years ago the punishment was appropriate. One of the District Attorneys agreed to the plea because it was only touching. I guess he doesn’t know only touching is sexual abuse. I guess he doesn’t know that only touching from your Pastor has lasting memories you can’t forget. I guess he just plain doesn’t know anything about us.
Most victims of childhood sexual abuse of which I am one would have the same reaction as I do to this story. We know we did not all suffer the same amount or length of abuse. We know we did not suffer the same amount of physical pain. We know that each one of us coped in a different way. I believe we all have one thing in common. Deep in our hearts we would like to see justice. If you think justice was done in this case as the defense lawyer and prosecuting attorney does then OUR CHILDREN will never be safe.
Please go to this web site www.annafoundation.org
and then give some serious thought to the subject. As I have said before lots of folks with mental illnesses are also victims, but all OUR CHILDREN need all of us.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

WORDS MATTER

2007-11-05T02:05:00.000-08:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN HOMEPAGE
[A NEW THOUGHT is published every day as well as the BLOG on MONDAYS & THURSDAYS at:]
www.projectdreamagain.com

WORDS MATTER/ November 5, 2007
“Imagine, if you will, a world in which the right-wing pundit Ann Coulter were not a grating opportunist who said horrible things on air for her own personal gain. Imagine—and it's a stretch—that she occasionally said something interesting or at least worth considering. Then her recent comments on Donny Deutsch's cable show might have generated a useful conversation instead a lot of name-calling and Scripture quoting. Here is what happened: Coulter and Deutsch were bantering about Israel and Iran, when Coulter used the phrase that has gotten so much attention. Christians, she said, ‘just want Jews to be perfected.’
‘Wow, you didn't really say that, did you?’ asked Deutsch.
‘Yes, that's what Christianity is,’ Coulter answered. Later in the program, Deutsch called Coulter "anti-Semitic," and in the days that followed, the Anti-Defamation League condemned Coulter's statement and the National Jewish Democratic Council called on news organizations to quit inviting Coulter on their programs. On the blogs, Christians alternately signaled their support of or opposition to Coulter's statement with Bible verses and profanity.”(Newsweek, November 5, 2007)
We may think our words don’t matter, but they do. Ann Coulter makes a very good living using them to hurt other people and other groups of people. For those of us with a disability, we know how much words mean. For people from a minority religion, color, or nationality they know how much words matter.
When the old adage “actions speak louder than words” was given birth, it was not the age of mass communication. A political blog in today’s world can have more influence than even a major march on Washington, DC.
My wife can do a hundred good actions, but break my spirit with a single word. I am not trying to say actions are not important. I am trying to get you to think about how much what you say and write matters.
What you don’t say and write matters too. When I lived on the streets on New York City (or any of the other cities where I found myself without housing) panhandling (begging for money), I would have loved to have heard a kind word. I would not have cared what personal faith the person had if any. I wanted and needed more than a kind word. I was able to panhandle quarters, but I seldom heard a kind word.
How are we to DREAM THE DREAM ONWARD to use a phrase from Jung if we never hear an encouraging word? Hate speech is a crime, but I don’t recall reading of a single case of it involving a person like me with a mental illness. Does it happen? Yes.
One example is the pulpit of churches across this country each Sunday. Let me ask you. What other group of people would society allow to be called demon possessed? I can hear you. It does not happen Ed. Yes it does.
In fact, my fellow sojourners are not only called demon possessed, but in some church somewhere in this great country of ours each Sunday a person with a brain disease is going through an exorcism. I can’t give you a number of how many a year, but I can assure you without any doubt whatsoever that what I am saying is a fact. To be called demon possessed when you have a medical illness ought to be considered a crime and hate speech, but then we are merely the mentally ill. Think how we have been treated down through the ages.
Yesterday my soul was blessed by a wonderful Sunday School lesson taught by a lady who believes deeply in the Grace of God. She does not see me as a candidate for an exorcism, but rather as a child of God. May all my fellow sojourners experience such a soul enriching moment.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

{Here are some good resources you might want to check out. Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}

www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

FIGHT STIGMA AND HELP SOMEONE ELSE LEARN ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESS BY BUYING A BOOK!!!! GO TO THE ORDER PAGE AT
www.projectdreamagain.com

WAKING UP!

2007-11-01T01:49:00.001-07:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN HOMEPAGE
[A NEW THOUGHT is published every day as well as the BLOG on MONDAYS & THURSDAYS at:]
www.projectdreamagain.com

WAKING UP/ November 1, 2007
During September 2006 they took me off the medication that had been controlling my bipolar illness and put me on another medication. The new one did not work so they changed my medication again. All this because the blood tests were showing bad liver numbers. Finally, they did an ultra sound of my liver and discovered I had an abdominal aortic aneurysm and I had surgery in March 2007. As soon as I was able, we moved from our farm in southeastern Kentucky to the little town of Glen Alpine, North Carolina.
I had been in a long hibernation in Kentucky. A bear only hibernates during the winter, but I was doing it year around. With the medication change, I began to climb towards mania. There is some disagreement in the household (my wife and I) how close I made it to full blown mania.
I made it to the stage I could not sleep. I was extremely irritable. My head was full of more ideas than I could possibly get done. It seemed to me like the whole world was in slow motion and I was the only one moving at a reasonable pace. Call it what you will. I had waked up. I was no longer hibernating.
Complicating my bipolar disorder is the fact that I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. Dually diagnosed usually means mentally ill and an addiction. What about a major mental illness and childhood sexual abuse? What is it called? A few blogs back I wrote about tri-diagnosis by which I meant a mental illness, an addiction, and childhood sexual abuse. I am no longer using any substance not prescribed by a doctor, but I have. I am not alone. Go to the streets and the state hospitals and you will find many folks like me. The public mental health system and for that matter the private system does a poor job dealing with us. We are referred to as treatment resistant if we are referred to at all. Mostly we are ignored if they can get by with it. Do a search and find out how much has been written on the subject. Especially look for research about folks with a major mental illness who have dealt with their childhood sexual abuse by self-medicating and by developing a number of people inside them to deal with the world. I think they call it Dissociative Identity Disorder.
The positive side of waking up is that I resurrected Project Dream Again. I started this blog. I built a web site. I gave presentations during Mental Illness Awareness Week and I had not given a presentation in almost four years. I had my book reprinted because people were asking for it. I am corresponding with folks in prisons and people who write me in response to the blog which is posted in five places on the net and sent out to an e-list. I am advocating on the local and state level. I am awake.
I am somewhat calmer now, but not back to where I was before the medication change in September 2006. It has been a long and grueling time for both me and my wife. Yes some good has come out of it, but the price is pretty high. What if Patty had given up on me during all this? Would Project Dream Again matter then?
I am glad that my words and the work I do at times are helpful to folks, but it pains me deeply when my illness and my own actions hurt those people around me who love me. Bipolar disorder is a destructive illness when you can’t or will not get it under control. It destroys not just you, but the people who love you.
Folks serious mental illnesses are no joke. That is why I get so mad when the public mental health system never gets the funds it needs, gets turned over to for-profit corporations to take off the top of the already meager pie, and the planners never really listen to the real experts those of us with the illness and our families. Carl Rogers ( who I wrote about in the last blog) believed in the knowledge of the person. I wish the planners and funding sources did.
It may never change, but as long as I am awake I will keep trying to be heard.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

{Here are some good resources you might want to check out. Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}

www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

FIGHT STIGMA AND HELP SOMEONE ELSE LEARN ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESS BY BUYING A BOOK!!!! GO TO THE ORDER PAGE AT
www.projectdreamagain.com

BEYOND BELIEF

2007-10-29T01:15:00.000-07:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN HOMEPAGE
[A NEW THOUGHT is published every day as well as the BLOG on MONDAYS & THURSDAYS at:]
www.projectdreamagain.com

BEYOND BELIEF/ October 29, 2007
Carl R. Rodgers who some say is the founder of the humanistic psychology movement and father of person-centered therapy wrote the following, “I can remember this in my early grammar school days. A child would ask the teacher a question and the teacher would give a perfectly good answer to a completely different question. A feeling of pain and distress would always strike me. My reaction always was, ‘But you didn’t hear him!’”
Living with bipolar disorder can be like riding the giant roller coaster at the North Carolina State Fair. If you are not taking medications or if they are not working you can either be living in the depths of a depression or feeling like you are on top of the world in mania or anywhere in between. There is a stage just before mania in which I desperately want to be heard. From my father and mother who are dead to my wife, I have frustrated them by demanding they answer my questions exactly. I am trying to verify that I am being heard.
Why is it so important to me to know I am being heard? Because it means to me that they saw or see me as a person.
Whatever name you give it. Client-centered, Person-centered, or some other name we are talking about viewpoint. That is why I call it First-Person. I am trying to convey the idea that the recovery process belongs to the person therefore any help must come from the person’s viewpoint.
I was one of the trainers at South Florida State Hospital when Service Planning was introduced there. Service Planning was based on the idea that the planning process started with the person’s long term view of what they wanted for themselves. The same concept was introduced into the community mental health centers. I helped train hundreds of mental health professionals on this approach.
North Carolina has a similar set of papers to be filled out. I am sure there have been trainings here also.
You can train someone on the paperwork, but you can’t give them the heart and eyes to see us or the ears to hear us.
It takes someone spiritual who has already found their heart. Maybe even a person who has already had to crawl on their belly so that have empathy for me when I have to crawl on mine. It takes a person who is getting their needs met so they have the strength to help me meet mine. Only one person at a time can be helped in a therapeutic relationship.
Part of Carl Rodgers’ education was done at Union Theological Seminary. Don’t dismiss that as an influence on the body of work he left us. The three cornerstones of his philosophy (1) empathic understanding (2) genuineness and (3) unconditional positive regard could have come straight out of the teachings of Jesus which don’t forget was a Jew well learned in the Hebrew Scriptures.
What do I what most when I am at my worst? To be heard and seen. Just answer the question I ask and I will know you are hearing me. If you are hearing me then you are listening. If you are listening then you must think I am worthy. If that is so then maybe you think I am a person. That would be a victory beyond belief.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

{Here are some good resources you might want to check out. Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.}

www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

FIGHT STIGMA AND HELP SOMEONE ELSE LEARN ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESS BY BUYING A BOOK!!!! GO TO THE ORDER PAGE AT
www.projectdreamagain.com

CHILDHOOD SEXUAL TRAUMA

2007-10-25T04:53:00.001-07:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN HOMEPAGE
[A NEW THOUGHT is published every day as well as the BLOG on MONDAYS & THURSDAYS at:]
www.projectdreamagain.com

CHILDHOOD SEXUAL TRAUMA/ October 25, 2007
“Child sexual abuse is a significant public health problem in the United States and across the world. In the United States one out of three females and one out of five males have been victims of sexual abuse before the age of 18 years. Sexual abuse occurs across all ethnic/racial, socioeconomic, and religious groups. Unfortunately, sexual abuse is considered a relatively common experience in the lives of children. A report released by the National Institute of Justice in 1997 revealed that of the 22.3 million children between the ages of 12 and 17 years in the United States, 1.8 million were victims of a serious sexual assault/abuse. There are gender differences with regard to sexual abuse incidents; specifically, girls are at twice the risk than boys for sexual victimization throughout childhood and at eight times the risk during adolescence. Because significant physical, emotional, social, cognitive and behavioral problems are related to childhood trauma, the need to more effectively address the issue has become paramount.
There are a number of commonly held misconceptions regarding child sexual abuse in the United States. These include the following: sexual abuse is limited to sexual intercourse between an adult and a child; the perpetrator of the sexual abuse is always a stranger; and rape occurs with adult women, not children. However, these beliefs are false. Sexual abuse involves a range of activities including non-contact and contact offenses (see Table1); stranger abuse comprises only a small percentage of total victimizations; and children are approximately three times more likely than adults to be victims of rape. In fact, among females, almost 30% of all forcible rapes occur before the age of 11 years, and another 32% occur between the ages of 11 and 17.
Researchers in this area use somewhat different “criteria” for sexual abuse; the most common definition of sexual abuse, however, is any sexual activity involving a child where consent is not or cannot be given. Sexual contact between an adult and a minor child, as well as an older teen and a younger child, are both examples of sexual abuse. Depending upon the age at which a state deems a child capable of giving consent, sexual abuse between two minors can also occur. For example, the law in Texas dictates that there be greater than a three-year age differential between children in order to be considered sexual abuse. The types of sexual abuse vary widely and include both physical contact as well as non-contact offenses. Despite the choices made by laws and research criterion, the impact of a forced or coerced sexual activity can be devastating on a child even if the action cannot be legally or academically described as sexual abuse.
All states require some kind of mandated child abuse reporting. Child abuse reporting laws most often require specified professionals (e.g., physicians, teachers) who have contact with children to report to law enforcement, the department of social services, or children protection agencies incidents in which abuse is suspected. These laws were developed in order to better protect children. From state to state, it varies as to who is mandated to report and what abuse acts require reporting. For example, according to California Penal Code there are two categories of sexual abuse that are reportable: sexual assault and sexual exploitation. According to the code, sexual assault includes rape and rape in concert, oral copulation and sodomy, lewd and lascivious acts upon a child under the age of 14, penetration of a genital and/or anal opening by a foreign object, and child molestation. Sexual exploitation includes conduct involving matter depicting minors engaged in obscene acts; promoting, aiding, or assisting a minor to engage in prostitution; a live performance involving obscene sexual conduct, or posing for a pictorial depiction involving obscene conduct for commercial purposes; and depicting a child in or knowingly developing a pictorial depiction in which a child engages in obscene sexual conduct.”
(Dominquez, R. Z., Nelke, C.F. and Perry, B.D. Child Sexual Abuse in: Encyclopedia of Crime and Punishment Vol 1.(David Levinson, Ed.) Sage Publications, Thousand Oaks , 2002)
As those of you know who have been reading the blog I am a victim of childhood sexual abuse as well as a person with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder. I have also self-medicated. Many of my fellow sojourners share my story. You can call us the tri-diagnosed. I know I am hard to come up with an adequate treatment plan for and to live with.
I shared this rather long piece with you about childhood sexual trauma because I think it is still one of the big issues in this country which we have our heads in the sand about. We need to get smarter. You can’t just treat part of my problems. You have to treat all of me. If I am ever to become a person then the whole person has to be considered in the plan to address my recovery.
You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

Here are some good resources you might want to check out. Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this BLOG.

www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
www.faithnet.nami.org

FIGHT STIGMA AND HELP SOMEONE LEARN ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESS BY BUYING A BOOK!!!! GO TO THE ORDER PAGE AT
www.projectdreamagain.com

CORRUPTION

2007-10-22T03:12:00.001-07:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN HOMEPAGE
[A New Thought is published every day as well as the Blog on Mondays & Thursdays ]
www.projectdreamagain.com

CORRUPTION/ October 22, 2007

Jack Betts is an Observer associate editor at The Charlotte Observer. His piece this past Sunday was about a speech given in Chapel Hill, NC about ethical problems in public life by Joel Fleishman professor of law and public policy at Duke University. The draft of the full speech is available at a link at www.charlotte.com/jackbetts. The following is a short excerpt from the speech.
“Why has it begun to happen in N.C. and elsewhere at this particular time? I think that the explanation is deeper than simply a recurrence of the same old thing. I think it has to do with the increasing migration of individual and institutional behavior from the for-profit sector, in other words the market system, where self-interested motivation, in behalf of corporations and their employees, is not only acceptable but laudable, to the public and nonprofit sectors where naked self-interested behavior is usually inappropriate and often unethical if not illegal.”
I was in south Florida when South Florida State Hospital was turned over to a for-profit corporation. I sat on the governing body both when it was run by the state and when it was run by the corporation. I walked the grounds of the hospital when it was run by the state and also did many trainings there which meant I met both staff and my fellow sojourners living there. I was barely allowed on the grounds after the corporation took it over even though I was a member of their board, but then what can you expect from a company with a primary business of operating prisons. The hospital had felt like a college campus (I do not deny the problems there and I fussed with my usual loud voice about them), but when the corporation built the new hospital it felt like you were going to a place to be locked away.
Has the “migration of individual and institutional behavior from the for-profit sector” changed our public mental health system? Has it caused corruption? There may not be a simple answer, but I am going to give you one. YES!
Some of you may never have seen a three legged stool. Years ago in the hills of Kentucky some people had them in their barns to sit on as they milked their cows by hand. A good public mental health system stands on three legs. Heart. Knowledge. Money.
First, the public system must have folks working in it that have a heart. I have done many trainings and seminars with mental health professionals plus I have been going to them since I was 15 and I will be 59 next month. My calculator says that is 44 years. I always look to see if I detect a heart by which I mean do they see me and my fellow sojourners as people or simply as defective machines to be fixed. I fear the fix-it syndrome more than almost anything else. For me personally, if I can feel any kind of vibe other than a chill coming from the other person then there is a starting point.
Secondly, the people have to have knowledge. We have learned a great deal since 1964 when I first came in contact with the mental health profession, but that does not matter if the person working with me is stuck back in the dark ages. Keeping the workforce updated with the latest and best knowledge is extremely important. It doesn’t happen mainly because training does not bring in dollars. Billing services does.
Thirdly, it can not be done on the cheap. Ever since the powers that be decided to empty us out of the big institutions and start community mental health centers, the public mental health system has lacked the funds to do the job. Yes the big institutions were deplorable, but let me let you in on a secret so is living on the streets when you are so sick you don’t even know who you are. How do I know? Because I have been in that position.
One time in New York City when I was on the streets they gave me a subway token to go to another place for help and I thought it was money. I went into a restaurant to try and spend it. They called the police.
From 1969 when I got out of the Army until 1989 when I started Project Dream Again, I worked in sales, management, and started my own tire company. In 1989 I started a not-for-profit corporation which is still what Project Dream Again is a division of. All my life I have been involved with churches which are nonprofits. My point is I have been in the military (government), for-profit corporations, and nonprofit corporations. The more you bring market system into the public mental health system the more corruption you are inviting and the less likely you will find the three legged stool there.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

RESOURCES
[Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this blog. The writer Ed Cooper is fully responsible for the content of this blog.]
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
faithnet.nami.org.

THE HOLIDAYS ARE COMING AND YOU CAN FIGHT STIGMA OR HELP SOMEONE YOU KNOW UNDERSTAND MENTAL ILLNESS BETTER BY ORDERING NOW: You can now order the 2007 Special Edition of the 136 page book “When Even the Devil Deserts You” by Ed Cooper with Patty Cooper . Just go to the ORDER NOW page at
www.projectdreamagain.com
The review in the NAMI Advocate in said this about the book "Living with and caring for a person with a mental illness does not necessarily lead to a direct understanding of the experience of mental illness itself. It does not automatically tell you what to say or what to do that would be kind or helpful. For this reason I find the new book, When Even The Devil Deserts You, invaluable. The book features many vivid descriptions and an occasional touch of humor. The author has a remarkable ability to understand and describe not only his own experience, but its impact on family members." [From the book review done by Carol Rees]

SPIRITUAL SUPPORTS

2007-10-18T02:51:00.001-07:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN HOMEPAGE
[A New Thought Each Day Can Be Found Here As Well As Other Important Info]
www.projectdreamagain.com
RESOURCES
[Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this blog. The writer Ed Cooper is fully responsible for the content of this blog.]
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
faithnet.nami.org.

YOU CAN HELP PROJECT DREAM AGAIN BY ORDERING NOW: You can now order the 2007 Special Edition of the 136 page book “When Even the Devil Deserts You” by Ed Cooper with Patty Cooper . Just go to the ORDER NOW page at
www.projectdreamagain.com
The review in the NAMI Advocate in 1993 said this about the book "Living with and caring for a person with a mental illness does not necessarily lead to a direct understanding of the experience of mental illness itself. It does not automatically tell you what to say or what to do that would be kind or helpful. For this reason I find the new book, When Even The Devil Deserts You, invaluable. The book features many vivid descriptions and an occasional touch of humor. The author has a remarkable ability to understand and describe not only his own experience, but its impact on family members." (The book was first published by Dream Again Press in 1992, but it is as relevant today as it was then.)
[From the book review done by Carol Rees]

Spiritual Supports/ October 18, 2007

I was sitting reading about mountain top removal while waiting on it to be time for my therapy session. Mountain top removal is exactly what it sounds like. They remove the top of a mountain to get to the coal. It is a ruthless method to get at cheap energy so we can go on living our consumer driven lives. It has destroyed many mountains, streams, and valleys in my home state of Kentucky and other Appalachian states.

One day I was sitting on the poach with my wife’s father who died last year and we were watching a train go through the little town of Glen Alpine, North Carolina where I now live. It was loaded with coal. At the time Patty and I lived on a farm in coal country in Kentucky. He remarked, “I don’t see how there could be any coal left in Kentucky because I have been watching them bring it down these tracks all my life.”

Our way of life destroys the beauty of God’s creation and whether we want to acknowledge it or not it destroys a part of our souls. The beauty of nature and its wonders is one of our spiritual supports.

Another spiritual support is our family. Today is the birthday of my wife and my daughter-in-law. It is a special day because these two women are important in my life and I am glad they were born. To celebrate their birth is my honor.

Sometimes we forget to say thanks to the people around us who make our lives easier. Everyone needs a support system. When earlier this year I faced having to have a traditional abdominal aortic aneurysm (AAA) surgery, these where two of the women I leaned on the most along with my two sisters. They came through for me.

My wife has had to live with the ups and downs of my bipolar illness since 1989 when we got together. My daughter-in-law I call my “worry wart”. Not as a derogatory term, but because I know I can count on her to listen to me and care about what is happening to me. She will worry right along with me and that feels good.

Last night when I came home from my therapy session Patty was at prayer meeting. My sister-in-law sat with me a short time while I just relaxed from having to talk about tough stuff. She was there for me. My step-son had made the trip to the mental health clinic with me.

Some mornings I take coffee and a sausage and egg biscuit over to my mother-in-law’s house and we have breakfast together. We may talk half the morning. The breakfast food is not what is important. It is the soul food I get there that makes the morning so meaningful. Family feeds the inner being.

The friends I made when I lived in Florida keep feeding my soul. When one of them writes and says we miss you, it feels good. One of the women I respect the most from down there wrote “I used to think I didn’t want you. I learned better. You are sorely missed here.” I will not tell you her name, but I will simply say she is one of the strongest people I have ever met. I dearly love her as a person and what she has done for folks like me.

My new church family feeds me each time I am around them. They have embraced me with the Grace God offers all of us. The pastor speaks with me often and I never have a conversation with him that I don’t laugh. For those of you who know me you know I don’t laugh often.

I believe everyone needs a natural support system. The main mission of Project Dream Again is to help the church, other faith communities, community organizations, mental health providers, and individuals come to understand how important a natural support system is to the recovery journey. WE CANNOT DO IT ALONE.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

BEING PART OF A COMMUNITY

2007-10-15T04:08:00.000-07:00

PROJECT DREAM AGAIN HOMEPAGE
www.projectdreamagain.com
RESOURCES
[Being on this resource list does not imply their endorsement of this blog. The writer Ed Cooper is fully responsible for the content of this blog.]
www.mentalhealthministries.net
www.pathways2promise.org
faithnet.nami.org.

Being Part Of A Community/ October 15, 2007

The whole thrust of the mental health movement since the 60’s has been to move folks out of institutions into the community. Closing state hospital beds is still the buzz word. Being in the community is the goal. But what does that mean?

Does that mean sitting in some room alone most of the time because you have no friends? Does it mean being able to do very little in the community because you are forced to live in poverty on a disability check? How does a person who has spent months or years in a hospital ever become part of the larger community again?

When I first moved to south Florida in the early 90’s, I spoke out at a public meeting against the idea of closing South Florida State Hospital. Other consumer advocates were mad at me, but I was boiling with anger inside. I was angry at folks who did not understand the anxiety it produced to be told you were going to lose your home. Yes for many people South Florida State Hospital was their home.

I could give a speech to a crowd of 3,000 people, but I was afraid to go shopping for myself or go to a restaurant. I understood fearing the world. Anxiety disorders go along with many other mental illnesses along with paranoia and with the reality of abuse which most of us have suffered at one time or other in our lives. The world is not such a friendly place to us. Being in the community does not have the same meaning for some of us as it does for the people designing the grand plan.

Yesterday being in the community was grand. My wife and I joined the Glen Alpine United Methodist Church. The entire church filed by and welcomed us into the church family. I got more hugs yesterday morning than I have in years. I felt part of a community of faith. What a wonderful feeling.

Then in the afternoon I was invited to speak at the women’s meeting at the Snow Hill United Methodist Church on Mental Illness and the Church. My wife went with me. They had their business meeting then I did my presentation. Afterwards they asked us to stay and share a meal with them. Again I felt part of a community.

I have been locked away on a mental ward. I have lived on the streets hungry and alone. Yesterday, God’s people made me feel like I was part of a community. What a wonderful day.

I got a number of replies to my last blog about how to advocate. Here they are without any further comment from me.

CLARK REPLY

Mr. Cooper:
Have read your recent comments concerning follow the money in the N C Mental Health system. In 1983 I retired as career N C State employee from
The N C Department of Human Resources. Since that time I have operated my own business in the private sector dealing with people from all walks
Of life.
I served also as a N C State Senator 1995, 1996, 1997, and 1998 serving on the health and human services appropriation committee. It didn’t take
Me very long in starting to pursue the various money trails in the mental health system after I received numerous complaints from mental health
Clients that direct services dollars were going to “bricks and mortar” in lieu of services. I was one powerless State Senator against the entire political
Power structure!
One needs to follow the money trail from the time the mental health reform legislation was introduced which forced the local regional mental health
Entites to dispose of their bricks and mortar empires. A major question in my mind is was this done above board. I think not!
The N C State Senator from Buncombe County who sponsored the mental health reform legislation resigned his Senate Seat under an ethical cloud.
These are just a couple thoughts on my experiences with the mental health system in N C. As the majority of people know the reform has been a
Total disaster.
Regards,
R L Clark
2 Quail Cove Rd.
Asheville, N C 28804
828-645-3548

Mumpower Reply

Mr. Cooper,
I appreciate the continuing opportunity to speak to our failed state mental health delivery system. May I respectfully suggest that after 6+ years of dysfunction, paralysis, and recycled harms, some sense of urgency and action around this issue might be appropriate?
Like yourself, I value the opportunity to cooperate and work with others. If, on the other hand, while doing so we are standing on the backs of people in pain, this cooperative effort might speak more to self service than an authentic concern for those we purport to serve.
It would be my continued suggestion that a recall initiative against the elected officials who have repeatedly failed to uphold their charge with our state mental health system might be a productive action step toward affecting improvements.
Yours,
Carl Mumpower

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com

ORDER NOW: You can now order the 2007 Special Edition of the 136 page book “When Even the Devil Deserts You” by going to the ORDER NOW page at
www.projectdreamagain.com
The review in the NAMI Advocate in 1993 said this about the book "Living with and caring for a person with a mental illness does not necessarily lead to a direct understanding of the experience of mental illness itself. It does not automatically tell you what to say or what to do that would be kind or helpful. For this reason I find the new book, When Even The Devil Deserts You, invaluable. The book features many vivid descriptions and an occasional touch of humor. The author has a remarkable ability to understand and describe not only his own experience, but its impact on family members."
[From the book review done by Carol Rees]

HOW TO ADVOCATE?

2007-10-11T00:17:00.001-07:00

HOW TO ADVOCATE?

2007-10-11T00:17:00.000-07:00

A PLACE TO FIND GRACE

2007-10-08T00:52:00.000-07:00

Random Thoughts

2007-10-04T09:06:00.001-07:00

Random Thoughts/ October 5, 2007

After the blogs about the North Carolina mental health system I got the most responses I have gotten since I started writing this blog. I want to share on of them with you. I got her permission to do so if you were wondering. This came in from Jana who works in south Florida.

“They will never fix it. We, the "broken" ones, have to find ways to heal. And as we do, bring others along. I'm with you: They will never do it. I'm tired of asking them to. After all, what's in it for them? Not even a decent paycheck any more. So, we'll do what we've always done: appeal to He who Himself was broken, and does heal, truly heal, from the inside out, and use whatever they've got that might help.
God help them for saying one thing and doing another. All of us are the children of one God, who does not look kindly on his children mistreating his children. They will have to answer.
Jana”

I guess I don’t have anymore to add on the subject. She said it very well.

I don’t know whether any of if have been reading the “On Faith” discussions hosted by Sally Quinn and Jon Meacham on washingtonpost.com, but I find them very interesting.
This is what their site says about “On Faith”

“Religion is the most pervasive yet least understood topic in global life. From the caves of the Afghan-Pakistan border to the cul-de-sacs of the American Sunbelt, faith shapes and suffuses the way billions of people-Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Hindu, Buddhist, and nonbelievers-think and act, vote and fight, love and, tragically, hate. It is the most ancient of forces. As Homer said, "All men need the gods." Even the most ferocious atheists find themselves doing intellectual battle on a field defined by forces of the faithful.”

The most interesting piece was posted the other day. I will not try to quote the entire argument because I am not sure I even was able to follow it, but here is a short quote from the piece.

“It is easy for religious faith, even if it is irrational in itself, to lead a sane and decent person, by rational, logical steps, to do terrible things. There is a logical path from religious faith to evil deeds. There is no logical path from atheism to evil deeds. Of course, many evil deeds are done by individuals who happen to be atheists. But it can never be rational to say that, because of my nonbelief in religion, it would be good to be cruel, to murder, to oppress women, or to perpetrate any of the evils on the Hitchens list.
The following quotation from the Nobel prize winning physicist Steven Weinberg has become well known, but it is so devastatingly true that it is worth quoting again and again: “With or without [religion] you’d have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, it takes religion.”
(Richard Dawkins has been the Charles Simonyi Professor of the Public Understanding of Science at the University of Oxford since 1995. The "On Faith" panelist did his D.Phil under the Nobel Prize-winning zoologist Niko Tinbergen. After two years as an Assistant Professor of Zoology at the University of California, Berkeley, he returned to Oxford in 1970 as Lecturer in Animal Behaviour and a Fellow of New College. The British evolutionary biologist is noted for his writings defending evolution. An atheist, his latest book is The God Delusion(2006). He is the author of eight other books.)

The most interesting thing about it to me was that this time it was not us they were blaming the evil acts on. No mention of mental illness being the cause of evil. What a relief.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.projectdreamagain.com

Suicide and the Family

2007-09-30T11:49:00.001-07:00

Have you ever had a loved one commit suicide? The question is always why did they do it or did I fail my loved one in some way?

Suicide is a major, preventable public health problem. In 2004, it was the eleventh leading cause of death in the U.S., accounting for 32,439 deaths. The overall rate was 10.9 suicide deaths per 100,000 people. An estimated eight to 25 attempted suicides occur per every suicide death.(NIMH) That means that lots of families are touched each year in this country either by a member committing suicide or attempting to.

For Christians it becomes a problem not only of feeling the loss of the loved one, but dealing with the issue of the person’s eternal soul. The truth is that folks should not underestimate the Grace of God. Family members who have lost loved ones to suicide need to hear the following words. They come both from Jewish texts and Christian texts.

Behold, the arm of the Lord is not shortened, that it cannot save, or his ear dull, that it cannot hear" (Isaiah 59:1). The loved ones who are left in grief can take comfort from knowing "it is not the will of the Father that any of these should perish" (Matt. 18:14). We have the promises, "He does not deal with us after our sins, nor requite us according to our iniquities" (Psalm 103:10) and "My Father is greater than all...and no one is able to take them out of the Father's hand" (John 10:29). In the face of these great mysteries, we can assure ourselves, "Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?" (Gen.18:25).

When you read the risk factors below you will begin to understand that we are not talking about sin. We are talking about an illness. The Judge knows that. Men and women here on this earth may not, but the all knowing Creator and our final Judge does. He will do right. In my humble opinion I find nothing in the Bible that says folks will go to hell for acts caused by an illness. My Bible tells of Jesus healing the sick not sending people away to eternal damnation.

“What are the risk factors for suicide?
Research shows that risk factors for suicide include:
depression and other mental disorders, or a substance-abuse disorder (often in combination with other mental disorders). More than 90 percent of people who die by suicide have these risk factors.
stressful life events, in combination with other risk factors, such as depression. However, suicide and suicidal behavior are not normal responses to stress; many people have these risk factors, but are not suicidal.
prior suicide attempt
family history of mental disorder or substance abuse
family history of suicide
family violence, including physical or sexual abuse
firearms in the home, the method used in more than half of suicides
incarceration
exposure to the suicidal behavior of others, such as family members, peers, or media figures.
Research also shows that the risk for suicide is associated with changes in brain chemicals called neurotransmitters, including serotonin. Decreased levels of serotonin have been found in people with depression, impulsive disorders, and a history of suicide attempts, and in the brains of suicide victims.
If you are in a crisis and need help right away:
Call this toll-free number, available 24 hours a day, every day: 1-800-273-TALK (8255). You will reach the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, a service available to anyone. You may call for yourself or for someone you care about. All calls are confidential.”
(NIMH)

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.projectdreamagain.com

NC MENTAL HEALTH SYSTEM?

2007-09-28T01:51:00.000-07:00

If you remember I quoted Carl Mumpower, a member of the Asheville, NC City Council, in this blog on September 21st in which he wrote these words in an op-ed piece for the Asheville Citizen-Times, “It ended with the abandonment of earlier promises and a bungled transition to a state-funded hybrid system morphing a safety net into a mineshaft.”

Being born in Eastern Kentucky in coal country I know the dangers of a mineshaft. They kill coalminers each year.

I have written before about the death here at the state hospital in Burke County were I live. This appeared Monday in the Morganton paper.

“Broughton losing millions
By Sharon McBrayer
smcbrayer@morganton.com
Monday, September 24, 2007
Morganton - In an effort to restore $1 million a month in Medicare and Medicaid funding at Broughton Hospital, the state is stepping in.
Staff supervision and training are top priorities, said Dr. Michael Lancaster, Dempsey Benton and Mike Moseley, all with the N.C. Department of Health and Human Services.
Medicaid and Medicare funding was pulled on Aug. 25. The decision came on the heels of a patient's death on Feb. 1 and another patient's injuries on Aug. 19. “

MINESHAFTS ARE DANGEROUS PLACES TO BE GIVEN TREATMENT? You had better hope you never need them.

Actually, I am trying to be kind. A few years ago in South Florida when writing about deaths at South Florida State Hospital I called them murders. When another person sits on the chest of a person until they are dead you tell me what it is.

The folks up here are smarter than the folks in South Florida. I sat on a number of boards down there including the board of South Florida State Hospital. Maynard Taylor, a Burke County Commissioner, asked me to apply for the board of the Mental Health Services of Catawba County which now is the entity that hands out the state money for both Burke and Catawba County. They call them Local Management Entities. I did not make the board. Patty who had been the state director for PAIMI in Florida thought I would make a good member of the PAIMI advisory council here in NC. I did not make that either. So the fact is I am free to say what I want which is the way I like it as all of you who know me know.

One of the lead stories in the Asheville Citizen-Times on September 25th was about the NC Mental Health System?

“By Leslie Boyd
LBOYD@CITIZEN-TIMES.COM
September 25, 2007 12:15 am
ASHEVILLE - In a system where the catchphrase is “no closed door,” people with mental illnesses are finding no door at all, say frustrated providers of mental health services.
Agencies are closing or losing therapists, social workers and psychologists as a crushing load of regulatory changes push costs well ahead of reimbursement rates.
Amid the tumult, people like Patrick Diraffale, who has bipolar disorder and anxiety disorder, are placed on waiting lists or told to go to an emergency room or agency that deals with patients in crisis, places that might be able to offer real help.
Diraffale was told last week he would have to wait three months for an intake appointment at a local services provider after being hospitalized for six days. He is out of medication, and has been told to use the “coping mechanisms” he was taught in the hospital.”

My question is can they find any gold down in the mineshaft? Our new Secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services appointed by Gov. Easley on September 5, 2007 had been Chief Deputy Secretary from January 2001 until February 2007 at the NC Department of Environment and Natural Resources. Maybe he can find the gold!!!

My father has been dead a number of years now. He was a pastor and a teacher/principal. One of the things we discussed/argued about was his contention that a good teacher could take any textbook and teach any subject even if they did not know the subject. I said I did not believe it. Likewise, I don’t care how good a man or how good a manager Secretary Benton is I want to know what he knows about Health and Human Services. I want to know what he knows about mental health the system that has become such a mess.

Who will fix it? No one. Why? Because it will never be funded to the level that is needed and they will never come down out of their ivory towers and ask the real experts.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.projectdreamagain.com

TRI-POLAR SPIRITUALITY

2007-09-25T03:20:00.000-07:00

Professor of Pastoral Counseling David Augsburger spoke about some of the concepts of his latest book, Dissident Discipleship, in a "fireside chat". This was the second in a series of these gatherings, sponsored by Fuller’s Office of Alumni/ae and Church Relations, designed to offer alumni/ae and friends the opportunity for discussion and dialogue with a Fuller faculty member in a more intimate setting.

The premise of his Dissident Discipleship book, Augsburger explained during the gathering, is that there are three poles of spiritual orientation: mono-polar, bi-polar, and tri-polar. Mono-polar spirituality, the first step, “is an opening of the soul, the beginning of soul-making. It seeks a spirituality that discovers the sacred within, the holy in nature, the numinous mysteries of one’s inner depths and their connection to the universe.”

Bi-polar spirituality, Augsburger went on to describe, happens when the God of our own creation and celebration dies and we encounter a God who is sovereign and truly other—“who stands above all human manipulation, beyond our strategies of control.” Moving into this phase can be a shattering kind of death experience, he said, when we can no longer say “my God is my own.”

Tri-polar spirituality, he said, occurs when we realize that love of God cannot be split from love of other. Love for God and neighbor, two aspects of one and the same love, become inextricably united. “It begins in the radical, subversive walk of living out love without conditions, exceptions, exemptions; it ends in following the ultimate dissident exemplar, Jesus, who said: ‘A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another as I have loved you.’” (This is From Fuller Theologically Seminary’s Web Site)

Being raised on a mission field in southern Africa service to others has been part of my life since I was a kid. In fact, I was mad at my father for the amount of time he spent on his work which left no time for me. More about service later.

The mono-polar spirituality may really be the hardest for me. It requires that I look within my own soul and I don’t like to look there. I don’t seem to have any trouble looking at others and finding their flaws, but to take a good long look deep within myself is very painful.

One day as I was walking along a beach in California when I looked down and saw a tiny flower growing. It was growing in a place I could not see how it was living and the funny thing was I never even see big flowers much less small ones. . I had left a seminar to take that walk and seeing the tiny creation of God it was the beginning of a journey. The next time I looked into my soul I saw a tiny light in the darkness of my inner being. By beginning to see the world around me I began to see inside myself.

Bi-polar spirituality is simply being willing to hand over to God what is already His. Now Bipolar has a different meaning to me. It means my illness. It means going from depression to manic highs. It means having to take medications every day. Here it means coming into a relationship with the Creator after having found the light in the darkness of your soul.

Tri-polar spirituality is more than service. It can heal the pain of your own soul. Gandhi taught service to others not just as a way to build a nation, but as a way to get people to see each other as neighbors and live in peace with one another. Jesus taught service to others not just as a way to heaven, but as a way to bring a peace beyond all understanding to one’s soul.

Helping others will get you further along the recovery path than anything else you can do. Tri-Polar Spirituality is one of the main keys to recovery.

You can reach me directly at edcooper@projectdreamagain.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.projectdreamagain.com

HOUSEKEEPING

2007-09-22T02:07:00.000-07:00

HOUSEKEEPING ABOUT ED’S BLOG/ September 22, 2007

I need to cover a few things about my blog.

First, it will come out twice a week. Tuesdays and Fridays. I write it mainly as therapy for myself, but from the number of emails I get apparently some of my readers get something out of it too. For that and for my readers I am grateful. Thank you for taking the time to share my thoughts with me and feel free to reply to anything you read in the blog.

Secondly, I need to make clear that I thought Councilman Mumpower’s op-ed piece was right on target. It was a long and powerfully written piece and I feel he is an advocate for those of us with disabilities. It may have been unfair of me to pick a single word such as victim out of his piece and write my blog around it. I would encourage you to go online to the Asheville Citizen-Times and read his entire op-ed piece. I think the points I made about victim hood are valid and I wanted to use the quote, but maybe I did not make clear how strongly I agreed with the points his piece made.

Thirdly, a loyal reader brought to my attention that I keep using the phrase “mentally ill” rather “people with mental illnesses”. This was not the person who called me on this before in such an angry tone. This reader did it in kindness and maybe I can remember it better because of the tone that was used this time. I go deaf when I am yelled at, but this reader was not yelling. He was simply making the valid point that “the phrase ‘the mentally ill’ has no person in it.” Well if I am trying to get the world to see us as fully human then my language must reflect that. I promise to try to do better and I thank this reader for his gentle approach to helping make this blog better.

There is a SPECIAL EDITION of my book “WHEN EVEN THE DEVIL DESERTS YOU” being printed. It will be available from Project Dream Again sometime after the 1st of October. This new edition is dedicated to Cassy Edwards and Roy Dale. I will let you know how you can get a copy soon after the first of the month.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

YOU CAN READ THE BLOG AT
BLOG: http://projectdreamagain.blogspot.com
BLOG: http://blog.myspace.com/littleclearcreek
BLOG: http://geocities.com/eecoop_2000/blog.html
BLOG: http://www.7villages.com/FamiliesoftheMentallyIll

ARE THE MENTALLY ILL VICTIMS IN NC?

2007-09-21T04:18:00.000-07:00

“Scapegoating one bureaucrat for recent misjudgment does not conceal a mental health system that was undermined by many hands over many years. It began in the 1960s with an unsustainable government promise establishing a statewide system available to all. It evolved into a complex nightmare in the 1980s, when that same government’s controls and inefficiencies generated costs of service double that of private providers. It ended with the abandonment of earlier promises and a bungled transition to a state-funded hybrid system morphing a safety net into a mineshaft. Not one of the host of players — elected or appointed — who were complacent or complicit in the demise, is being held accountable. The consequences, as usual, are reserved for the victims.” Carl Mumpower is a military veteran who currently serves on the Asheville City Council in Asheville North Carolina. His op-ed piece was posted online August 29, 2007 at 12:15 am in the Asheville Citizen-Times.

Well Carl if we are victims it is the victims of the stupidity and stigma from chronically normal people, but we do not accept the role of victim hood. We are organized into groups of brotherhoods and sisterhoods all across this country. You would just have to look at such places as Rebel’s, 9Muses, and PEER Center in South Florida as examples of places operated by consumers of mental health for consumers to know we are not victims, but rather folks capable of doing wonderful acts of kindness for each other. Or maybe go into the Broward County jail in South Florida with Jana as she does her work with inmates and see if you think you are watching a victim or a strong and worthy person doing a job few folks could or would do. There are other examples in South Florida and here in North Carolina and all across America.

I agree with you Carl that none of the promises that were made to us have been carried out. I agree that the public mental health system is a mess. And just for your information Carl since you are a vet the Veterans Administration isn’t doing any better and maybe worse.

The piece below breaks my heart.

“Broughton loses money over Feb. patient death
From Staff Reports
news@morganton.com
Saturday, September 1, 2007
Morganton - Broughton Hospital lost its federal funding for Medicaid and Medicare patients after an investigation into a patient death there in February.
An autopsy found a male staff member was on top Anthony DeWayne Lowery’s torso for two to three minutes before the 27-year-old died. An original autopsy report said the Broughton staffer was 300 pounds. An amended report this month said that weight was incorrect.
The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services ordered Broughton to devise a plan to avoid incidents like Lowery’s death.”

The death is horrible and the loss of money will mean that some of us somewhere will not get the services we need. To replace the money they will have to take it from someplace.

The truth is that if you live in some counties in North Carolina and have a mental illness or an addiction or are dually diagnosed as lots of us are there are more services than in others. Not having the same amount and quality of services available to people no matter where they live in this state is a crime.

How will they ever get things put together in the public mental health system where they serve people in the proper way? When they start listening to the folks who know. Who knows? The folks with the problems, their families and loved ones, and the front line workers.

I was asked by a county commissioner of Burke County, NC to apply for the board for mental health, substance abuse, and developmental disabilities for Burke and Catawba counties. I did and gave references from South Florida. One of my references in South Florida said she told them that if they did not want to hear the truth they did not want me on their board. She had watched me serve on boards down there for almost 13 years. I did not make the board which is perfectly OK. No advocate needs a vote. All information about public money and how it is used is public and all meetings have a time you can speak. I don’t have to be a member of a board to be heard. If I have an issue I think needs to be heard I will get it heard. As I said in the beginning of this blog. We don’t have the mental attitude of victims. WE ARE PERSONS even if the new Person to Person Manual in North Carolina does not really show that and we will be heard even if we don’t have a place at the voting table and are only on advisory boards.

The system may try to make us victims by being an under funded mess and even kill us at times by sitting on our chests in an improper restraint, but it can’t make us a victim unless we believe we are. As long as we believe we are persons we can climb higher than the system ever dreamed we could.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

WHO IS WILLING?

2007-09-13T16:54:00.000-07:00

WHO IS WILLING?/September 14, 2007

There will not be a blog sent out Monday. I am taking a small vacation. I will try to get another one out on September 21st.

A couple of days ago as I was driving back from my therapy session I was thinking about how I got started in the advocacy arena. It was in 1987 and I was a traveling salesman with lots of time to think between sales calls and at night in my motel room. I was struck by the fact that the church I grew up in and am an ordained minister of did not have a single outreach ministry to folks with mental illness or their families that I knew of. In 1988 I started putting together a survey to find out if I was correct. When I did the survey I did not find any, but I did find that over 30% thought mental illness had some relationship to sin and some even considered it demon possession.

I then expanded my research to other denominations and discovered that there were mental illness networks in some of them and that some churches had special ministries for folks like me. Faith communities as a whole were not doing much, but a few were.

In 1989 I started Christian Friends of the Mentally Ill in Asheville, North Carolina and began writing and speaking on the subject of the church and the mentally ill. I became the Co-Chair of the Religious Outreach Network of what was then called the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill. At NAMI’s 1991 national convention in San Francisco Laurie Flynn, then Executive Director of NAMI, read to the convention a poem I wrote entitled “When Even the Devil Deserts You” which had been published in the January/February 1991 issue of Church & Society a journal of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.)

From the early 90’s into this decade I spent nearly 13 years in South Florida as an independent advocate for folks suffering from a mental illness. It was in Broward County, Florida that Project Dream Again was born. I do not regret a moment of those years, but they were not focused on the purpose I had when I began in 1987. I intend to return to my roots.

I will not stop advocating that the public mental health system do the job they are funded to do or demanding that our public officials give them the funds to do it with. The change in focus is to return to challenge faith communities to do their job. The job God gave them of showing His grace to the entire world and that includes us and our families.

Why do I want to return to my roots? Because I believe in a natural recovery process and the public and private mental health system is just a small part of that. Faith communities are a natural part of the community and a large number of people’s support systems. Natural supports are crucial to the recovery process therefore faith communities are crucial to us.

Back to my roots is back to the Creator who gave birth to this earth and to me. In His embrace and with His grace I and my fellow sojourners can make the climb and reach our highest dreams. We can find a safe place to be and peace for our troubled souls. Who is willing to welcome us and show us the way?

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

MAIL,MEDICATIONS,and ME

2007-09-10T02:13:00.001-07:00

Mail, Medications, and ME/September 10, 2007

Stay with me on this story even if it seems to have a long beginning. It does have a point. As those of you who have been reading this blog for awhile know my wife and I just moved from a farm in eastern Kentucky to Glen Alpine, NC a few months ago. I still drive to Johnson City, Tennessee to get some of my medical care. The fact is it is hard to break in a new psychiatrist or psychologist every time you move. So I drive the 2 and ½ hours one way to get my psychiatric care from folks I am comfortable with.

On my way back on my last trip I stopped at the U.S. Post Office in the little town of Erwin, TN to mail three envelopes I needed to get weighed to see how much postage was needed. I was mailing a booklet called “Serious Mental Illness: Seeking A Comprehensive Christian Response” which was developed by the Task Force on Serious Mental Illness of the Advisory Committee on Social Witness Policy of the Presbyterian Church (USA). I had just purchased the three envelopes at Wal-Mart up the road and they only had the kind with bubble in them. I was mailing the booklets to the pastor of the Glen Alpine United Methodist Church, a person in a federal prison, and a friend in San Diego, CA. The envelopes all were sealed and had my return address on them indicating I was from Glen Alpine.

The lady who was serving me began asking questions about the envelopes and then called a man over. They even asked me where I had been and where I was going? Where I lived and why was I mailing my mail from Erwin? Remember, I had just finished my visit with the mental health professionals and was on my way home. Now I was being interrogated by the postal police. I told them to open the envelopes and look for themselves if they did not believe me, but those folks were not about to open those envelopes for no amount of money. Finally, after about ten minutes they let me go and I guess my envelopes went out. I have not heard from the folks yet if they got them.

The entire time I was on the verge of losing it. I don’t mean simply getting angry. I mean I almost could not mentally handle the situation. I had just been through a tough session with my psychologist. My medications are not adjusted very well at the moment. I just went through the trauma of a move and a wreck. I did not take the interrogation at the Post Office well.

When I lived on the streets I hid from anyone in uniform because I knew they would hassle me. I to this day obey all speed limits trying to avoid having to speak with a person with a uniform on. Of course I did have to recently when Patty and I were involved in the car wreck. The folks in the Post Office had on uniforms. It was not fun.

The point is we are coming up on the 6th anniversary of 9/11 and I know it has changed things for all of us, but for some of us it has made our lives much more difficult. The more paranoid that chronically normal people get the harder it is for those of us with a serious mental illness to navigate in public. People that use to give us a break or overlook something we did no longer do.

Do you know how many of us get locked up each year just for simple trespass? Do you know how many of us get a felony charge against us because of something that happens during getting arrested for trespass or during getting picked up for involuntary commitment? Do you know how many of us die at the hands of the police? Of our care givers? Or how many of us of all ages simply give up and take our own lives because we can’t navigate this world any longer.

Folks let me tell you what I believe and you can call it part of my delusional system if you want. I believe the hand of God was on my shoulder in that Post Office in Erwin, TN the other day or Patty would have had to come get me out of the jail or hospital over there. I believe He kept me sane when the postal workers went postal on me trying to mail out a booklet published by a church about mental illness. The only thing I have to rely on sometimes is that God walks with me.

Please share your faith and show the Grace of God to my fellow sojourners. We all need HIM.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

WE ARE BIO-PSYCHO-SOCIAL-SPIRITUAL BEINGS

2007-09-07T01:32:00.000-07:00

Sharon Begley wrote a piece for NEWSWEEK which she starts out with these words, “For doctors who treat illnesses that strike from the neck down, a patient's symptoms are only the first step toward a diagnosis. No sooner do they hear ‘It hurts when I climb stairs’ than they order blood work, X-rays or other tests. In psychiatry, though, the laundry list of symptoms is it, the only basis for diagnosis. Maybe that helps explain why 70 percent of patients with bipolar disorder are misdiagnosed, as are up to half of women with depression.”

Remember my last blog. I wrote about why we had to get the diagnosis right for our kids because psych meds were not health foods. Well, it turns out that I am not the only one writing on the subject of how difficult it is to get the proper diagnosis and then to get on the right meds.

A year ago I had to go off the main medication I take for my bipolar disorder and a year later I am still trying to find the right med and dosage to do the job as well as was being done by the med I had to go off of. I have spent a year close to mania and in fear of breaking through into full blown mania. My wife’s life has not been as pleasant to say the least.

She goes on to write, “The American Psychiatric Association is updating its immense (911 pages) diagnostic manual, which offers 20 forms of bipolar disorder alone.”

I wonder which form I have. I have the form that as a friend of mine says I wish I could “move off and leave behind.” The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Text Revision (DSM-IV-TR®) is the bible, but are there really 20 different forms of my disorder?

Then she writes, “EEGs let you look at patients the way cardiologists do with EKGs, focusing on physiology, not symptoms," says psychiatrist William Richardson, who is at Overlook Hospital and in private practice in Summit, N.J. Brain measurements like EEGs not only offer the possibility of better treatment for mental illness, however. They also show that the line from brain to mind can meander like a mountain stream. For an EEG, which typically costs about $150 and takes 45 minutes, a patient has about 20 electrodes pasted to his scalp, where they measure the electrical activity of neurons—brain waves—directly beneath. In the 1980s, researchers tried to base diagnoses on EEGs, but it didn't work. The same squiggles could mean different illnesses, and one illness could be marked by different EEGs. The new use of EEGs skips the diagnosis (a label like "anxiety disorder") and goes straight to a recommended treatment. An EEG is compared with a database that includes 13,000 pairings of EEGs with which drugs helped in each case. A California company called CNS Response, which runs the database, finds a match and sends the physician an analysis indicating which drugs patients with that EEG are sensitive or resistant to.”

Now I love mountain streams. There is nothing more beautiful than a trout stream here in Western North Carolina. I take that back. My wife is. Her beauty inside and outside has done more for my darkened soul than even the mountain streams of these beautiful mountains in which I live. However, the writer can not get me to like this idea by bringing to mind a mountain stream. The above is simply no way to come up with which drug to use.

She ends her piece with these words, “One reason for the sometimes-odd pairings of illnesses and drugs is that many different brain states can produce the same mental symptoms, and many different symptoms can arise from the same brain state. Now replace "symptoms" with "mind." The path from electrical firings to mind is less mechanical than neuroscience dogma suggests. The mind has not yielded all its mysteries quite yet.”

The writer just forgot a small detail. Yes we are more than a mere set of symptoms. We are even more than mind and body. We have a soul. That is why we need the embrace of faith communities which seem to shy away from us. We are fully human. We are bio-psycho-social-spiritual beings. When will you finally see us?

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

PSYCH MEDS ARE NOT HEALTH FOODS SO GET IT RIGHT

2007-09-05T01:41:00.000-07:00

The most emailed article at THE NEW YORK TIMES as of this morning is “Bipolar Illness Soars as a Diagnosis for the Young”. It says the number of American children and adolescents treated for bipolar disorder increased 40-fold from 1994 to 2003. That makes one wonder what is going on.

The article says, “Many experts theorize that the jump reflects that doctors are more aggressively applying the diagnosis to children, and not that the incidence of the disorder has increased. In the study, researchers from New York, Maryland and Madrid analyzed a National Center for Health Statistics survey of office visits that focused on doctors in private or group practices. The researchers calculated the number of visits in which doctors recorded diagnoses of bipolar disorder and found that they increased, from 20,000 in 1994 to 800,000 in 2003, about 1 percent of the population under age 20. The spread of the diagnosis is a boon to drug makers, some psychiatrists point out, because treatments typically include medications that can be three to five times more expensive than those for other disorders like depression or anxiety.”

It goes on to say “In addition, drug makers and company-sponsored psychiatrists have been encouraging doctors to look for the disorder since several drugs were approved to treat it in adults.
“We are just inundated with stuff from drug companies, publications, throwaways, that tell us six ways from Sunday that, Oh my God, we’re missing bipolar,” said Dr. Gabrielle Carlson, a professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the Stony Brook University School of Medicine on Long Island. “And if you’re a parent with a difficult child, you go online, and there’s a Web site for bipolar, and you think: ‘Thank God, I’ve found a diagnosis. I’ve found a home.’ ”
Some parents whose children have received the diagnosis say that, with time, the label led to effective treatment.
“It’s been a godsend for us,” said Kelly Simons of Montrose, Colo., whose son Brit, 15, was prone to angry outbursts until given a combination of lithium, a mood stabilizer, and Risperdal, which was often given to children “off label,” several years ago. He now takes just lithium and is an honor roll student.
Other parents say their children have suffered side effects of drugs for bipolar disorder.
Ashley Ocampo, 40, of Tallahassee, Fla., whose 8-year-old son is being treated for bipolar, said that he had tried several antipsychotic drugs and mood stabilizers and that he had improved.
“He has gained weight,” Ms. Ocampo said, “to the point where we were struggling find clothes for him. He’s had tremors and still has some fine motor problems that he’s getting therapy for. But he’s a fabulous kid. And I think, I hope, that we’re close to finding the right combination of medications to help him.”

There is no doubt the truth will remain elusive.

I spent part of this Labor Day at the home of one of my two sisters. One of her two sons was in from Texas and as always family stories were being told. I was a difficult child and I had a hard time in school which means there are plenty of stories to tell about me. The question has to be asked was my bipolar illness starting then or was my troubles caused by the childhood sexual abuse which I did not tell anyone about or was there another cause. Maybe I simply hated school. Maybe it was the fact that I was the youngest of three kids and we were the children of both the principal of the school and the pastor of the church we attended. My point is how do you make a diagnosis or decide the cause or causes of my behavior?

I have said before on this blog that a mental health professional including a psychiatrist does not have much to go on but what he or she is told by the person being diagnosed. In the case of children the parents may be used for the main source of information for making the diagnosis.

Be honest here. Does any parent really know what a child has going on in their mind? Can any parent do more than tell you what their child did not what they were thinking or their motive? Will they always tell it accurately or will they sometimes make it sound worse wanting the doctor to give their child something so they can get some relief? Will the child be honest with the doctor or will he or she tell the doctor what the parents have said they must tell?

My point here is that making a psychiatric diagnosis is not like taking a x-ray to see if your child has a broken arm. The best child psychiatrist on planet earth can’t do any better at making a proper diagnosis than the information he or she is able to gather from the answers they get and the observations they can make in the brief time they spend with the child and parents or parent.

I know my life would have been easier if I had decided earlier in my life that I was going to take my medications on a daily basis and not just when I felt like it. I am not against medications. I want them used properly. Also, I sometimes have this dream that Bill Anthony was born years earlier and Psych Rehab was there to help me years ago.

Psychiatric medications are not health foods so it is important to get it right. The stigma of a label and the side effects of the meds make this no joking matter. Children with behavioral problems and disorders need all the tools available, and they need the best trained professionals we can come up with. Whatever the study shows it shows we need to know more. Our children deserve the most accurate diagnosis they can get not just designer drugs.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

SAFE,DREAMING AGAIN,WITH HOPE

2007-08-30T02:53:00.000-07:00

In this morning’s Washington’s Post on the front page we find a story about Cho.

“The panel appointed by the governor to investigate the massacre at Virginia Tech is critical of the university's response to the shootings and its treatment of Seuing Hui Cho, concluding that lives could have been saved if officials had issued an alert sooner that a gunman was on campus. The eight-member panel also found that Cho went to the campus counseling center after he was ordered to do so by a judge in 2005 but that the center failed to treat Cho. The panel's report, which was posted online late last night, also says the center was passive in its follow-up and is missing important records about Cho's visit and telephone conversations with counselors. But the report reaches no conclusions about what many people are wondering: What Cho's motives were for the rampage April 16 and what triggered him”

I was tempted to write another blog about the matter. However, I decided enough has been said and I really had nothing to add. The truth is I don’t know anything and from reading their conclusions neither do they.

Getting inside someone’s head and heart after they have done an evil act and are dead is an impossible task. Placing blame on others who may or may not have acted as they should before the act took place is not real productive since no one can really determine what was going on with the person at the time of the act.

The only thing we know for sure is that it was a horrifying event that has resulted in pain and anguish for so many and the unexplainable loss of life. For that the entire country feels like it has been attacked. In a way we have. Each act of evil we encounter casts a dark shadow on our souls.

I have been thinking about recovery a lot lately. The recovery from a trauma like the massacre. Recovery from an auto accident like Patty and I just had. Recovery from childhood sexual abuse. The recovery path everyone with a mental illness must take. I am not saying all of these traumas are equal, but all traumas must be recovered from. What are the keys to recovery?

First, one must find a safe harbor. You can’t begin the recovery process if you feel like a ship caught in a hurricane. Part of that safe harbor is food and housing, but it is also being in a place where you are not afraid of further violence or abuse. Few people have been able to begin their recovery journey while living on the streets or still in the home of their abuser.

Second, one must learn to dream again. By this I mean to have a dream that they are working towards. You can’t get anywhere if you don’t have a destination. The person needs to decide the destination and then folks can help them reach their dream. We have all needed help and need help each day. As the old saying goes no one is an island.

Third, one must have hope. Where does hope come from? Being a Christian I can only give you a Christian answer. My hope comes from the Spirit of the Creator that lives in my soul. I work so hard to get faith communities to reach out to those in recovery because not only do they offer an natural community to belong to, but they hold one of the big keys. The key of hope that comes into one’s heart when they know they are loved by the Creator of the whole universe.

Stigma, the big enemy of recovery, can beat you into the ground, but if you know you are loved by the Maker of the world then your heart and soul will fill with the hope it takes to dream again and walk towards the destination you have decided on.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

MY FAMILY HAS SUFFERED MORE THAN ME

2007-08-27T02:17:00.001-07:00

On the National Alliance on Mental Illness’ web site they answer the question “what is bipolar disorder?” this way, “Bipolar disorder, or manic depression, is a medical illness that causes extreme shifts in mood, energy, and functioning. These changes may be subtle or dramatic and typically vary greatly over the course of a person’s life as well as among individuals. Over 10 million people in America have bipolar disorder, and the illness affects men and women equally. Bipolar disorder is a chronic and generally life-long condition with recurring episodes of mania and depression that can last from days to months that often begin in adolescence or early adulthood, and occasionally even in children. Most people generally require some sort of lifelong treatment. While medication is one key element in successful treatment of bipolar disorder, psychotherapy, support, and education about the illness are also essential components of the treatment process.”

I think a good way to describe living with bipolar disorder is by saying it is like driving in the mountains of western North Carolina where I now live. Sometimes you are high on a mountain and feel like you can see the whole world clearly and at other times you are in a hollow between mountains without much sunlight and the darkness seems to consume your soul. The problem is I am not always the best judge of exactly where I am at. Am I really on top of the mountain or is my brain just tricking me. Sometimes I ask my wife Patty, but then sometimes I don’t trust even her enough to ask her the question. At times it is very hard for me to tell where on the spectrum from depression to mania I am, but it is equally as hard for me to trust someone else to make the judgment for me.

Trust is an issue for most of my fellow sojourners or at least that is what I seem to have determined over the years talking with folks like me. It becomes even more of an issue for those of us who have been sexual abused as kids or abused at anytime in anyway. I guess I just haven’t met very many of us that don’t have some story of some kind of abuse to tell. I am not crying poor us here, but I am saying trust is a big issue for a great number of us.

Many times over the course of my life I have left my home and gone to the streets to live simply because I lost faith in the people around me and would rather take my chances where no one knew who I was. That was the period before 1989 that I call pre-Patty. I have not lived on the streets since I met Patty. That is not to say I always trust her when she tells me whether I am on the mountain on in the valley of the shadow of death.

The point is it is not easy to know where I am at a given time on the spectrum and whether I am headed up into mania or down into depression. It is not easy to know whether it is the disorder or just the ordinary up and downs of life that is causing the bumps.

I have said from the time I began writing and speaking about this issue that it is harder on the people that love me than it is on me. My family has suffered more than me because of my mental illness. That is why it is so important that faith communities reach out to those of us with mental illness and our families.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

I GOT SOUL WORK TO DO

2007-08-23T02:19:00.000-07:00

Folks this is what I call a heart to heart or a little chat. I came home last night with two psychiatric medications that they added to the three I am already taking and started reading those papers that come with them. I should never have learned to read. My new psychiatric medications are not suppose to be taken with some of the medications I am now taking both for my psychiatric and my physical problems. It says so right on those papers. Now the little trust I had is even more eroded.

We need to go back a few years. The first psych med I was ever given was Thorazine. I was given it while in the Army and after our morning medications they would take us outside for morning exercise. The hot Georgia sun and the Thorazine would make me break out in nice red spots. It had other unwanted effects also. During those months on that Army psych unit I certainly did not build any trust in psychiatric medications or psychiatry for that matter. The year was 1968.

A few years ago a person working with my son said that he was the only person he had ever known that could make the words “mental health professional” sound like a cuss word. How did my son get to that point? Why has my trust eroded?

I live in a beautiful old home on 15 acres in Glen Alpine, NC. I have a wonderful wife who loves me. I have a great family and my wife’s family has made me most welcome. I go to the Glen Alpine United Methodist Church where the folks have bent over backwards to make me feel at home. Why then do I still feel like I do not belong anywhere? Why do I not trust anyone?

When you struggle daily with a serious mental illness it erodes your confidence in yourself and it cuts into your trust of others. As you age and you face the normal physical problems of that along with those caused by the drugs you have taken over the years for your psychiatric illness your confidence slips some more. Add childhood sexual abuse and trust becomes almost impossible.

A few years ago they started asking about sexual abuse, but the funny thing is they did not fund any programs if you answered yes. I guess they just wanted to ask the question. Voyeurism is a disease and as far as I am concerned if you only ask the question without any help to offer you are simply a voyeur. It takes more than a pill to help folks who have been abused and we seem to have trouble even funding the pill part much less the long term therapy that it takes to truly be helpful to those of us who were sexually abused as kids. There are other kinds of abuse and I am not ignoring them. I simply am using childhood sexual abuse because I know about it firsthand .

The point of this heart to heart is simple. I have soul work to do. No pill will give me back what was taken away in the barn by my abuser. No pill will restore what the years of the stigma of mental illness has done to my soul. I have soul work to do that no pill can do.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

THE FACE OF GRACE

2007-08-19T02:01:00.000-07:00

These are the words from a hymn penned years ago.

1. Early, my God, without delay,
I haste to seek thy face;
My thirsty spirit faints away
Without thy cheering grace.
Isaac Watts, 1674-1748

Grace is the face God shows us and it is the face we should show others. This may be the hardest concept I have tried to write about on this blog to date. Grace sounds like a simple term, but it is not.

1 a : unmerited divine assistance given humans
2 a : APPROVAL, FAVOR b archaic : MERCY, PARDON c : a special favor : PRIVILEGE d : disposition to or an act or instance of kindness, courtesy, or clemency e : a temporary exemption : REPRIEVE
8b : the quality or state of being considerate or thoughtful
(from http://www.m-w.com/dictionary/grace)

Above are only part of the definitions found for grace, but they give us the idea of what I am trying to say here. Kind, considerate, and thoughtful acts towards our fellow sojourners without regard to measuring worthiness. Folks are worthy of our grace simply because they are our fellow humans beings.

I remember living on the streets in Los Angles one time and seeing large signs over buildings in a distance proclaiming the love of Jesus. I started walking towards them, but when I got there they were closed. Later I found out they were just places people raised money from pretending to help the homeless. The big sign hanging above the building saying “JESUS LOVES YOU” did not fill my empty stomach or hug my lonely tired body.

Days later grace was shown to me by a lady in an aid station in the main bus terminal in downtown Los Angles who saw me and called my parents back in Atlanta from a number she found in my wallet. I was so sick I was not much help to her, but her help was not based on any merit she could see. Her help was based on her heart and the fact she saw me as a person who needed her help. I saw the face of God’s grace through her face that day. I was lost on the streets and I got home to my family because of her.

Another time I was locked away on a military psychiatric unit not eating like I should. Some of the nurses were civilian employees. A civilian nurse fed me not because of merit, but because of what was in her heart.

Folks please show others the face of grace because it has healing power. It will help you and it will help the person you show the grace. You both will be winners and feel the joy that only comes when GRACE is SHOWN.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

THERE AREN'T ANY EXPERTS ABOUT WAR WHO HAVE NEVER BEEN TO THE BATTLE FIELD

2007-08-15T03:20:00.000-07:00

THERE AREN’T ANY EXPERTS ABOUT WAR WHO HAVE NEVER BEEN TO THE BATTLE FIELD

I did my first advocacy as soon as I left my mother’s womb and squalled to let the world know I was here and had needs independent of my mother’s needs. I am still at it today. I am 58 now still trying to advocate for my independence and rights as an individual. I guess I will be until the day I die.

I also try to advocate with my fellow sojourners who like me are on a pathway of recovery, but I find my hope dying day by day. I am not losing hope about our recovery. I am losing hope that we will ever be heard by the decision makers.

Oh they pretend to listen. Lip service is given to what is called person-centered services. I receive some of those person-centered services. I have family members who receive some of those person-centered services. I talk to others who receive those person-centered services. Few of the services are person-centered. Few of us even feel like we are seen as persons by the folks and organizations providing the services.

Don’t tell me about your satisfaction surveys. We tell you want we think you want to hear even on surveys we don’t have to put our names on. You have taught us to. We are as compliant as any well trained animal.

I went to a meeting here in NC the other week were the lady brought a plan for family and consumers to approve which was not even finished. Briefly went over a few parts of it. Folks ate pizza. The plan was approved. Everybody was happy. The organization will claim they met the requirements of the law I am sure and they may have because I am not a lawyer, but I can assure you it did not meet the test of truly getting input from that group. I know the difference.

MY HOPE IS DYING DAY BY DAY because we are not listened to in real ways that matter and change the way services are provided. The experts are those of us with the illness, our family and loved ones, and the frontline workers. Who is listened to as experts? The folks with $1,000.00 briefcases who have consulting firms. Anybody can form a corporation for a few hundred dollars and become a consultant, but it takes years of pain to learn enough to be called an expert about recovery. There aren’t any experts about war who have never been to the battle field and there are no experts about recovery who have not either in recovery or lived with a person recovering or worked shoulder to shoulder with them. It is that simple folks so start listening to the real experts and then doing what they say.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

NEW TRAUMA CAN KILL BECAUSE of OLD TRAUMA

2007-08-12T04:04:00.001-07:00

I looked up the definition of the word trauma at http://www.m-w.com/dictionary/ and this is what I found. “A disordered psychic or behavioral state resulting from severe mental or emotional stress or physical injury” My wife Patty and I were traumatized August 5th and we still show signs of trauma. The following is part of the newspaper account of the event.

“I-40 crash ends on a sour note
By RICHELLE BAILEY
rbailey@mcdowellnews.com
Sunday, August 5, 2007
Ever heard the saying, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade"? Well, a wreck on Interstate 40 Sunday morning could have produced gallons.
A tractor-trailer hauling 22,000 pounds of pears and 21,000 pounds of lemons overturned about halfway down Old Fort Mountain around 9:30 a.m. and straddled the concrete divider.
The crash scattered fruit for yards, and littered the highway with mounds of boxes.
Melvin A. Franks, 63, of Bounnios, Ill. was driving the 1997 Western Star east, when the brakes on the rig failed, according to Trooper J.E. Reid of the N.C. Highway Patrol. Franks told the trooper there were vehicles in front of his, so he moved into the far left lane to keep from hitting them. Part of the transfer truck jumped the concrete median barrier, and the trailer overturned, Reid stated. Franks was en route from California to Salisbury and Maryland.
MAMA, the helicopter from Memorial Mission Hospital, landed in the eastbound lanes of I-40. Rescue workers spent an hour cutting Franks from the wreckage, and, once he was freed, he was airlifted to the Asheville hospital. Officials said his injuries were not life threatening.
Hundreds of lemons and pears flew across all three westbound lanes, striking and causing damage to three other vehicles driven by motorists from Tennessee, Glen Alpine and Mooresville.
Patty Cooper and her husband Ed from Glen Alpine were on their way to visit Ed’s sister in Greeneville, Tenn. Patty said she saw the truck barreling down the mountain. The trailer began to tilt, and she doesn’t remember much after that.
"It all happened in the blink of an eye," she stated. "I don’t know what all hit us or exactly what happened. It was terrifying. … The Lord was with us because we were not injured."
Boxes of fruit were lodged underneath the Coopers’ van, and the right front wheel was knocked almost completely off. It was taken away on a rollback wrecker.”

As usual the paper did not get the quote right. When the reporter approached me I told her I had nothing to say, but Patty was talking to anybody and everybody. Patty did not say “we were not injured.” She did say, “The Lord was with us.”

This is a quote from the New York Times in an article By ERICA GOODE AND ROBIN POGREBIN Published: September 25, 2001
“In the dreams, George Humphrey is running for his life through a dark tunnel, his pursuer close behind him. He startles awake, his sheets drenched in sweat.
Mr. Humphrey's nightmares originated in a war fought three decades ago in the jungles of Vietnam. But the terrorist attacks have reopened old psychological wounds for Mr. Humphrey and for others whose carry the scars of earlier traumas, as well as for people who were already struggling with depression, anxiety disorders or other psychiatric illnesses before Sept. 11.
''New trauma awakens old trauma,'' said Dr. Rita Seiden, executive director of the Park Slope Center for Mental Health in Brooklyn.”

I am not comparing a fruit storm to 9/11 so don’t write me nasty emails, but I am saying plain as day that the trauma of the fruit storm has taken me straight back to the barn on the farm in the hills of Kentucky where my childhood sexual abuse began. Dr. Rita Seiden is right and folks working with trauma victims need to pay attention.

You may think you are merely dealing with an accident victim, but you may be looking at a young child repeatedly raped taken back there by the new event. I learned this phenomenon during Hurricane Andrew in south Florida. Hurricane Andrew was the most destructive United States hurricane of record. It blasted its way across south Florida on August 24, 1992. NOAA's National Hurricane Center had a peak gust of 164 mph—measured 130 feet above the ground—while a 177 mph gust was measured at a private home. Andrew caused 23 deaths in the United States and three more in the Bahamas. The hurricane caused $26.5 billion in damage in the United States, of which $1 billion occurred in Louisiana and the rest in south Florida. The vast majority of the damage in Florida was due to the winds. Now in a fruit storm going up the mountain from Old Fort towards Black Mountain, NC I learn the same lesson again. New Trauma Can Kill Because of Old Trauma.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

I"LL NEVER GET IT RIGHT!

2007-08-08T03:26:00.000-07:00

I’ll NEVER GET IT RIGHT!

I will never get it right. Someone will always have to correct my language. It is not that I don’t understand the importance of what Harold Maio or Rev. Susan Gregg-Schroeder, who among other things has a wonderful web site www.mentalhealthministries.net, is saying about the way I put things on this blog. I am just not a good student.

I have known Harold for years and he has gently corrected me many times going back to when Project Dream Again was publishing the DREAM AGAIN JOURNAL. He and Rev. Susan are right. Language is important.

Why do I at times have more trouble with it than at other times? I have written and taught person-centered curriculum. I believe deeply in the concepts both of them are trying to get me to be sure I always use. What is the problem?

The truth is at my core I do not truly believe I am fully human. The results of the childhood sexual abuse and living all these years with a broken brain is a damaged inner core. Deep inside is a dark place where the light does not reach. I can write and teach about person-centered principles. I can talk the right stuff, but deep within me I feel the wrong way. That means at times my writing is not person-centered. It is not as respectful as it should be.

Don’t feel sorry for me. Feel sorry for those around you who don’t even know they have the problem. At least I know why I can’t always meet Harold’s standards for language. DO YOU?

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

FEELING ALMOST NORMAL!

2007-08-05T02:07:00.000-07:00

I just got back from a trip to Fort Lauderdale, FL. While I was there I saw some of my friends and even had the opportunity to go out to lunch with one of my best friends in this world. I missed seeing one of my other best friends because she was busy the day I had free, but somehow just being in the same county made me feel closer to her.

I attended an ADM Planning Council meeting while I was there and got to go to PEER Center, a drop-in center operated by mental health consumers. At both the meeting and the center I saw old friends and made new ones.

One day we made the drive from Fort Lauderdale to Key West and back to Fort Lauderdale. Driving through the Keys is one of the top five most beautiful drives in the country and ends at one of the more unusual places you can find anywhere.

So for a few days I have almost felt normal. Sometimes I pretend I am a “chronically normal person” then something happens to remind me that I am not. Either someone will simply say “remember your illness Ed” or words with that meaning or I will feel so bad I can’t forget I have a mental illness.

I am writing this at 2 am. My mind will not be still. At this moment I can’t forget I am bipolar. I can’t pretend I have a normal brain. I almost felt normal seeing friends and going to Key West, but my reality is that I must live daily with a mental illness they call bipolar disorder.

The other reality that I must deal with is the fact that as a boy I was sexual abused. It started the winter before I was old enough to go to school. Although it physical stopped at some point, it has never really stopped because it can happen again any night. Any night I can be taken to the barn and raped again and then the blood cleaned off me. I usually wake up in the tub being washed and cleaned up, but it seems I just never get clean.
Feeling almost normal is simply a delusion for me I guess, but it was nice. A peek a being fully human. How wonderful. Recovery is about turning that delusion into reality. Maybe someday I will, but for now I am still on the journey. I am just grateful for any moment a friend makes me feel ALMOST NORMAL.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

SOCIAL CLUB OR FAITH COMMUNIITY

2007-07-28T05:52:00.000-07:00

Social Club or Faith Community?

I have been writing in this blog about faith communities, spirituality, and recovery and then I ran across an article in the The Charlotte Observer titled “Beliefs? Take your pick”. It made me begin to think about what belonging to a faith community really meant.

The article said,
“American spirituality is a mile wide but only an inch deep.
"America is awash in faith," said D.G. Hart, a church history scholar, but people often don't clearly understand what their religion teaches.
David Kinnaman, president of the Barna Group, reached a similar conclusion after directing a recent study on Americans' beliefs and behavior.
"Most Americans do not have strong and clear beliefs," he said, mainly because "they lack a consistent and holistic understanding of their faith."
Results from the study by the Christian research company tell some of the story:
• Sixty-six percent of Americans believe God is best described as the all-powerful, all-knowing perfect creator of the universe who rules the world today. This is down from 71 percent a year ago and represents the lowest percentage in more than 20 years.” There is increasing pressure on Christians to bend and shape their views into something that's popular, something that fits the pop culture's view of what spirituality ought to be," Kinnaman said. "And why would so many Americans -- seven out of 10 -- say they have made a personal commitment to Jesus but show so little evidence in their lives?” For one thing, the church has failed to teach young people to think as Christians, so many of them put Jesus on the shelf after they reach adulthood, he said.
Many people are shaky on the teachings of their faith, said Hart, a former church history professor at Westminster Seminary in Escondido, Calif.
One reason is that pastors often don't teach certain doctrines and biblical principles on certain topics, especially those that might offend people, he said. Another reason is the weakening of church discipline.
"Traditionally Roman Catholics, Protestants and Eastern Orthodox have believed that churches should supervise the lives of their members and make them accountable if they don't do what they're supposed to do," Hart said. "Some of the disciplinary aspects of the faith have been compromised for the sake of evangelism, drawing more people to come to church."
Despite the decline in traditional views, when compared with other industrialized countries, the levels of religious beliefs and behavior in the United States is still high, said Roger Finke, professor of sociology and religious studies at Pennsylvania State University.”

What does all this mean? It means that we may be treating our faith communities more as social clubs than as the place we go for spiritual growth. In the recovery process both are important. There is a social component to worship and fellowship in a faith community, but it can’t be the central or main reason for a person’s participation. Spiritual growth is more than going to a social function.

Why is spiritual growth so important to a natural recovery path and being able to live daily with a mental illness? Because any illness or trauma has lasting consequences on a person’s inner being and only by building a better inner life can one learn to cope each day as they ascend a natural path to recovery.

Being rooted in a faith community is the best place I know to grow spiritually. It affords the opportunity for social contact, but more important it provides a place to gather with folks who believe the same as I do who can help me grow in my own faith and hopefully I can be of some help to them. Helping others is another one of the keys in the natural recovery process. To feel useful to others is a great building block.

As with any building the foundation must be solid and so I became worried when I read the article. Are we building social clubs or faith communities? I hope we are building faith communities on solid foundations and are teaching those foundations to all who come to our communities for fellowship.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

SOME OF THE REST OF THE STORY

2007-07-24T06:10:00.001-07:00

READ THE BLOG AT

BLOG I: http://projectdreamagain.blogspot.com
Or at
BLOG II: http://blog.myspace.com/littleclearcreek
Or at
BLOG III: http://geocities.com/eecoop_2000/blog.html
Or at
BLOG IV: http://www.7villages.com/FamiliesoftheMentallyIll

SOME OF THE REST OF THE STORY

I received another email from my friend Jana in reply to my last blog about “supported spirituality”. I think her reaction may reflect the honest gut feeling of many of us. I thank her for allowing me to share her words here on this blog.

“Yea. That's all we need, mental health professionals supporting us in our spirituality. Thank you very much, doctor, therapist, case manager, for giving me permission to pursue God. Without your permission and your support I don't know if I could do it. Then again, I'm a mental patient, so I need your permission for anything I do in my life, don't I?
At this point, in conversation, is when I would let out the four letter word. “

Jana

I am glad that the Psychiatric Rehabilitation Journal devoted an entire issue to the topic of spirituality and recovery. I sincerely hope it opens up the dialogue the editors of the issue invited and seemed to hope for.

In Dr. Andrea Blanch’s article you will find the following words, “A few courageous clinicians and consumer/survivors have been working for change, and some advocacy organizations have started to get involved (NAMI’s ‘Faith-Net” is a notable example) but the situation remains basically unchanged.”

Maybe Dr. Blanch was unaware that going back to the early 90’s NAMI had a RELIGIOUS OUTREACH NETWORK which published the LUMEN, a quarterly newsletter of the network. I was Associate Editor of the LUMEN and National Co-Chair of the network for awhile in the early nineties. At that time Duane Glasscock was the other Chair and Claire Griffin-Francell was the network’s NAMI Board Liaison. I am not sure of the year the network started, but the LUMEN was first published in 1991. Laurie Flynn, Executive Director of NAMI in those years, was very supportive of the Religious Outreach Network.

The 1989 Spring Conference of the North Carolina AMI was called “The Mental Illness Awakening: A Call to Compassion.” The materials about the conference read, “The 1989 Annual Conference of the North Carolina Alliance for the Mentally Ill is designed to provide an opportunity for consumers of mental health services, family members with mentally ill relatives, professionals working with mentally ill persons and caring leaders of religious communities to join together to:
1) Understand the nature of mental illness
2) Learn about appropriate treatment and services
3) Devise strategies to advocate for mentally ill persons at all levels of government, within society, and within religious communities.”

John Baggett was Executive Director of NCAMI then and together we did a special Friday evening presentation called “A Ministry of Compassion With Mentally Ill Persons and Their Families.” There was special music by the A&T Fellowship Gospel Choir and also a Panel of Religious Leaders.

My point here is that there has been much done by NAMI for almost as long as there has been a NAMI to encourage a discussion about spirituality and recovery. Some of us have been working within NAMI since 1989 on this very issue. So now you know some of the rest of the story.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

SUPPORTED SPIRITUALITY?

2007-07-19T03:06:00.000-07:00

“SUPPORTED SPIRITUALITY”?

I saw the words “supported spirituality” for the first time in the Psychiatric Rehabilitation Journal. A friend from Florida had sent me her copy to read with the promise I would return it. Volume 30, Number 4 is a special issue on Spirituality and Recovery and the Editors of this issue had used the words in their piece. The article is called ,”Supported Spirituality: A New Frontier in the Recovery-Oriented Mental Health System.” It is by Zlatka Russinova of Boston University and Andrea Blanch of the Center for Religious Tolerance, Sarasota, Florida.

They talk about the “emerging evidence about the beneficial impact of spirituality on recovery”, but they also warn that “nothing would deflate the possibilities for positive change faster than being seen as an ‘anti-science’ movement.” Did they use the words “supported spirituality” to make sure everyone understood they were talking about a scientific approach to the matter?

Anyone who has been reading this blog or who has known me for very long knows that I believe that spirituality plays a central role in the recovery process, but for some reason the words “supported spirituality” seems to take away the naturalness I always associate with the process.

I have to speak about what I know. My own recovery journey and my faith and spirituality. The church is a faith community and one of the natural supports for my spiritual life. It is not the only one. Trout fishing Wilson Creek and kayaking the Catawba River are also natural supports for my spiritual life. My point is that to me “supported” makes it sound too formal and professional when I have found that the more natural the supports the better.

Let us just lay it out on the table. The mental health system can’t even get it’s own system designed correctly in most places. It does an even poorer job of coordinating care with primary health so we don’t die earlier than the general population. I cringe at the thought of what “supported spirituality” might look like designed by the mental health system that we have in most states that I know about.

There is already a “supported spirituality” system in place. They are called faith communities. They come in all shapes and sizes. They are “natural” supports. They are already proven. They pass the “best practices” test.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

TOO MANIC TO MAKE MY POINT

2007-07-15T03:12:00.001-07:00

TOO MANIC TO MAKE MY POINT

“Woe to you when all men speak well of you, for that is how their fathers treated the false prophets.” Luke 6:26 (New International Version)
New International Version (NIV)
Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

These words are recorded in what is referred to as the Beatitudes which are part of the Sermon on the Plain given by Jesus. I have never had the problem of “all men speaking well of me”.

In fact, these days I am reminded of what a friend in south Florida once said to me. She said, “You are much better at these meetings since you went on your meds.” This lady is the heart and soul of a wonderful drop-in center mainly for artist in Broward County, FL and she was then and still is a true friend. She was telling me something I needed to hear. I am not always aware of how I come across to others.

Recently, something happened here in Burke County, NC that simply sent me over my tolerance limit. In short they picked folks up for involuntary commitment without anyplace for them to go. The first 48 hours of treatment was a deputy sheriff watching them. I called and wrote letters. I went to the next mental health meeting I knew of. I called this state’s federally funded Protection and Advocacy for Mentally Ill Individuals Program. Most of the people I came in contact with would not describe me as kind, loving or compassionate.

I may never be a good advocate, but I certainly am not when I am mad and I was mad. Not only was I mad, but I am right at the point of breaking into mania. I had to change medications last September and things have not leveled off for me since. Ask my wife.

My point here is that my illness does give me knowledge I can use in understanding what a system should look like, but it can also at times make me the worst advocate in the world. Picture this, I am trying to talk to folks who to me seem to be in slow motion and it seems like their minds are working in reverse rather than going forward.

There is a danger when an advocate wants to be loved by everybody and I have seen that many times over the years. I don’t have that problem. I don’t need the attention or praise of the people in power. I just need them to understand a simple fact and I am too manic to make my point well enough to get it across.

This is the fact I want known. If you are well enough then let the people in North Carolina know this is a truth. IF YOU ARE SICK ENOUGH THAT THE STATE CAN INVOLUNTARILY COMMIT YOU, THEN IT IS IMMORAL, UNETHICAL and UNJUST TO MAKE YOU WAIT HOURS FOR TREATMENT.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

ANOTHER LETTER TO SHARE

2007-07-11T00:06:00.000-07:00

Hi Ed
I appreciate your insights and for sharing Jana’s e-mail. I have one comment about your response to her concerning appropriate language. Since I am currently writing a discussion guide to accompany a documentary by Susan Smiley on her mother’s schizophrenia (“Out of the Shadow”), I just completed a section for the chapter on Guidelines for Faith Leaders the importance of modeling appropriate language to help erase the stigma of mental illness. So I was sensitive to your comment in red below, although you later refer to “those of us with a mental illness.” Because so many of us are doing well on our medications, I also like to refer to “minister to and WITH those of us with a mental illness.” I agree with you both that we have a lot to contribute.
I’ve attached the section from my draft discussion guide below. You are welcome to share it with your e-mail group if you wish. Our website has many resources that Jana and others might find helpful in their ministry.
Take care and thanks for your insights.

Rev. Susan Gregg-Schroeder
Coordinator of Mental Health Ministries
www.MentalHealthMinistries.net

Appropriate Language When Referring to Mental illness
Faith leaders have the opportunity, and responsibility, to model appropriate language when speaking about persons with a mental illness. The language we use can compound the stigma and misconceptions about mental illness or it can educate persons and help reduce the stigma and shame associated with these illnesses of the brain. We’ve all heard stigmatizing language from other people and from the media. Words like “crazy”, “psycho”, “looney”, “nuts” or other demeaning terms are not only hurtful, they are not accurate.
The language we use should reflect our belief in the dignity of each individual and that we are all created in the image and likeness of a loving God. It is important to use “people first language.” We need to refer to people as the person they are and not the illness they have. Instead of referring to people as “the mentally ill,” we need to say, “A person who has a mental illness.” Just as we don’t refer to someone as “the cancer person,” appropriate language helps to dispel misinformation mental illness.
Many persons living with a mental illness are very productive and have much to offer in all arenas of life. We often leave these persons out when speaking about “ministry to persons with a mental illness.” We can acknowledge the contribution of this group by saying, “ministry to and with persons with a mental illness.”
Millie has a diagnosis of schizophrenia. Schizophrenia is an illness that has symptoms of delusions and hearing voices. It is not having a split personality. There are also differences in the severity of mental illnesses. It is helpful to be more specific and use the terms “serious mental illness” or “major mental illness” to describe severe disorders.

Used by permission of Rev. Susan Gregg-Schroeder
www.MentalHealthMinistries.net

IF ONLY THE CANYON COULD BE CONTRACTED

2007-07-10T00:53:00.000-07:00

Hi Ed:

I read your posts all the time; how are you? Thank you for sharing your insights with all of us.
I have a personal stake and response to this particular post, because for some years now it has been clear that this work I do is not just work, it is ministry. Ironically, of all churches I have ever interacted in, it is my childhood church, the Episcopal Church, some congregations, that has been most open to reaching out, providing space for, and in general being available for people with mental illness. They are so liberal, however, that I left years ago, disappointed with what I perceived as not standing up for the gospel and creating their own theology, separate from the Bible's. Other churches where I have found community and worship and teaching and spiritual nourishment, shy away from directly addressing the problems and the lives of those of us with serious mental illness. My current church actually taught a series out of which one message was dedicated to "emotional problems". They were surprisingly loving, understanding, wise, and smart enough to encourage people to seek professional help if needed. But when I asked about hosting a support group in the church the answer was to send me around to different people, none of whom ever returned a call or an email. I believe it will happen, in its right time. In the meantime, it's undercover--just like in the jail--I meet a person, we develop a relationship, and the spark comes up--and I go with them, spiritually, wherever they want to go. I can provide reading materials if they ask; the chaplain will provide bibles if they ask--I just can't be the one to do the asking. At church, I'll strike up a conversation with someone, and when I bring up that I live with bipolar they respond--and it goes from there. How do we get people to stop being afraid? I have no clue.

Jana Spalding

I received this email from Jana in response to my last blog and asked her permission to start my next blog with it. I first met Jana when she was working at a drop-in center in Broward County, Florida. As you can tell from the email she now works in a jail system.

We both live daily with bipolar disorder, but at first glance one may think we do not have a whole lot more in common. I am an old white man and she is a much younger attractive well educated black woman. However, first glance never tells the real story. We have two things in common for sure. Our experiences with the church and our belief that our work is a ministry.

In 1989 I was ordained as a missionary/minister to the mentally ill by the elders of a church in Georgia. I had been ordained as a Pastor at Newport, Kentucky in 1970 and as an Elder at Red Oak, Georgia in 1985. Remember in a previous blog I told you I had started preaching when I was 12 years old. My missionary/minister/educator father took me to church from the time I was born. In fact my parents dedicated me to the Lord in a service at Union Church, Berea, Kentucky when I was a baby. Why is all this important? To show you how I know the value of the faith communities to those of us with a mental illness. They are in my blood. Just like Jana does, I know how important faith communities are to us.

If we had done as much research into bio-psycho-social-spiritual “best practices” as we have into brain research, the lives of those of us with mental illness would have a far higher joy quotient as two researchers called it in a paper I once read. The joy quotient is determined by counting the number of smiles over a certain period of time. I consider it to be the best monitoring tool I ever saw.

There is no doubt that those of us with serious mental illnesses are leery of faith communities, but also there is no doubt that faith communities are uniquely equipped and committed to embrace us if only the canyon could be contracted.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

LOOKING INTO THE MIRROR OF MENTAL ILLNESS

2007-07-06T03:40:00.001-07:00

Why did the Christian community make me feel so unwelcome for so many years? Was it me or was it something they were doing? Did the Jewish community do any better? Can we talk real for a minute?

You can say it was all my fault, but was it really? I will take part of the blame. I did feel guilty for some of the things I had done. Being a minister/missionary kid and being in the pulpit myself from the age of 12 meant I knew the kind of life I was suppose to live. I knew I had fallen far short and I did not feel like the church wanted me there because of the kind of life I was living. I can blame my lifestyle on my bipolar illness and on manic episodes, but Dr. Karl Menninger wrote a book with this title: Whatever Happened to Sin? Was it my illness or my sin?

I stopped preaching on any regular basis even before I went into the military. In other words my regular ministry stopped before most folks even head off to college much less to seminary, but by that time I had been preaching 6 years and had already been a pastor of a church outside Winchester, Kentucky. The last thing I did was as a radio evangelist out of Newport, Kentucky in the early 70’s.

I knew the church well, but I did not feel like I could go there to ease the pain of my soul. I did not feel the embrace of the community of believers. The Jewish community I encountered in south Florida didn’t feel any better. My friends I am not alone in this feeling. Many of my fellow sojourners feel like faith communities have let them down.

Many folks have put their heart and soul into trying to get faith communities to reach out to those of us with mental illness. Some of those who have been around for awhile are Florence Kraft, Jennifer Shifrin, Nancy Troy, Gunnar Christiansen and Susan Gregg-Schroeder. Their efforts have not gone unrewarded, but the work is far from finished.

Most faith communities do not have any special outreach to folks like me. Wonder why? Addiction programs are far more common than any outreach to folks with serious mental illnesses. Wonder why? There are far more programs for the developmentally disabled than the mentally ill. Wonder why? There are more programs for the recently divorced than for the mentally ill. Wonder why?

I have a theory. The stigma of mental illness is so hard to fight because people fear looking at their own minds or the possibility of being mentally ill themselves. They simply do not want to look into the mirror of mental illness. Until we can get society over this hurdle we will never get the faith communities to embrace those of us with a serious mental illness which is so vital to the recovery process.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com
HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

DIAGNOSIS TO DREAMS

2007-07-03T02:34:00.001-07:00

I read the other day that evolutionary biologist were hoping for a small paradigm shift because of some new knowledge in their field was challenging their old theories. I wonder what would happen in the mental health field if they were suddenly confronted with two facts they seem to ignore. It would cause a cosmic paradigm shift. That I am sure.

Fact # 1 We are more than our disabilities. We are fully human.
Fact # 2 We have a soul.

If those two facts were truly taken into account the mental health system would look totally different than it does. Lip service is given to the idea that services are person- centered and recovery oriented, but look at what is funded and at the forms to be filled out. The services can only address the disability and there is certainly nothing person- centered about most forms.

When I spent 2 ½ hours on the Catawba River the other morning in my inflatable kayak it was a recovery oriented occasion. I felt fully human and my soul was being nurtured by the beauty of the nature provided to us by the Creator. I am lucky. I can afford such an activity. Many of my fellow sojourners live in poverty. To them what I get to do could only be a dream, but if Fact # 1 & 2 were truly incorporated into our mental health system folk’s dreams would be the goals that drove the process.

Their abilities, their dreams and the desires deep inside their souls would become more important to the system than their diagnosis. Now don’t go off screaming. I know my diagnosis is important and I know that if I go off my meds and get manic I am not an easy person to live with. I am not saying regular mental health stuff is not important, but I am saying it is not the driving force in recovery.

The driving force in recovery is feeling the embrace of a community. Feeling rooted. Believing they see you as a human rather than as something defective. Being able to dream again and see some of those dreams come true. The road to recovery begins with a diagnosis, but it only continues if folks allow you to dream and help you see some of those dreams come true.

So the mental health system’s paradigm shift would be to learn that recovery is from diagnosis to dreams.

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com

HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html

DO IT ON THE CHEAP AND IT WILL BE A CHAOTIC SYSTEM

2007-06-26T02:33:00.000-07:00

“President Robert Mugabe's government has published a bill to move majority control of ‘public companies and any other business’ to black Zimbabweans.
The goal is to ensure at least a 51% shareholding by indigenous black people in the majority of businesses. Critics say it could hurt investor confidence in Zimbabwe, suffering from the world's highest inflation and food, fuel and foreign currency shortages.
Now the Indigenisation and Economic Empowerment Bill will go to parliament. It is expected to back the bill, which stipulates that no company restructuring, merger or acquisition can be approved unless 51% of the firm goes to indigenous Zimbabweans.
The empowerment bill says that ‘indigenous Zimbabwean’ is anyone disadvantaged by unfair discrimination on race grounds before independence in 1980. It also provides for the establishment of an empowerment fund which will offer assistance to the ‘financing of share acquisitions’ from the public-owned firms or assist in ‘management buy-ins and buy-outs.’ And all government departments and statutory bodies will be asked to obtain 51% of their goods and services from businesses in which controlling interest is held by indigenous Zimbabweans.” BBC News Online

Reading about Zimbabwe these days always saddens me. When I was growing up there on Mashoko Mission in the early 60’s Africans were full of hope about their future. They believed that someday the country would be theirs and that at that time things would be better. Instead they are worse.

Also when I read the piece this morning about Zimbabwe I thought back to my days in Broward County, Florida. There the Mental Health Program Office is in the Department of Children and Families and one day the issue of 51% came up. The District Administrator for the Department (Broward County made up a District) did not think that PEER Center one of our mental health consumer run drop-in centers should have in its bylaws that 51% or more of its board must be consumers. He had not been there when we wrote the proposal and got the first money. That provision had been in the bylaws from the beginning. Unlike in Zimbabwe we were not trying to take over a business that was not ours. They were trying to take a nonprofit from our control. We got to keep control because of one person in the office who never wavered on the original concept.

Now I find myself in North Carolina and they are trying to figure out what to do after their mental health reforms did not go the way they had hoped they would.
This was recently in the Asheville Citizen-Times, “The streetwise, 18-year-old Angie Bauknight who returned to Buncombe County this year, her mother said, is very different from the innocent child who left. North Carolina taxpayers paid for three years of institutionalization in three states, Diane Bauknight said. It exposed her daughter to the wrong sort of girls, ones mixed up in gangs and prostitution. “The whole time,” she said, “we said we would like her to come home. Please just let her come home.” Local care for patients like Angie Bauknight has been rare in Western North Carolina. Care for patients in crisis — who may be suicidal or violent — would expand under plans the state House and Senate may approve. But mental health advocates say they need more than the $20 million to $24 million increase lawmakers are considering if they are to address the state’s problems. “When what you need is a long, steady, soaking rain, it’s hard to get too excited about a sprinkle,” said David Cornwell, a native of Fletcher and executive director of N.C. Mental Hope. Sen. Martin Nesbitt, the principal author of the Senate plan for mental health, defended the amount of money it provides, saying it is all a chaotic system can bear.”

When the Senator who is one of the leaders on mental health and one of the designers of the reforms calls the system “chaotic”, you know you are in trouble. The system in crisis is trying to design and build a crisis system for us. Something is wrong with this picture.

Living with bipolar disorder I have gone through a few periods of time that folks said I was in crisis. They have even taken me and locked me up “for my own good and for the good of society”. What I did yesterday may be better than a locked unit. I spent 2 ½ hours on the Catawba River in my inflatable kayak. I had to call Patty to come get me at the first bridge below the Lake James dam instead of the bridge at Glen Alpine, but I can tell you it did more for my mental health than any time I have spent behind locked doors on a psych unit

Mobile crisis teams, 24 hour walk-in crisis clinics, safe houses and how person centered, individualized and available the community services are is what makes the difference in the lives of folks and their families. Designing the system is not difficult. We know what works, but it takes money. If you want to do it on the cheap, it will be a “chaotic system.”

You can reach me directly at eecoop_2000@yahoo.com

HOMEPAGE: http:// www.geocities.com/eecoop_2000/ed.html